Page 1 of Denial

Prologue

Jinx

GETTING TO PINE View after the storms and knowing this is now going to be where I live and build my life with the Phantom Bastards MC is something I wasn’t expecting to hit me as hard as it does. We’ve all been here before and what little we did see of the city made us so excited to move and get to know the place where we’d live, play, and work. I know I was excited as fuck and couldn’t wait to get here even though I know I’ll miss my family who will remain in Benton Falls. Now, seeing the city full of devastation and destruction fills me with a sense of pain and hurt because these people have lost so much and now they’re starting over just like the rest of us. Buildings have been destroyed and laying in crumbled heaps on the ground, spilling out into the streets. Homes are reduced to nothing while sentimental belongings litter the street, yards, and are destroyed. Instead of going to the clubhouse to settle in, I want to make my way out in the city and start helping everyone get their lives sorted out so they can rebuild, locate their belongings that can be saved, and anything else I can to help.

Our bikes roar through the city as the few people out working pause long enough to take us all in. Some of the men and women smile at us and give small waves while others go back to work and ignore us. From what I understand, no one in the city hates the club being here so I’m not sure why the people ignoring us are doing so now. Maybe it’s simply because they’re busy with cleaning up the city or because they’ve lost everything and are trying to do the best they can in the aftermath.

Even though we’ve been on the road for hours and I should be exhausted after spending time with my family before we left and then the ride, I’m wide awake and ready to work. I don’t want to get some rest in my room at the clubhouse, unpack, or do anything else because this city needs us. So, I want to get out here and start wherever I’m needed the most to get this destruction cleared up. No rebuilding can happen until all the rubble, debris, and trash is removed. Chrome said the mayor has issued a state of emergency for help, but with all the towns and cities that are in desperate need of assistance, it’s no surprise to find no one here helping the residents of Pine View. So, we’ll step up and get this shit taken care of. I’ll rest eventually and won’t push myself too hard so I don’t wear myself out too much.

I follow the bikes through the city and pull into the parking lot of the clubhouse that I’ll now call home. Parking up against the clubhouse second in line, I quickly shut off my engine as everyone else parks and Playboy pulls the U-Haul up next to the side of the clubhouse. I recognize the two Prospects who have been here since Vault and Valor moved to Pine View to start the club. They leave the clubhouse and wait for their President to give them orders on what to do. I know they’ve been out helping with the clean-up so I’m not sure why they’re here right now as I make my way over to Vault where he’s talking to them.

“Have you guys been helpin’ with the clean-up today?” I listen to him ask the guys as they stand before him.

“We have. Knew you’d be back soon so we came back to help you guys with whatever you need help with. The rest of the guys are still out workin’. Chrome asked me to let you know he’s at Hound’s right now and makin’ sure everythin’ is set there to open back up. There wasn’t a ton of damage to the garage, but what did happen has already been taken care of,” one of the guys answers Vault as he notices me standing just behind Vault.

“Jinx, this is Martin and George. They are about ready to hand over their Prospectin’ duties to a few guys we’ve vetted and know want to join the club. Martin will be goin’ Nomad once he’s patched in and leavin’ with the guys. All the paperwork and stuff has been taken care of and approved. Guys, this is Jinx. He’s the new VP of the club,” Vault says, introducing us as I hold out my hand for the guys to shake as I step up next to Vault.

“Nice to meet you both again. Vault, I wanna head out and see where I can start helpin’. I know we have a ton of shit to do here, but helpin’ the city out is important and that’s where I need to be right now,” I say, turning to face Vault as a few other guys walk up to us to find out what’s going on.

“I’m ready to head out as well. George and Martin, can you work on unloadin’ the U-Haul? The girls can let you know where everythin’ goes and the doors have been temporarily marked as to who they belong to. If you guys can just get all the boxes and totes into the proper rooms so the guys can unpack when they get a chance. The ol’ ladies and girls will be here to cook, clean, and do what they do. Stay out of their way if you know what’s good for ya. I’m sure you can remember what they were like when they’ve been here in the past. Have the three girls left already?” Vault asks the men before us as my dad steps up to my side with Killer and Slim.

“They have. All three of them chose to leave Pine View. They want to be somewhere else and I really can’t blame them I guess. But, this is home and I’m not about to leave my home when the people I’ve known all my life need me the most. Can we get back out there to help once everythin’ is unloaded?” George asks, his voice washing over me with how strongly he feels about this city and remaining here despite the destruction of the storms.

I can see why this man has lasted for five years in the club. It’s honestly a shame he doesn’t want to patch in and become a full member after putting in so much time and work to help the guys out. I suppose he had a life before the club moved here and I’m guessing he wants to get back to it. While I don’t know him personally, I hope he has a woman and kids to get home to because this man is a good one and he deserves to have something soft and sweet to go home to at the end of the day.

“Good. Yeah, you can go back out once everythin’ is unloaded. I don’t want the girls liftin’ a finger to unload the heavy shit. Don’t touch the bikes on the trailer. The owners will unload them. Did you make sure a spot in the barn was cleared out for King’s bikes?” Vault asks, in full President mode as the ol’ ladies make their way in the clubhouse and my eyes land on Hope where she trails in behind the rest of them.

She’s wearing one of her dad’s old tee-shirts that hangs down to her knees with a pair of sweatpants that are way too large for her. They obviously belong to one of us. Hope is all about being comfortable and doesn’t give a fuck what she looks like when she’s in comfort mode. Her hair is up in one of those messy knots at the top of her head and she’s half asleep as she walks into the clubhouse. Just before the door closes behind her, I watch as she turns her head and our eyes meet. I’m frozen in my spot as her bright blue eyes seem to go straight to my soul where she discovers all of my hidden secrets that I don’t want another person to know. It’s as if time is frozen and no one else is in the world except the two of us. When the door finally closes behind her, I’m free from the connection between the two of us.

Hope is a beautiful woman and she’s the only girl I’ve ever had a crush on in my life. She’s not just beautiful because of her looks though. Hope is an amazing woman who is sweet, loving, full of life, and so many other things I could stand here all day long and tell you about. However, her dad is a member of the club and one I respect. While I have wanted Hope for most of my life, she’s the one girl I can’t take that step with. No, I’m not afraid of Killer and what he’ll do to me if I go talk to him about being with Hope. Honestly, I don’t see him telling me no as long as I respect him and go about things the proper way. Killer will listen to me and realize everything he believes about me isn’t true. The only one who knows every truth about me is King and he hasn’t said a word to anyone. All because I asked him not to. No, I deny the fact that I want to be with Hope is because I’m not good for her. No one is. Too bad my heart won’t listen and still beats for her and only her.

“Okay. The Prospects are gonna unload the truck. King, when you’re ready your bikes can go in the barn to store. If you need to go in and rest after the trip here, go. Chrome made sure all the rooms are marked with who is stayin’ where. The only rooms not open belong to our new members. The Nomads have pulled out cots and other shit to put up in the game room here. They’ve vacated their rooms for the guys movin’ in already. Even the ones stayin’ are givin’ up their rooms for you to stay in while you’re here. There’s no real place to get started in town from what Chrome and the others have told me. Just find a spot and get to work,” Vault says, his voice commanding as we all stand and listen to him.

King makes his way over to Killer, my dad, and me. “You goin’ out or stayin’ here to help and get some rest?”

“I’m goin’ out. You need to rest?” I ask my best friend knowing he’s still not a hundred percent as I look him over after the long ride he just made here.

“I need to get off my legs for a while. They’re botherin’ me,” he states, disgust and anger lacing his voice as he looks down at his feet.

“None of that shit,” Killer growls, making King look up at him pain filling his eyes. “You’ve been doin’ a lot of shit over the last few weeks, Kingston. More than you have since the accident. I’m fuckin’ proud of you and every fuckin’ guy here is too. You need to fuckin’ rest, so go do that shit. There’s more than enough to take care of here in Pine View for you to get your chance to help. I want you in bed for a nap before you get somethin’ to eat. Don’t think you can fool me into believin’ you’ve been eatin’ the last few days. Been watchin’ over ya and know you need to eat more. Your mom and aunt will be on your ass if you don’t get in and lay down. Don’t know about you, but I don’t wanna go up against either one of those women.”

We all laugh because Killer isn’t wrong. All of the ol’ ladies in the club are scary as fuck when they need to be. If Kim and Gwen believe King isn’t taking care of himself, they’ll do whatever is necessary to make sure he eats, sleeps, and rests his body when it’s needed. Honestly, I’m more scared of Kim than I am Gwen. Kim is a badass woman and I’ve seen her bitch out grown ass men to the point they cry and race away from here with their tail tucked between their legs. I walk my best friend in the clubhouse and make sure he goes straight up to his room before walking back out to find Killer the only one in the parking lot now.

“Everyone headin’ out already left and I waited for you,” he informs me, his voice less commanding than normal as he looks me over with that keen eye of his that doesn’t miss a single thing. “Told your dad I’d work with you. Chrome sent me a location that needs to be worked on. No one’s gotten there yet and it’s in bad shape.”

“Okay. King’s in bed. Made sure he went there and didn’t stop for any reason. His mom watched us walk through the clubhouse so I’m sure she knows how he’s feelin’. Kim doesn’t miss much when it comes to her kids,” I inform Killer because he does worry about King like everyone else.

With a nod of his head, Killer turns from me and heads for his bike. Shaking my head slightly because Killer is never gonna give me permission to be with Hope unless I get the balls to talk to him and I continue to find excuses not to. I follow his lead and make my way to my bike. I’ve got a custom bike that King helped me build from the ground up. I painted it a deep, dark red that a few of the guys tease me about. They like to point out that it reminds them of the highlights Hope started putting in her hair a few years ago. Maybe it does match, but that wasn’t necessarily my intention when I painted my ride. Pushing thoughts of Killer and Hope from my mind, I follow Killer as we leave the compound and slowly make our way through the city.

Killer and I have been working for hours. We’re both covered in dirt, grime, and so much shit I don’t want to even think about. I’m exhausted and my entire body is killing me. Still, I push through the pain and continue working next to Killer who is finally starting to slow down slightly. This man doesn’t know the meaning of the word break or how to slow down. Once he puts his mind to something, nothing gets in his way.

As I step back so Killer can move a large piece of cement that’s been broken, I hear the faintest whimper coming from behind me. It’s an alleyway that used to have a building on either side of it. Now, the ground is filled with the cement and brick that made up those buildings to block the entrance of the alleyway. Giving the area my complete attention, I listen as once again the whimper breaks through the silent air now that Killer has gotten the cement into the dumpster and stopped moving to wipe the sweat from his eyes.

“Killer, do you hear that?” I ask him, moving closer without turning to face the man with me.

“Hear what?” he returns, his voice getting closer to me as the whimper comes once again.

“Help!” I hear a muffled scream that sounds as if it’s coming from below the ground we’re in front of