Page 34 of Gracefully Yours

I decided it was finally time to talk about the topics we’d been avoiding.

“Well… we need to talk about ground rules. And… um…” My face flushed. “What happened at the wedding.”

He set the tape down, turning to look at me. “When we had sex?”

“Yeah… that. We were both drunk, and I think we can both agree it’s not a good idea. So maybe we should… not.”

Bending to put another blanket in my box—I was always cold, so my blanket collection was quite expansive—I didn’t notice him approaching behind me. Not before his arms wrapped around my middle. “And why, exactly, is it a bad idea,darling?”

I flushed. “You know why.”

He pressed his body into mine, and I could feel him against my backside, already half-hard. I almost moaned as he rubbed against me. “I don’t. Why don’t you enlighten me?”

“Because we almost ruined e-everything,” I said as he bent me over the couch.

“Did we?” He chuckled, the sound going straight through me as he nipped at my ear. “I think everything is turning out just the way it’s supposed to. You’re going to be my wife.”

“Wecan’t,” I croaked out. I couldn’t explain my hesitation, not without giving up all the cards I held to protect my heart. “And I don’t… No kissing. No PDA.”

“I’m going to kiss you, Charlotte. Married couples do kiss, you know.” He kept me pressed against the couch, my hands gripping the top of my pillows.

I swallowed roughly as he crowded in next to me. “But we don’t need to, um… in private.” That seemed tooreal.Too intimate. And marrying my best friend because I couldn’t find anyone else seemed like the exact opposite of that.

“Besides, we’ve kissed before, haven’t we?” He brushed a hair back from my cheek.

“That was different.” I diverted my eyes away.

“Was it?”

Was it?Maybe. Maybe it wasn’t at all. Why had I asked him to kiss me in college? I was nineteen, and I still hadn’t kissed a guy.

But then… Why had I kissed him in August?

“Charlotte.” His voice was lower, softer, as he squeezed my thigh. “I want to kiss you. Okay?”

“Okay.” I breathed out, closing my eyes.

But he didn’t kiss me.

Not then.

He released his hold on me, letting me escape from between him and the couch, and it took a long time for my breathing to go back to normal.

Even longer for me to admit to myself that I’d wanted him to pin me down right there and claim me. That his breath against my ear had made me wetter than I’d ever been in my life.

That I was definitely not going to survive this fake marriage, if that was any sign.

* * *

“Happy Halloween!”Noelle smiled, her ginger locks held back with a purple headband and a green scarf tied around her neck over a purple dress. When I spotted Matthew in the living room, suddenly their costumes made perfect sense. Daphne and Fred fromScooby-Doo. Their hair colors already matched the characters, so it was perfect.

“Nice costume,” I smiled, passing by the dessert table as I followed Noelle back into the kitchen area of her and Matthew’s house. She was wearing her brand new sparkling engagement ring, which made me think of the one sitting on my bathroom counter.

“You should see Snowball. Matthew got her a Scooby collar and everything.”

I laughed, wondering if that was the type of thing Daniel and I would do with our dog one day. The thought was shocking, considering we hadn’t even told our friends our plan yet. And even though I knew we needed to—soon,I couldn’t help but stress over all of their reactions.

“I’m surprised you and Daniel didn’t come together.”

---