Page 38 of When October Starts

It was all my fault, and I felt sick to my stomach just thinking about all the consequences he would get because of me. I was just an underage girl who let her teacher get too close, and just like Benji, any other adult would point at Ezra and say that he was the one who took advantage of me.

He didn’t. If anything, I was the one to urge him into letting me get closer. But what was I supposed to do when my love for him grew stronger each day? I couldn’t stay away.

I was sitting on the steps of the old carousel, staring blankly ahead. It was almost lunch time, and Benji wanted us to meet him at two. I still had a little bit of time left before I had to face him and my mothers, and this was the only place I wanted to be for now.

My phone vibrated in my backpack, and I thought about just letting it ring. I didn’t want to talk to anyone unless it was Ezra.

Luckily, it was him.

I stared at the screen for a second, then took a deep breath and tapped the green button with my thumb.

“Juno?” I heard his voice through the phone, and after lifting it up to my ear, an uncontrolled sob left my throat.

“I’m so sorry,” I cried. That seemed to be the only thing I was able to say to him at the moment. My heart was beating fast in my chest, and I had to close my eyes to focus on him.

“I don’t want you to apologize for this, Juno,” his voice was calm, and I couldn’t help but notice the cars passing by in the background.

“Where are you?” Panic rose inside of me. I brushed the tears off my cheeks, scared to hear his answer.

He sighed. “I’m on my way to Ontario. I can’t stay any longer. Benji kicked me out.”

I couldn’t find words, so I stayed quiet and hoped he would say something that would keep my hopes up of ever seeing him again.

“I know this is hard for you, Juno, but I want you to know that I’m not giving up on you.”

“So you’re just leaving me behind?” I croaked, feeling more anger than pain now.

“I have to. We can’t be together. Not right now, but when October starts, when you turn eighteen, I will be waiting for you on the island. I love you, Juno, but it’s best if we keep our distance for now.”

He tried to sound all tough, but his shaky voice was enough for me to know that he was on the verge of crying.

“I don’t think I can wait that long, Ezra. I wanna come with you.”

“You need to complete your finals and then start college after the summer. It’s not going to be easy, but if you love me like I love you, we’ll meet again when October starts.”

His words hurt just as much as they gave me strength. He still wanted me, even if he lost his job. This town was his home, and I ripped it away from him because of a stupid mistake I made.

I was the reason why he was gone. I deserved to feel like this.

“You’re on the island, hm?” he asked softly. “I figured you’d be there.”

“I miss you. I’m sorry,” I whispered.

“Don’t,” he sighed, and I knew he was running his hand though his thick, wavy hair. “I love you, and I’ll wait for you. Don’t forget about me, Juno.”

“Never,” I sobbed, and that was the last word I said to him before he hung up the phone.

Chapter Thirty-Two

Juno

“This is serious, Juniper. I need you to sit up right and look me in the eyes when I’m talking to you.” Benji has never been this serious, and I hated it.

I crossed my arms and sat up straight, then looked over at Benji who was sitting across from me in a chair. I sat on one of the couches in Ezra’s classroom, and both my mothers were on my right, looking as disappointed and worried as ever.

“I need you to be honest with me. Only then I can report the truth to the police. He’s gone now, so you can stop feeling pressured by him.”

His words made me so fucking angry, and I wanted to throw the couch I was sitting on at him. “He never pressured me to do anything,” I muttered. This was unreal. Ezra had already been kicked out, and was probably going to lose his teaching license, but he didn’t deserve any more than that. Hell, he did not deserve any of it.

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