Page 58 of Gracefully Yours

He shook his head. “I’ll be here. Come find me if you need anything.”

“I will.” I nodded. “Thanks, babe.”

Every time I said it, it got a little easier. Felt a little less fake.

Maybe it was just the alcohol, but it didn’t feel strange at all. It felt like maybe, for once, all the puzzle pieces were falling into place.

Like there might be something more buried underneath all of this.

* * *

“Put me down,”I groaned, riding on Daniel’s back as we walked back to the house. “I’m heavy.”

After a few more hours of drinks, a scenery change to a new bar, and more dancing, we’d finally both called it quits. And the fresh air seemed like the best choice, so here we were.

“Char.” Even though I couldn’t see his face, his tone was rough. Commanding. “You’re light as a feather. I can carry you.” As if reassuring me, his fingers tightened on my thighs, and I sighed, wishing I could bury my face in his hair in embarrassment.

Not because his hair smelled like his shampoo, which was, frankly, delicious.

“Why did I drink that last cocktail?” I said, groaning. Clearly, I wouldn’t stop beating myself up about the fact that I was swaying on my feet and my best-friend-slash-fake-fiancé had to carry me back.

I certainly wouldnotthink about how I was all pressed up against his muscles while riding piggyback on him.

“You were having fun with your friends,” he chuckled. “That’s a good thing. I feel like I haven’t seen you let loose in a while.”

It was true—I’d been so stressed with everything. Planning a wedding, maintaining a fake relationship, on top of my two jobs. “Maybe you’re right,” I said, settling my head onto his shoulder. The warmth of his body was close to lulling me to sleep, but I was fighting to keep my eyes open. “It’s been a weird few months.”

Thankfully, I wasn’t completely drunk, but I had consumed enough alcohol to decrease my inhibitions. And I had a habit of confessing things I shouldn’t.

Or doing things I knew would change everything, like I’d done in August.

Sometimes I thought it was a mistake, but I didn’t regret it. I’d been worried it would ruin our friendship, but we were doing just fine now, right?

So why was I avoiding the tension between us? I’d seen how he looked at me. I knew what he looked like without a shirt on. Why didn’t I let myself indulge in it again?

“Charlotte,” he murmured, bringing me out of my trance-like state. “We’re back.”

I opened my eyes. When did I close them? His shoulder was comfortable, especially considering how fit he was.

“Oh.” I mumbled, sliding down off his back, every inch of me rubbing against him. Why did that send a rush through my body? It must have been the alcohol. That’s what I was choosing to blame it on, anyway.

Forgoing digging through my bag to find my pajamas, I flopped onto the bed, letting the mattress cup my body like a cloud.

Daniel sat down beside me, and it was his weight that reminded me of the last time we’d truly shared a bed.

“Daniel…” I started. “We should talk.” Sitting up, I spun the ring around my finger a few times, staring at the diamond. Reminding myself what we’d promised each other. Honesty.

“What’s wrong?” He looked concerned, even with his soft-spoken voice, looking at me like he thought I might break. Like what I was about to say mattered to him. Like, just maybe, he needed me to be okay.

Shit. Maybe I’d chosen the wrong words. When didwe should talkmean anything other thanwe should break up?And I didn’t want to break off our fake engagement. Even if it wasn’t real, at least I had him like this. At least I had my best friend.

“We promised we’d be truthful with each other and…” I shrugged my shoulders up, turning back to the window, not making eye contact as I watched the snow fall outside. Central Oregon really was a magical place in the winter. “There’s something you should know.”

“Yeah?”

“That night in Paris… that was my first time.” I bit my lip, wrapping my arms around myself.

Guess we were going with complete honesty now. I hadn’t even known I was going to say it till it came out, but I didn’t regret it. If we were doing this marriage pact right, it was the time for the truth. One at a time

---