Page 67 of Gracefully Yours

But now that I was getting married… Somehow they wanted to be a part of my life again? It made me frustrated and upset, and I didn’t like how I felt when I was angry. It twisted up my insides, and the person I became just wasn’t me.

Yet I was here, playing the part of the dutiful bride, because that was how it always was in this family. I’d be the perfectly poised daughter my mom wanted, and when I got home, I’d take a long shower and try to figure out how I could never live up to their expectations.

“Oh my god! I can’t believe my little sister is getting married!” Lavender smiled, giving me a brief nudge with her elbow as I sipped on the champagne from my flute.

I gave her a small smile. “Thanks, Lav.”

It wasn’t Lavender’s fault that she was my mom’s favorite, and I would never trade my older sister for the world. But sometimes it felt like whenever I was around her, I came in second place. Lavender was a model. She’d married a successful lawyer, and now she was pregnant with her second baby. I hated feeling like I could measure up.

Sure, it was part of the reason I’d stopped going home years ago. The way my mom made everything between us into some competition. Never mind that I loved teaching dance, had my own successful business selling dresses and dance costumes, and that I was marrying an engineer.

Sure, there were some things they didn’t need to know. Namely, that my marriage was fake, and I’d moved out of my apartment because the rent was astronomically high.

“You okay?” Noelle slid in next to me, swapping out my empty glass for a full one.

I tried to force my face into a smile. This wasmybridal shower, and sure, my marriage might not have been real, but it was the only one I was going to have. “Yeah.” I tilted my fresh glass up, taking a sip. This occasion called for it. “Just thinking, I guess.” I leaned my head against my best friend’s shoulder.

“Promise me something,” she murmured as I surveyed the crowd in attendance.

“Anything.” I meant it.

“Let’s do something alittlemore low-key for my bridal shower, please?”

I giggled. “You mean you don’t want a champagne fountain?”

“Char,” she groaned.

“I promise.” I dropped my voice into a whisper. “I think she only did this because she’s upset I wouldn’t let her plan my wedding. The thought of a backyard wedding on Daniel’s dad’s property… It’s a bit scandalous for myhigh-societymother.” Never mind that I’d grown up in California, not New York. Or that we weren’t heiresses to a giant fortune. She’d still carried those roots with her, even after marrying my Silicon Valley-based father.

“I think outdoor weddings are perfect.” Noelle sighed. “We’re touring some pumpkin patches nearby for our wedding next fall, and I can’t imagine us doing anything else.” Her eyes fluttered shut as she smiled, like she was imagining it.

“As long as we don’t have to carry pumpkins with our bridesmaid dresses, you know I’m down for anything.” I looped an arm through hers. “Now, do you think we can escape before the games begin?”

“With your mom?” She rolled her eyes. “Unlikely.”

“We should probably go rescue them, huh?” Angelina and Gabbi were stuck in a conversation with some of my relatives. My fellow instructors from the dance studio, luckily, were all sitting around another table, just chatting.

“Yes. Definitely.”

“When do you think Hunter and Gabbi are going to get engaged?” I murmured to Noelle, watching our brunette friend loop her arm through Angelina’s and head towards the food table. Freeing themselves.

“I’ll tell you one thing… If Hunter's anything like Matthew, he’s going to make it special when he does. And they’ve only been dating for a few months. What’s the rush?”

What’s the rush, Charlotte?

I looked down into my drink as we headed over to reconvene with our friends.

The question echoed through my heart, bumping around a few times like a pinball machine before settling in my gut, a heavy weight I couldn’t quite explain.

What was the rush? Why had I been so eager to sayyes?

To rush into a fake marriage in the first place?

Was I that desperate for a family of my own?

But I knew, deep in my heart, that the answer wasyes.

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