Page 30 of Judgments of Fire and Desire

I nodded again. Once I took off my gear, I went to our bunk. I didn’t feel like being social, especially not with Bransford. Lying in bed, I curled up in the fetal position and allowed the tears I had in a chokehold to fall down my cheeks. This was so hard, and I couldn’t wait until I was in a better position to handle it. I knew that would come with time… hopefully.

I pulled into the parking lot of Texas Roadhouse and just sat there. My mama invited me to dinner with her and Samuel, and I just wasn’t feeling it. A week had passed since Kyrie’s accident, and I hadn’t heard a word from him. I’d texted him, saying that I hoped he was okay, and nothing. That only made me feel worse. I felt so rejected. Maybe I’d imagined what I thought I saw in his eyes.

The past week seemed to be even harder than the previous two weeks, but I knew I had to get myself together. This wasn’t healthy. I could end up in a severe state of depression, and that was the last place I wanted to be. I had a reputation for being bubbly and always happy. I couldn’t let Kyrie’s rejection drag me to mentally dangerous places.

After applying lipstick and huffing loudly, preparing myself to deal with Samuel’s bullshit, I got out of my car and headed inside. My mama and Samuel were standing there, about to be escorted to a table. I hugged my mother then Samuel and followed them to a booth. I sat next to my mama, because I needed to be able to see Samuel’s face if he started with his foolishness. I was off today, but I’d been in the house with my grandmother, talking about things and doing laundry. I wasn’t sure what it was about laundry, but she enjoyed doing it.

“Mama, why didn’t you invite Grandma?” I asked her.

“I did, but she said she was going home and eat leftovers. She didn’t want to have to throw them away and today was the last day she felt it would be safe to eat it.”

She chuckled, and I did too. “She must still have some of that shrimp étouffée in her fridge. It has to be, what, three days old?”

“Girl, four. She’s pushing it for sure.”

We laughed as Samuel shook his head with a smile. Although he was quiet, he didn’t seem to be in a bad mood. He was just listening to us talk. Mama turned her attention to him and asked, “How’s work been, son?”

“It’s been somewhat busy, but nothing we aren’t used to. Seems like crime is on a steady incline in Beaumont. It’s discouraging.”

“I know it is. To say the city is much smaller than places like Houston and Dallas, it seems like the crime rate is comparable percentage wise.”

“Maybe with Dallas, but definitely not Houston.”

He chuckled, and we did too as the waitress came and took our drink orders. Once she left, Samuel asked, “So how have things been for you, sis?”

“They’ve been okay. I’m maintaining.”

“Has Kyrie reached out to you yet?”

I frowned slightly. “Why would he be reaching out?”

“Didn’t you help him when he got in that wreck? Knowing where it was, I was pretty sure y’all were first on the scene.”

“I did, and we were. I helped him, and he went on his way with the ambulance.”

“Come on, Genesis. I know you. You’re telling me you didn’t reach out to make sure he was okay?”

“I did, but I didn’t get a response. Now can we drop it?”

He lifted his hands in surrender and things got quiet. The waitress came back with our drinks and set them on the table, then took our orders. When she left, Samuel said, “I didn’t mean to upset you, sis. I apologize. You do know that I just want what’s best for you, right?”

I took a deep breath. “I know that, but only one person knows what’s best for me, Samuel, and that person is me. Well… and the Lord. So, I think He and I have everything under control.”

“Okay. Enough of that, you two. Samuel, what are you going to do for your twenty-fifth birthday? We’re two months away.”

“Probably nothing. We’ve been working quite a bit of overtime lately. After working, the only thing I want to do is go home and sleep. Like, when we leave from here, I’m going home and hop in the bed. I’m gon’ slide to my pillow like it’s home plate.”

Mama and I laughed. “I feel you, brother. I was like that last week. Although we only had two call outs, we stayed busy with classes and cleaning equipment. The bunks are comfortable but not as comfortable as my bed at home. When I got home yesterday morning, I slept nearly the whole day away.”

He chuckled and nodded. “I suppose that’s the life of a first responder.”

I nodded as my mama smiled. “I’m proud of both of you.”

The waitress came back with our food as Samuel’s dispatch thingy went off. He rolled his eyes and dropped his head back to the booth. “I gotta go, y’all. Mama, can you box this food up for me, and I’ll pick it up from your house later?”

“Of course.”

He pulled out his wallet and dropped a hundred-dollar bill on the table. “Dinner is on me. Love y’all.”

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