Page 51 of Hockey Heart

The look on my face must have been a sight because, for once, she didn’t make any quips or shrug her shoulders. She just squeaked back at me.

“She spilled her drink, made quite a mess of that lovely dress. So, I guess she left?”

It was then that Andrea Barker bumped into Cara’s chair as she walked behind her. Andrea’s full glass tumbled over Cara’s head, leaving her looking like a drowned and astonished rat as she screeched in horror.

“Oh, I’m terribly sorry,” Andrea said unconvincingly as she walked away.

The busy little man in the oversized suit then scuttled up to the side of me. “Mr. Raynor, a photo with the Mayor please.”

I snarled at him as I thrust the award down on the table, “Not now.”

Then I was striding out of the building.

29

STUMBLING

Sarah

I was devastated. The once perfect dress was ruined and my make-up had quickly followed it into oblivion. Once again, I’d tried to step into that other world, finding out very quickly that I wasn’t wanted there. That I didn’t fit. Humiliated, I’d run straight out of the entrance and away from it all.

All I wanted was to feel was something that wasn’t this.Anythingthat wasn’t this. That wasn’t Hayden or Cara or Mayors or balls or my complete shame.

Outside, the hem of the dress crumpled against the dirty street as I chased down the first cab I saw with tears streaking down my face. Climbing inside and collapsing on the backseat, I groaned out in wild, mad agony. The cab driver gave me an odd look through his rearview mirror, before I found a ridiculous fake smile and gave him my address.

I couldn’t face going home to my empty apartment, though. What would I do there? Wallow and relive thatfucking moment over and over again in my head? So, when I saw the first green neon lights of a bar, I told the cab driver to turn off.

The night had gotten humid and sticky after the recent rains, and The Jackalope looked lively as we pulled up. Men in denim and leather hung outside in groups under the neon lights, sipping on cold beers and sucking on warm cigarettes, while rock n’ roll splashed out onto the pavement with every swing of the faded red door. It was as good a place as any.

An hour ago, I’d attracted admiring looks, but now I only received odd looks as I stepped out of the cab in my disgraced fancy dress. My heels crunched on the gravel as I walked up to the bar and stepped inside the raucous atmosphere of revelry.

People were yelling to each other loudly over the music, dancing wildly in the crowded space, the sound of pool balls echoing from one corner and wild laughter bouncing off the walls from another.

The lone barman was half-drenched in sweat, red-faced, and busy, but he gave me a warm, welcoming smile as I pushed my way up to the bar.He was cute, I thought to myself as I smiled back, trying to push everything else from that night out of my mind.

“Hey, so what can I get ya?”

Usually, I would’ve gone for a cold beer, but that wasn’t enough tonight. I didn’t want to be slow and introspective. I needed to shake things loose or else end up wallowing in my own misery.

“Tequila. Will you do one with me?” I shouted over the rattle of music.

“Sure!” He replied, grabbing a bottle and setting two long shot glasses down between us.

“What we toasting to?” He asked as he picked up his glass and leaned in closer.

“Um… How about …Being a big fucking disaster?”

“Done!”

We downed the shots, the tequila hitting my throat and making me gag, before I thankfully sucked on the accompanying slice of lime.

“And now?” The bartender asked. Slamming his glass upside down.

“Another!”

He laughed. “Okay then, but I’ll sit this one out.”

I pouted back at him, making him roll his eyes.

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