Page 90 of Claimed By Desire

Lev looks between us and he’s clearly suspicious. “I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do about it, except let them kill me next time.”

“Adriano wants you to marry his cousin.”

There’s silence. He stares at Nat then looks at me. A smile breaks out across his face like he’s struggling to keep his mask on. “That’s funny. Real fucking funny.”

“Lev—“ Natalya starts, but he cuts her off.

“It almost sounds like you’re asking me to do the one thing you refused to dotwice. The one thing you nearly got this family ruined over,twice.”

Natalya goes white. “I’m sorry. It’s what Adriano wants.”

“You’re sorry? Is this real?” Lev looks at me and I stare grimly back.

“It’s real,” I confirm as gently as I can.

He howls with laughter. It’s scary and unhinged. Natalya flinches back like he’s about to strike her, and I step forward just in case he really is losing his mind.

But Lev only staggers sideways and doubles over with laughter.

“You two are fucking ballsy, I’ll give you both that.” He manages to get himself under control, but the grin splitting his face is terrifying. It’s like he’s using that to keep all the darkness on the inside.

I’m not sure what’ll happen if Lev decides to really let loose, and I don’t want to find out.

“I know this is messed up, but it’s our only option,” Natalya says, struggling to keep herself composed. I can tell that she’s cracking though. “Believe me, I don’t want this. If there were another way?—“

“You fucking marry him,” Lev roars at her. “Like you were meant to from the start.”

“Careful,” I say, hands turning to fists.

“Oh, fuck off, Alex. Like you have any moral standing here. You fucked my sister when you knew she was supposed to marry someone else and then you stole her away on her god damn wedding day.”

He’s not wrong, but that’s only looking at everything in the worst possible light. I take a deep breath to steady myself.

“It wasn’t a god damn whim. Don’t you get that?”

Lev cocks his head like a bird trying to understand graffiti. “Explain.”

“I’ve been into Natalya for a very long time. I’ve wanted her since we were kids. We’ve always connected, and what happened in Paris was just inevitable. We couldn’t have stopped it even if we wanted to, and trust me, I don’t think either of us wanted things to go as far as they have. But I don’t regret it one tiny bit.”

Natalya stares at me. She seems at a total loss, and I don’t blame her. I should’ve told her all this a while back, but it’s been inside of me and I haven’t been able to put it into words.

Now I understand. I’m in love with her and I have been since we were kids. I fought against those feelings because giving in would’ve made me a failure, and I couldn’t live with that, not back then.

I’m older and I know better.

There’s no such thing as perfection.

But life with Natalya is the closest I’ve ever gotten.

“Do you think I give a shit about that?” Lev asks. He backs away toward the door. “You’re asking me to marry a strange. You want to make me do what you couldn’t do.”

“I know it’s wrong.” Natalya’s crying now. Tears stream down her face and I fucking hate it. I want to comfort her, but that will only piss off Lev even more. “We both know it’s totally fucked up, but Lev, this is how you can end the war before it gets out of control. You can save lives.”

“Fuck saving lives.” His mask is totally gone now. His face is emotionless and flat, and the dead look he gives me sends a chill crawling down my spine. Lev is a terror, pure and simple. “And fuck both of you.”

He turns and goes. I start after him, but Natalya stops me. He clings onto my arm and buries her face in my shoulder, and I turn to her instead.

Her cries are wordless. She sobs and I hold her. I can’t tell her everything will be okay and I don’t pretend like I know how things will work out. But at least I hug her close and kiss her hair and stay with her, because in all this fucked up world, she’s everything to me now. Wife, mother, much more than that too.

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