Page 45 of Hockey Heart

“I guess that didn’t go… well?” Kensy asked.

My phone pinged. It was Bernard.

Haven’t heard from you in a while. Dinner at mine later?

“Let’s just get out of here, Kensy,” I told her.

As I unlocked my phone, Hayden’s Instagram flashed up. There was a newly tagged post from@hotttbunnygirl, the two of them grinning as she splayed across his knee in a bar. Below was the commentLove my Hellraiser, followed by several skulls, aubergines, and fire engine emojis. Whatever picture they were painting, it made my mood darken even more.

I’d let myself get carried away, and I hated myself for it. Ididn’t fit into this world of glamorous influencers, models, and bunnies. I barely even fit into my own world of grubby kids, sad teachers, and cheap wine. Hell, I was the kind of person who couldn’t even afford a car, having my best friend driving me around instead.

My sadness turned into annoyance, then to anger, which quickly gathered pace as I let my feelings bubble up. Since Hayden Raynor had arrived in my life, things had been getting worse and worse. I had to let it go, before I spiraled any further into my own personal quagmire.

26

CLEANING HOUSE

Hayden

Goddamn Cara! I was sick of her coming in and messing up everyone’s lives. To hell with it. She had to go. For me, for Maiden, for Solly, and whoever else was caught up in her twisted shit.

As I slammed the front door and threw my keys on the table, she came drifting into the lounge in her silk gown like some kind of sexy ghost, accessorized with a martini in her hand.

“Oh, well, hey there, Hay-Ray.”

I scowled back at her.

“Cara, I need you to get your annoying ass out of here.”

“Aw, you used to like my annoying ass Hay Ray,” she pouted back at me with a soft, seductive lisp.

Jesus. She thought she could seduce her way out of anything. Not that she was wrong, exactly. There’d been enough times when I was completely done with her and she had lured me into bed. That spell had gone a long time ago, though. Now she’d lost that power over me, she just threatenedme with losing Maiden, or the house, or creating one of her tornados of gossip. It didn’t matter to her if any of it was true or not. As long as she got what she wanted, and I was just another worm on her hook.

“I’m not kidding Cara.”

Her expression shifted to one that said she was bored with this and wasn’t interested in playing this game. “Oh, don’t be so serious Hayden. I’ll be out of your hair in a day or two.”

“No,” I told her, defiantly.

In return, she laughed at me, making me even more angry.

“Hay-Ray, here’s the thing,” she slinked up to me and put her fingertips on my chest, looking up into my eyes. “You’re afuckingcoward.”

I stared back at her, gritting my teeth, deciding whether or not to just pick her up and throw her out through the window.

“It’s been seven years since I walked out on you. Aside from Maiden, and whatever’s going on with that Joyce woman, I’m still the only person you can feel anything for. You know why?”

My eyes thinned in simmering contempt at that awful woman. Her eyes were shining back at me, enjoying inflicting her little piece of torture on me. “Because the big scary hellraiser is just a scared little boy.”

“Get out!” I yelled, pointing to the door, but she just kept looking at me with the acrid smell of vodka on her breath.

“Look. I’m selfish and mean and I get what I want, Hayden, but at least I’m honest about it. You’re hiding in this little fortress you’ve built, telling everyone you’re protecting your kid, but really you’re trapped in here with no one but yourself.”

I sighed wearily. I didn’t need a lecture from Cara, of all people. She knew exactly what to say to twist the knife deep into you. Perhaps in some ways, she was right, though.

“All that bravado and you can’t even be brave enough to let anyone near you. Like that teacher you seem so obsessed with.” I blushed and gave her a dirty look. She really knew how to get under my skin, but how did she know about Sarah?

“Oh Hay-Ray, look at you,” she started playing with my collar, like a fussy mother. “Take some advice, even though you don’t want it. Let yourself be happy.”

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