Page 109 of Fireworks & Forehead Kisses

“On Thanksgiving, when Declan was here, I talked to him in the kitchen, and he said something that made me think there might be a chance that you guys could try and make this work.”

“What?” My heart skipped more beats than the Go-Go’s had. “What did he say?”

“I don’t remember exactly. I still have baby brain. I think I said something about you guys having a month left, and he said yeah if that’s whatyouwant. It’s not reallywhathe said…it was more thewayhe said it… the look in his eyes. I don’t think he wants this to end.”

“He might not want it to end, but he doesn’t want a marriage. I mean…he wants a marriage but not a real marriage.”

“What’s arealmarriage?”

I sighed. I had a feeling this conversation was going to go the same way it had with Nadia. “It’s a marriage with love.”

“So hedoeswant to stay married to you?”

“Yes. I mean, he wants a wife and family, and he likes me, so I’ll do.”

“You’ll do?”

“Yes.”

“That’s what he said to you? He saidyou’ll do?”

“No, not in those words.”

“What words did he say?”

He’d said that I was the only person he wanted to marry. But I couldn’t say that because she’d read too much into it.

“I can’t remember. I have auntie brain.”

Skylar’s brows lifted, indicating she was not amused that I was using auntie brain as an excuse when baby brain was a real thing and clearly auntie brain was made up.

“It doesn’t matter. The point is, he doesn’t love me. He doesn’t think marriage and love have anything to do with each other. He says that fifty percent of marriages end in divorce because they are based on a feeling, and marriage should be based on commitment.”

“Hmm.” Skylar’s mouth twisted to the side as she bit the inside of her cheek, the way she did when she was considering something.

“No, nothmm. I will not be married to someone who doesn’t love me.”

“You were going to go onMarried by a Matchmaker. Do you think the person you married would have loved you?”

“Why do people keep bringing that up?!” I heard my voice raising as I started to get irritated, but then I stopped myself.

My sister was just worried about me. She always wanted the best for me and didn’t deserve me snapping at her. I was just cranky because I had to get a divorce from my husband, who I stupidly fell in love with.

I took a deep breath and calmly stated, “No, I don’t think whoever I was matched with would have loved me when we got married, but they would havewanted love in a marriage. That would have been the goal. That’s why they would’ve gone on the show.”

My sister’s expression indicated she did not think that was the case. “I think that’s up for debate. But it’s a moot point because you aren’t on the show. Youaremarried to Declan. Do you honestly think if you stayed married to Declan, he wouldn’t fall in love with you?”

“No. Iknowhe wouldn’t.”

“How? How do you know that?”

“Because he was with his fiancée for seven years, and he loved her, but he wasn’t in love with her.”

“Isn’t that just semantics?”

Why was no one on my side in this? If anyone should be, it should be my bestie and my sister, but I had a feeling they were both Team Declan. I get that he’s handsome and rich and he had treats me well, but he didn’t love me. That was a deal breaker. End. Of. Story.

“No. I want the same kind of love that you and Hank have. That his brothers and Cash have. That Zoe and Daphne have with Miles and Harlan. I want to be married to someone who isin lovewith me. Someone who can’t imagine being with anyone else. Someone who wants me to be the last person they see every night and the first person they see when they wake up every morning. Someone who looks at me the way Hank, Billy, Jimmy, Cash, and Clyde look at you, Reagan, Isabella, Cheyenne, and Bonnie.”

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