I nodded and pulled his hand closer to me, tugging it underneath my jaw and not letting go of it.
Fennec has always been my safe place, and being back with him filled the void in my chest I had felt for the past year.
6
She didn’t remember the things we did.
None of them, and maybe she was just suppressing it all, but how could she have forgotten about the twisted things that happened?
I wasn’t going to mention them, just in case she would feel grossed out and uneasy about it all.
It was possible for people to forget about things they experienced when they were kids, but for Vespyr, it wasn’t so long ago.
And that worried me.
We had a special bond which could never break, and even at eighteen and nineteen, there was nothing that could ever come between us.
I looked at her face as the birds sang early in the morning.
The sun was already shining, and I heard Papa walking around camp.
With Vespyr back next to me, I slept much better than without her, and although she made those voices come back, I couldn’t deny that as much as she needed me, I needed her too.
I never told her about the things running through my head when I was with her, and it made me feel sick that my brain would tell me the most disgusting and warped things in relation to her.
You want to do all those things to her.
My body tensed at those words, and I closed my eyes tightly as I continued to hold Vespyr’s hand in mine.
She hadn’t let go of it since last night, and even deep in her sleep, she wasn’t going to.
I was her safe place, but I had to be careful not to let those voices get the best of me.
I didn’t want the same thing that happened with Papa to happen with Vespyr, and at first, I had thought that keeping my distance would solve all of it.
It wouldn’t have and I knew that.
“Morning,” her soft voice croaked as she opened her eyes to look straight into mine.
“Good morning, sweet girl. Sleep well?” I asked, pulling her hand toward me and kissing the back of it.
“I missed sleeping up here and waking up to the birds singing,” she said, stretching out her other hand and yawning.
“Are you hungry? I picked berries, and I think we still have some eggs left from a few days ago.”
“What kind of eggs?”
“Duck eggs. Found them upward the river. Not sure how they’re getting that far up, but I’m not complaining.”
“Sounds amazing. I’m starving,” she said with a bright smile.
Her hand slid out of mine as she pushed herself up, letting the blanket uncover her body.
We often slept in the clothes we wore the day before, and since most of our clothes were made out of cotton, it was never uncomfortable.
I only owned one pair of jeans, which I rarely wore.
We washed our clothes multiple times a week anyway, so there was no need for us to have fifteen shirts and pants.