Page 25 of Claimed By Desire

“I’m totally fine. I just must’ve eaten something off, that’s all. Probably the shrimp at that dress shop.”

“Irina housed that stuff and she didn’t get sick.” Bianca frowns at me and looks like she wants to say something, but only gives me a tight hug instead. “You’re going to be okay. I’ll be at the wedding, right? We’ll get through it.”

“Thanks for being nice to me,” I blurt out as I fight tears.

She grins, hugs me one more time, and gets back in the car.

All things considered, that outing wasn’t such a disaster. At least I faced my fears, saw my old friends again, and got a dress. Even if it’s my least favorite and has a puke stain.

I lied to Bianca though. I didn’t eat any of that shrimp, or anything that might’ve made me sick. My head’s spinning as I try to come up with some rational explanation, and only one possibility keeps coming to mind.

But I refuse to take that option seriously. At least until that evening when the nausea hits me again and I find myself sitting on the floor of my bathroom with my back to the wall staring at the ceiling and trying to remember when my last period was.

Because I’m late.

And not just a little late: I’mthree weekslate.

Ever since I went to Paris, my cycle’s been a little off. I think the travel time plus the emotional stress really messed with my body, and I’ve just been totally irregular ever since.

So when I flew back home and my emotions remained a total wreck, it didn’t really surprise me that my period was off too. I figured it’d show up sooner or later. It happens sometimes. It’s not good—but it happens.

For obvious reasons, I’ve had other things on my mind, which made it easier to accept all those really dumb rationalizations.

But now I feel like a moron for not taking this seriously sooner.

I go into full-on panic mode. I Google like an absolute maniac, which doesn’t help and makes me just think I have super pregnancy cancer or something, and I get desperate enough that I consider calling Maria or Irina for help.

Except the moment I call them is the moment the entire Bratva hears about my little predicament.

Lev can’t help—he’d kill me if he knew—and Bianca’s a total stranger and I’m marrying her brother in a few days, so that’s right out.

I’m so messed up that I nearly call Alex. I hold my phone and stare at his name on my screen, and I think about what he might say.

Then I throw it across the room, because screw that.

In the end, I find a nearby 24-hour grocery store, and sneak out of the house. That’s not easy—the place is normally guarded by a few of my father’s men—but they get a little lazy around midnight. I wait until I hear the snoring, then I slip out the back door, hop the wall, and slip down the alleyway.

My heart’s racing on the walk. My hands shake, and sweat pours down my spine. I keep thinking about Paris—about Alex touching me, about Alex kissing me?—

About Alex finishing between my legs.

More than once.

I loved it at the time. I’m not going to pretend like protection even occurred to me in the moment. But now I’m like, what the hell were we thinking? How did either of us think that was a good idea?

He knew I was going to get married when we came back home. Heknewand he still fucked me without a condom.He knew, and he still took the risk.

Now I’m left dealing with the fallout.

I’m left marking my ass alone to a grocery store at midnight to take a pregnancy test.

I’m the one that has to fix this nightmare, while he gets to keep on living his life as if nothing changed.

Rage builds me in as I find my way to the pharmacy section. I grab a little purple box of tests, pay for them at self-checkout, then hurry back into the public bathroom. I’m so mad I could scream as I lock myself in a stall and pray nobody comes to check on me as I rip open the box, take out a white stick, and get busy.

My heart’s hammering madly in my ears while I wait for the lines to change.

Someone should be here with me. I shouldn’t have to do this in some random public restroom in the middle of the night. Alex should at least know this is happening so he can help shoulder some of the stress.

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