Page 49 of The Puck Secret

I return her smile, the warmth of hers so familiar and safe that I feel like I want to cry. Diana was a vital part of my life. With parents like mine, and a brother mostly occupied by hockey, having someone like her around was like having a safe haven to escape into. She always looked after me, asked me questions about my day, helped me with homework, teased me about my crushes. Everything a real mother should do, I briefly think, and the tears threatening to spill start to sting. She hasn’t changed at all, sure she looks a little older herself, and she looks as if she has lost some weight, but apart from that she is still the same Diana.

“I’m good, Mrs Darkmore, how are you?” My manners overtake my personality, pushing me away from the emotion threatening to spill right here in the middle of the market, and she pops the bag of food onto her hip and glares at me. “Sorry, Diana, I’m doing okay thanks, how are you?” I add in a rushed ramble, feeling nervous for some reason, and she just laughs.

“Oh, Maddie, you haven’t changed a bit, have you dear?” Just as she asks that the server calls my name, my order ready, and I excuse myself for a second to grab it. When I return she glances down at the bags we are both holding. “I was just gonna head home and eat alone, but I would love some company.” She gestures to a nearby empty table under a small patio area, and I bite my lip nervously as she waits for me to answer.

In truth, I would love to have dinner and catch up with her for old times’ sake, hell, just to see how she is, and catch up, but I feel a little weird, and for once the problem isn’t my father.It’s her son.The one who just threw away months of texts with me so he could be with the other me, the one he doesn’t realize he already knows so well.

Despite that I can’t turn her down, not when it’s been so long, I’ve missed her. Which is why I find myself saying, “Sure, I would love to have dinner with you.” I hold my hand out to the table she gestured, letting her take a seat first, before I sit down across from her.

“So, how are you really?” she questions with a knowing smile. “How’s your brother? I’ve seen him play a few times, he’s doing amazing.”

Choosing the easier answer, I focus on my brother. “Josh is great, dominating and focused as always.” I roll my eyes playfully, she knows how great my relationship is with him. “He will be getting drafted next year, I’m going to miss him so much when he leaves.” She looks at me knowingly, seeing right through my attempt to avoid her question about myself, but before she can push me on it, I quickly add, “How’s Nova?”

I don’t know why I ask, it’s a stupid question, an even stupider notion to actually care, especially now I know what I know, but it’s been days since I have talked to him in any capacity and I have to know. Yet when her knowing smile morphs into confusion I mentally curse. “I didn’t realize you two knew one another,” she says slowly, and I curse myself again. Of course she thinks we don’t know each other. Until a few weeks ago we hated one another, or at least I thought we did, that shouldn’t have changed.Stupid stupid Maddie.

“We don’t,” I say too quickly, the two words not even sounding believable to my own ears, and I scold myself. “Not really anyway,” I add with a shrug. “I mean, he plays on the team with Josh, I see him around at parties and stuff.” I aim for my words to be casual, but I may as well be wearing a sign across my head that reads ‘I screwed your son’.

Diana watches me closely for a few seconds, no doubt searching my words for the lie they are, but thankfully she doesn’t seem to pick up on anything. “He’s doing well, he’s a good boy, always looking after me and making sure I’m okay. He cooks dinners with me, and helps me clean up. I struck gold with him” Her eyes go a little misty as she talks about him, and I am fascinated by her insight on him. Nothing like the cocky, alpha hole hockey player he portrays around campus, but I suppose given what I know now, that I was already aware of that.

You could stop most people in town and ask their thoughts on him and they’d all have something to say. He’s like my brother, thanks to hockey, everyone knows who he is, but their answers would all be the same. They would say what a great hockey player he is, how he will for sure be drafted into the NHL, and that he is one of the greats in the making. And they’d be right, he is, he will, but hearing someone talk about him as a person, about what he is like without a stick in his hand, it’s refreshing.

My mind rushes back over every text he ever sent, knowing most of them by heart considering I have reread them a hundred times in the last couple of days, and considering I can’t exactly agree with her, or add to her insight by telling her he gives great head. So, I say the only thing I can say without repercussion. “He’s a great hockey player.” Five words that sound so ridiculous that even I laugh a little as I say them, and it feels like Diana is seeing right through me, just like she always did, but she doesn’t call me out on it.

Instead, we spend the next hour catching up on the last few years. She asks me about the rest of my school years, how college is going, about the boy I had a crush on when I was thirteen, whose name she still remembers, and the yearly vacation we still take to the Hamptons every Summer, and the Bahamas every winter. She also catches me up on what she has been doing since leaving her position in my father’s office, and the guilt I feel is unmatched. I know it’s not my fault, but my father is the reason she lost everything, and the fact she isn’t holding it against me the same way her son once did is a miracle.

By the time we finish dinner and finally part ways, we have exchanged numbers and agreed to not go so long without talking again. Any tension I had from my earlier dinner has disappeared, along with the lingering guilt I had in relation to Nova’s mom, and my night actually turned out okay. I let Julian drive me the rest of the way home, greeting Hector on my way inside with a smile as they swap shifts, and when I head upstairs to shower, I feel lighter than I have in weeks.

I know the number of days until I lose my freedom is getting dangerously low, and I also know the rope around my neck will be so tight soon that I won’t be able to breathe. But right now I still have my freedom, and I plan to enjoy it one last time, afterall, I have a hockey game to look forward to.

It’s game day, and when Hallie and I pull into the parking lot of the hotel that the team is staying at, I can feel the anticipation of seeing Nova burning through me. I woke up this morning feeling reckless, and wild, and it was with that notion in mind that I dressed in some of the sexiest underwear I own, before tossing on one of Josh’s jerseys, some tight jeans, and my heeled boots. I feel good, and I plan to find Nova after the game and have him make me feel even better, just one last time.

“Archer said he would room with me to give you guys the whole night together,” Hallie cuts into my thoughts, her fingers firing across the keyboard of her phone as she talks. “I’m cool with it if you are.”

Climbing out of the car and moving to pull our bags from it, my neck almost snaps because I turn around to look at her that fast, “What? I’m not spending the night in his room, Hals,” I screech in outrage, as if we haven’t already spent the night in his bed together, but that was different. That was before I knew who he was, it can’t happen again. “This is strictly a friends with benefits situation,” I confirm, before adding, “No, an enemies with benefits situation, actually. There will be no room sharing or sleepovers.” We have to go back to the way things were before all of this, but even I can hear the lies in my voice, and my best friend just laughs.

“Again, you mean?” Hallie muses, popping her hip out to the side as she glares at me knowingly. “There will be no sleepovers again, because if my memory recalls, you already spent the night at Casa Darkmore.” Her smug smile is insufferable, and before I can call her out, I see my brother barreling towards us with a smile on his face.

“You made it,” he hollers, causing Hallie’s spine to stiffen, as he approaches us from behind. Of course, he tries to ignore her completely as he strides past her and pulls me into a hug. “I’m so glad you’re here, Mads.”

His words are bittersweet. I have never been to one of his away games before, and I feel guilty instantly. I mean, yes, of course I am excited and happy to watch my brother play, but if I am being honest, he’s not the reason I’m here. I’m here because Nova asked me to come, because in a rare vulnerable moment, he invited me and I couldn’t say no. A common theme occurring anytime he is around lately, but it makes me feel like shit for lying to my brother.

“Maddie, did you know I’m invisible now,” Hallie drawls sarcastically, as my brother ignores her presence completely. “I wonder what I can do with my new found magic.”

Now it’s Josh’s turn to stiffen, and I prepare for the bitterness and disdain between them just like always, as he pulls away and looks blankly at my best friend. “Sorry, Tink, I guess it’s easy to forget you’re here considering you haven’t grown since you were twelve.” I see Hallie’s eyes widen at the use of her old nickname, one neither of us has heard in years, and all I can do is stare.

“Not everyone can take steroids, Joshua, sorry it’s so lonely at the top,” she snaps back in a fluster, clearly feeling unnerved by him, and still I remain silent watching them.What the hell is going on?

My brother laughs, reaching out to ruffle her hair like he always used to when she was a child, as he leans in close to her with a smile. “Don’t worry about me, Tink, I’m never lonely for long,” he replies with a wink and a smirk, and she pushes him away with a shove.

“God, you’re so annoying!” she huffs, straightening out her hair from his light assault, and grabbing her bag from the car to place it on the floor with mine.

Josh doesn’t skip a beat, reaching down to grab them both, and slamming the trunk of the car shut for us as he goes. Then turning to walk inside of the hotel, but not before he tosses over his shoulder, “Trust me, Sanders, the feeling is mutual.”

The two of us watch him leave, before Hallie grumbles, “Well, that was a fun start to our game day road trip.”

I can’t help but laugh, looping her arm in mine and dragging her with me to follow my brother inside. She might have said it sarcastically, but I know she enjoys the back and forth banter with him. She may as well be our middle child at this point, and as I pull her inside, I look forward to what the rest of the day may bring. Go Flyers and all that.

After checking in, we grab a quick coffee with Josh before he has to rush off to the stadium, and then Hallie and I spend the next hour getting ready for the night ahead. By the time we make it to the stadium ourselves, it is already bursting with fans for both teams, and I wait until Hallie is settled into our front row seats, right next to the flyers area, before slipping away.

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