Page 2 of Deceit

I ride up and down every single street in ways I don’t typically do. When I’m out on my sport bike, I prefer to go faster and am testing myself each and every time I ride. Tonight, I’m keeping my ride nice and slow as I try to find any sign of this girl. The only time I stop is to get gas and something to drink before taking off and riding again. I know I could go back to the clubhouse and search the cameras placed around the city for the rider, but I feel as if that’s cheating because I’m not actually putting in the work to find out who she is in person.

The sun’s just starting to come up as I turn my bike and head back toward the clubhouse. I’ve ridden up and down every single street in this city and there’s no sign of the girl or a sport bike I haven’t seen out on the road countless times since moving here. I’ve actually met up with a few people and we’ve gone out for rides together. It’s not something I necessarily like, but it’s nice to have someone with you every now and then. So, if I hear about a bike night or something like that, I take off and go for a ride as long as the club doesn’t need me. No one says anything because it took me forever to even think about getting back on either one of my bikes. I will never be able to thank my dad and uncle for the push they gave me when I needed it the most.

Chapter Two

Brynn

EVERYDAY IS THE samefor me. I get up and clean my house before grabbing breakfast. Once breakfast is done and I’ve washed the dishes, I take my shower and get ready to head to Turn the Page. The last few days I have been focusing on working and not reading all the books in the store that I want to buy to expand my library instead of leaving them on the shelves for other customers to purchase and take home. The story I’m working on is completely consuming me to the point I dream about upcoming scenes when I go to sleep each night and can’t wait to get back to writing. However, at the same time I’m distracted while I sit in the same chair in Turn the Page, waiting for the biker to show back up. He told me he doesn’t give up when he sees something he wants and supposedly he wants me. I’m not sure what’s going on, but he hasn’t been back to the book store since our initial meeting and it’s kind of disappointing.

No, I haven’t changed my stance on dating bikers at all. I don’t want to be with a man who has temptation in front of him every second I’m away. Those women are fucking crazy and will go to any lengths to get what they want. Most of the time it’s becoming an ol’ lady to one of the members and they prefer officers over fully patched members with no official position in the club. I’ve known these women to poke holes in condoms, telling any single woman entering the clubhouse that certain men are off limits, and so many other vile things to get a woman who’s never been around a club to back off and leave the guy she likes alone. Even after all the years my parents have been together, I would see the newer club bunnies back home try to get between my dad and mom. They don’t understand my parents are in love and no one will ever get between that love.

My brother is going through the shit right now. He’s been dating the same girl since high school and she’s dealt with every imaginable scenario when it comes to the club bunnies. They’ve even pushed her into the corner of the bathroom and started beating the hell out of her. I found that situation playing out and made sure to end it. Maddox still doesn’t know what the hell is going on with Amara, his girlfriend, and I’m not going to be the one who loses her trust in me by telling him. Maddox needs to figure out what the hell he wants and make things right with Amara if he truly loves her the way he says he does. The last time I was home, I could sense Amara getting ready to leave my brother and he has no clue. I know something is going on with her, but I don’t know the details. It’s because I’m a lot younger than she is. I’m good enough to help get the club bunnies away from her, but not good enough to confide in. It’s always been that way with everyone in my life and I’m kind of tired of it.

I let my thoughts wander to everyone I’ve ever had in my life. With me being the ‘oops baby’ I get coddled and don’t get told the most important information because people think I’m too young to handle the truth of any situation we’re put in. That’s so far from the truth that I can’t stand things going the way they are. It’s one of the major reasons I’ve left home to be on my own. In Pine View I can make my own decisions and not have someone tell me I’m too young to understand anything. Every single day I make decisions I’ve never been allowed to make on my own before. I get that my parents want to protect me from things, but they can’t. This world is an evil place and I will always see, hear, and experience things I shouldn’t because of various circumstances. The thing my parents, especially my dad, doesn’t understand is that no one will ever be completely protected from the horrible parts of life. I experience that shit every single day and no one knows about it.

Over the last month, I’ve randomly found items, pictures, and shit like that at my house after being gone all day long. There have been dead roses left in a box on my porch with a typed note that I belong to someone and they’re just waiting for the right chance to take me. Other notes have brought up different things I’ve done during the day—where I’ve been, what I’ve had to drink or eat, people I’ve talked to. The day I met the biker in Turn the Page, I got a scathing note about what a slut I am for talking to a man and giving him the smile reserved for whoever is leaving me all the notes and shit. I’ve upgraded my security system at the house and then got a note that it wouldn’t keep them out—nothing will keep us separated once all of their plans are in place and they’re ready to take me home where I’ll live with them forever. It’s very creepy and I know I should bring in my family, but they have no reason to come to Pine View. Right now, this is nothing I can’t handle so I’ve opted to ignore the shit and just keep adding it to the pile of shit I’ve been given over the last month.

I’ve got a tote that’s on the smaller side. Every single time I find a note, package, or pictures, I put on a pair of gloves and bring all of the items in and seal them off to be dealt with at a later time. When the security system was upgraded, I stayed home when the company came over to install it and nothing seemed out of place. However, I can’t help but think that one of the men doing the installation is my stalker. Yes, I fully recognize them as a stalker at this point in time. They know way too much about my daily life to be anything but a stalker. If things get any worse, I’ll call my dad or grandpa to come help me with the problem. I’m just trying to wait until the very last minute before I bring them in. This is because I know they’ll take over and my dad will move me back home in the blink of an eye once he learns about what I’ve been dealing with.

Shaking my head, I let my thoughts turn to the rider I ran into a week ago. When I can’t sleep at night, I tend to go out riding. I know it’s not the best decision to make with everything going on in my life, but it’s the only way I can keep the nightmares at bay. See, I went through something no one knows about and if my family ever found out, I’m not sure how they’d react. Anyway, I ride because I can’t stand to be in the house alone after a nightmare and it brings me a sense of peace and freedom those nightmares rip away from me.

The same thing happened a week ago and I was out riding through Pine View. I stay within the city limits when I ride in the middle of the night. There are too many things that can go wrong if I get on the highway and no one knows I’m riding. If my stalker is following me, it would be the perfect place to get me and take me away where no one can find me. So, I try to prevent that shit from happening. There are just enough people still in the city no matter what hour you’re out to keep my stalker from getting his hands on me.

After seeing the biker and knowing they were trying to catch up to me, I ended up racing home and hiding my bike in the garage I have at the side of the house. I stripped out of my riding gear in there and carried everything inside the house to put up where it belongs. In a matter of hours I heard the familiar sound of a sport bike slowly riding down my street and knew deep in my soul it was the person who tried to catch up with me. I’m a lone rider and don’t go to bike meets or anything else. While I know I can handle riding my bike in almost any situation, you never know what’s going to happen on a group ride and I’ve seen videos of people crashing because they try to keep up with more experienced riders and all sorts of shit. So, I prefer to ride on my own and not have someone else push me past my comfort level to prove some kind of point or other bullshit like that.

I try to force those thoughts out of my head because nothing will ever come of them. The biker will never find me because I’ve gotten really good at covering my tracks over the years. So, two different bikers have made an impression on me and nothing will come with either one of them. One is in a club and so full of himself that he hasn’t had the balls to show back up after his strong words to me. The other is a sport bike rider who will forget about me the second something new and shiny grabs his attention. No, not all sport bike riders are like that, I just have a feeling he’s a guy who can’t make up his mind and there’s nothing I will ever do to convince him otherwise. I’m not the girl the guys want on their arm because they’re in a relationship with. I’m the girl who’s every guys’ best friend and is there to do things with when no one else is available to hang out. That’s why I’m truly not surprised to discover the biker has never made a second trip to the book store.

It's easy to accept that I’m never going to be good enough for a guy like that biker. My own family doesn’t treat me as if I’m good enough. I’m not saying they don’t love me or anything like that because I know they do. It’s always felt as if I’m an afterthought. It’s probably because I’m an oops baby and wasn’t planned. The age difference doesn’t help either and I know it’s a matter of time before I end up breaking down and letting my family know exactly how I’ve felt all these years. I’ve felt like saying something so many times over the years and have always held back. I don’t want to give my brother and sister more ammunition to use against me.

As I continue to sit in the book store, I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket and pull it out to see my grandma’s name flashing on the screen. With a smile on my face, I answer the call after making sure no one’s around me.

“Mimi, how are you today?” I ask, answering my phone as I allow the last of my negative thoughts fade to nothing while trying to put on a brave face so I don’t sound upset.

My grandma, or Mimi as I’ve always called her, is a force to be reckoned with. She knows when any of us is having a bad day or going through something and doesn’t drop it until she knows every single detail about what’s going on. Honestly, I’m surprised she didn’t know about the bullying at school before my grandpa because I withdrew even more when it started to get really bad.

“I’m missing my favorite girl something fierce. Are you coming home for a visit anytime soon, Brynn?” she asks me, a light tone to her voice even though I know she truly means she misses me a lot.

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