Page 94 of Gracefully Yours

CHAPTER23

Charlotte

Wrapping paper littered the floor as a Christmas playlist pumping through the speakers, switching from Ariana Grande’sSanta Tell Meto the ever popular Michael Bublé Christmas album. We’d let the boys have some input, and their taste wasn’t the worst. With some things.

Although dinner was still cooking in the oven, we had gathered in the living room with hot steaming mugs filled with more liquor than intended, alongside a plate of cookies.

Because of that, I’d laughed harder than I had in weeks.

Taking another sip of my drink, I let the warm liquid settle against my belly, savoring the feeling. “I can’t drink another cup of this, or I’m going to bedrunk,”I sang the last word for emphasis. Ah, to be a lightweight.

“Just one more!” Noelle protested, poking at my side. “Besides, you haven’t even let us know how the wedding night went.”

“Oh, god. We’re not talking about this.” I said, cheeks pink with embarrassment.

“Come on, you gotta give ussomething,” Gabbi elbowed me, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Who was it I recall asking everyone else to stay out of her business?” I said, crossing my arms as I glared at my brunette best friend. We all seemed to share that exact trait: not wanting to talk about our own sex lives, but absolutely loving to get the dirty details about someone else’s.

“I second that. I don’t want to hear about mybrother.” Angelina wrinkled her nose. “Especially not how he is in the bedroom.”

The guys were still in the other room, now playing fetch with Brownie. Or… trying, because our brand-new, eight-week-old puppy wasn’t exactly good at bringing the toy back once they’d thrown it.

But our guys were stubborn, so they kept trying anyway.

“Thanks,” I said, giving a small smile of appreciation to Angelina. At least she had my back.

“But how was it? Was it everything you thought it would be?” Noelle whispered, and I couldn’t help but recall the last few nights in Daniel’s arms.

I leaned my head back against the headrest of the couch, staring up at the ceiling. Honestly, I’d always imagined that when I lost my virginity, I’d have told my friends that it happened,whenit happened. They’d even joked about getting me a cake to celebrate the occasion.

It was never something I was ashamed of, or felt like I needed to remedy. It just was. And because I’d kept it from them, well… Now I just felt guilty. It felt like an eternity had passed since Angelina’s wedding. Since I’d saidfuck itand experienced a night of pure passion with my best friend. A night that had turned into… this. A ring on my finger, a marriage pact fulfilled.

And maybe it was because of all thejust sexwe’d been having, toeing the line between something physical and casual and… whatever was happening between us.

That somehow, this fake marriage agreement was feeling less fake by the day, especially when I was living in his house and spending every second in his presence. I couldn’t admit that to any of them. Not while they thought this rouse of ours wasreal,instead of a marriage pact agreed upon out of desperation.

Because I was too chicken to admit that I might have been feeling things for my best friend. Better to stay in this territory of fake marriage and sweaty nights than to admit anything else.

Right?

“It was…” I blushed furiously. I’d always been like this, but it didn’t stop me from readingfilthysmutty romance novels or straddling my best friend slash fake husband the other night. But talking about it… “Honestly, I didn’t really know what to expect the first time. Everyone always said their first time was bad. But…” It wasn’t. And I’d been lying to myself for months trying to prevent it from happening again, because I knew what would happen if I admitted to myself how right it felt. How incredible we were together. “It was perfect.”

The wedding night. Daniel. Every minute since we’d said I do. All of it had been utterly perfect, and completely devastating to my heart.

How was I going to survive without falling madly, hopelessly in love with him?

“That’s what it’s like when you’re with the right guy,” Noelle said, giving me a knowing wink. “Sure, romance novels romanticize it, but…” She sighed dreamily as she looked at Matthew. “It’s better when you love them, too.”

Did I? It was too soon for that, wasn’t it? He was my best friend, so of course Ilovedhim, but like that? Was I alreadyin lovewith Daniel? I didn’t think so.

I still got butterflies whenever he smiled at me, when he called me darling, and when he looked at me with that heated gaze, but… Love?

Honestly, if I wasn’t already, it wasn’t that far off. He’d been my best friend since 18. I’d loved him as my best friend since then, even if this feeling, this new pounding in my chest, was completely new.

Not that I could admit that. Because they all thought we were married for love. Not some fake marriage pact from college, or that I’d been lonely, and he’d agreed to start a family with me.

“So glad your man’s an official member of the Book Boyfriends now,” Gabbi said, referencing the guys’ group chat they had without us. We’d gotten the idea to rename it one day, and after a grand heist (also known as Gabbi stealing Hunter’s phone), it was set in stone. I think they all knew if they changed it, we’d just change it back.

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