Page 33 of Demo

“Sorry again, man, if I made your life more difficult. If she agrees, I can come by any time to finish the installs.”

Ifbeing the opportune word. Demo had a feeling the next few hours of his life were going to involve a lot of groveling and maybe even some begging. Bottom line, despite her pride, Demo needed to know Paige was safe. She didn’t have a secretary anymore and worked alone in an insecure office building. After what nearly happened to Angel and Bree, Demo hoped and prayed she at least agreed to keep the security measures. He could see how the computer equipmentmighthave been a bit too much too soon.

But he wanted her to have everything she needed.

She’d been on her own for too long. She deserved to have someone by her side, in her corner, and dare he hope, in her bed.

CHAPTER 6

An electronic bell sounded as Demo entered the clinic. Good, at least Keys had been able to finish that before Paige had kicked him out. He hadnotliked it when he’d come into the clinic the day before and there’d been no signal to her. Demo didn’t think she would have taken away a device like that. The electricity used would have been minimal enough where it wouldn’t have affected her electricity bill. Not like turning off overhead lights—which he now noticed were all on—and taking away computer equipment would have. No, Demo suspected she hadn’t had a bell or anything over the door because she’d had a receptionist up until recently.

Bulldog sat in one of the waiting chairs. His large body was spread out with his elbows on the arm rests, his hands gripping the corners, and his booted feet planted on the floor. He looked tense as if he was getting ready to be shot out of a circus cannon. It was the agony in his eyes that held Demo’s attention, like Bulldog was burning from the inside out.

Without looking up at Demo, Bulldog confessed, “I don’t want her to know. Abby loves coming here and I will do anything to make her happy.”

Demo glanced between his SAA and the hallway that led to where Abby was getting her treatment and then back to Bulldog. “You don’t like being away from her,” he concluded. “It’s killing you to not be in that room with her.”

Bulldog nodded stiffly. “I don’t want her to know,” he repeated.

“She’s right back there,” Demo argued, unsure he understood Bulldog’s current torment. “She’s fine. You know she is. Paige would never harm her.”

Demo moved to sit in the chair next to him as Bulldog stared longingly down the hallway.

“We were separated for sixteen years. During that time, unspeakable things happened to her while I was living my life, fucking around, and trying my damndest to forget about her. Having her back in my life is a miracle beyond measure. I will never take her or her love for granted. Her unwavering love is what brought her back to me after all these years.But,” he added with a hint of self-deprecation, “I can’t shake the feeling that I’m going to lose her again. You guys make fun of the two of us for being glued at the hip. You call it sappy or being whipped or romantic, but I don’t think it’s occurred to any of you that Ican’tlet her out of my sight. And the few times that I have to is agony.”

Demo looked at his friend in a new light. He’d always thought Bulldog was so strong, admired him for the way he took in Abby’s biological children as well as Lila and Cassie. But he hadn’t considered the toll it had taken on him. “Have you talked to your therapist about this?”

Abby, Bulldog, and Cassie telecommunicated with a therapist from Philadelphia. Demo had met her once at Abby and Bulldog’s wedding, but damn if he could remember her name. Lila saw a child therapist here in town, the same one that Bree also saw. Her name was Joanna and she shared an office space above the local bookstore with Jumper’s therapist, Dr. Rutenberg. Demo wasn’t sure if Bulldog still saw his therapist regularly or on his own, though he knew Bulldog joined Abby on some of her sessions when they wanted to discuss something with him.

“Oh, she’s aware. Dr. Skurja says my anxiety derives from a fear of losing her and guilt from not being able to protect her in the past.”

Demo wondered at the derision in his friend’s voice. “So you sit out here in pain while Abby’s only a few yards away behind a closed door because you want Abby to be happy and don’t care what that costs you?”

“Pretty much,” Bulldog nodded minutely. He glanced at Demo out of the corner of his eye. “I know what you have with Paige is new. I can’t give you advice about being in this stage of a relationship because I was neverinthis stage of a relationship. Abby was mine from the moment I laid eyes on her. There wasn’t a question ofif. Hell, I’m not even sure I gave her an option.” He let out a humorless chuckle. “But I can tell you this: figure out what makesherhappy and give that to her. Not what youthinkwill make her happy.”

He indicated with his chin towards the expensive computer on the reception desk.

Demo scratched the back of his neck self-consciously as he admitted, “I thought it would make her happy.”

Bulldog raised an eyebrow at him. “You thought she’d open up the computer box, jump up and down with joy, and then fall madly in love with you? Hate to break it to you, brother, but that’s cheating.”

Demo glared at him. “That’s not exactly how I saw it in my head,” he grumbled. Though it was so damn close, it was embarrassing.

Bulldog chuckled. “Relationships are hard work. It’s a give and take, almost like a dance. You need to listen to what it is sheactuallyneeds. Not whatyouthink she needs, which is actually about whatyouneed.”

Demo felt a headache coming on. His shoulder twitched uncomfortably. “You make it look so easy. All of you do. Hell, I’ve never seen any of you fight or have a disagreement. Angel and Cage are in this weird honeymoon phase where they seem to sense the other one before they even walk into a room. Jasmine and Jumper are busy planning their wedding. Lucky and Bear have knocked up their womenagain.And you and Abby have, like, merged into this single organism that defies the laws of physics.” He shrugged. “I think… Or maybe IhopedI’d found my happily ever after with Paige. She’s amazing, Bulldog.” Demo couldn’t keep the smile off of his face. “I swear, I’m kicking myself for her being right under my nose this whole time.”

“You didn’t see the behind the scenes of all of us,” Bulldog told him. “You didn’t see the struggles each of us faced to get our women. You saw the glamor shots, the final cut. I guarantee you, Abby and I fight.”

Demo’s jaw dropped. “What? You do?”

Bulldog nodded. Demo saw his beard twitch with a smile. “It’s not big, shouting matches that result in blood being spilled, but we have our disagreements. Every couple does. Those who don’t probably have underlying problems that they aren’t dealing with. Most recently, Abby and I argued about whether we should push Cassie into going outside more. She does well the few times she’s been off property and Abby thinks we should continue to encourage that. I think we should wait untilCassiesays she’s ready.”

Cassie had agoraphobia and often had difficulty leaving her own house to walk to the clubhouse down the path. She’d attended Bulldog and Abby’s wedding at the beach last October, but she’d struggled. Aside from the wedding itself, she had remained in her hotel room most of the weekend.

“Don’t look so surprised. Abby’s fierce when it counts,” Bulldog said with a level of love Demo could only hope to one day have. Maybe with Paige. “My point is, relationships, even the ones with an instant connection, are hard work. They taketimeand you have to be willing to put aside your pride and preconceived notions to figure out what your partner needs.”

Demo glanced down the hallway. He didn’t hear or see Paige or Abby. Still, he lowered his voice to barely a whisper. “Even if Paige feels for me what I feel for her, she won’t do anything about it so long as she still thinks she’s married.”

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