Page 38 of Outcast

I jumped, spinning around. "Jesus Christ! You scared the shit out of me!" I pressed a hand against my chest, willing the suddenly out of control muscle to chill out.

"Can we talk?" He watched me with sad, puppy eyes.

"Fuck off." My voice was strong as I flipped him the middle finger.

"You came to bring me back. I'm back. For you." He took a step forward, determination etched into every line of his body.

At some point, he'd lost the suit jacket, and his sleeves were rolled up. The veins in his tanned forearms stood out and my traitorous thoughts were trying to tell me what a good idea it would be to trace them with my tongue.

"I changed my mind." Pulling back my shoulders, I dared him to argue.

Shaking his head slowly, he took yet another step forward. "It doesn't work like that. You can't stop loving someone just like that."

That calm facade the liquor had tricked me with, cracked. Peeling my top lip up, I sneered at him. "It's not just like that, asshole. Didn't you ever hear that you can't truly love someone who doesn't love you?" I made a show of glancing up and down his body. "You said all the right words and did all the wrong things. I finally wisened up to the fact that you don't love me. You never did."

Hell, now that I thought about it, he hadn’t even said the right words. I’d supplied what I’d wanted to believe. I was such a fucking idiot.

I turned back toward the sink, but he caught my arm and twirled me around.

"That's a fucking lie," he seethed as he glared down at me. His black eyebrows knitted over furious amber eyes.

"Oh, it is? You could have fooled me." I shrugged, like it was no big deal. "You only kicked me to the side for your brothers. And the one thing you did after you faked your death? You madeanotherwoman's dream come true." My voice cracked, dammit.

The numbness crumbled as I opened myself up to a house full of memories reminding me exactly how I felt when I'd found out he'd tracked down Amorette's sister.

The betrayal, the pain, the worthlessness.

I hadn't mattered to him at all. He'd cared more about making another woman happy than me. I hadn't even warranted a goddamned email.

"Fuck." I dashed my hands across my face, wiping tears that sprang up quickly.

Matías' gaze was glued to them as fury and guilt warred on his face. I shoved him away from me and it caught him off guard enough that he stumbled back a few steps. "Get the fuck away from me. You hear me?" I screamed. "I don't want to fucking see you. I don't want your pity. Your regret, or whatever else you're trying to do here. You should have stayed in Portugal! That's what you wanted right? A life away from me?"

"That's what you think I want?" He yelled, throwing one hand out. "You think I wanted to leave you? I did it to fuckingsaveyou! You're the only good thing that ever happened to me!"

"Then why did you find Grace for Amorette?" My voice was a screech, clawing against the sensitivity of my own ears. "Why not call me? Why not take me with you?" I slapped my hand over my mouth.

What was I doing? Even if he'd offered, I wouldn't have gone with him. Would I?

All my dumb ass did was hand him ammunition about how much I loved him. He was a man. He would use this against me somehow.

At one time, I wouldn't have thought Matías would hurt me.

But he'd proved me wrong. He showed me I had to takecare of my heart witheveryone. My instincts weren't to be trusted.

He fucking broke my trust in myself.

"Rita..." His voice was strangled. "I...fuck," he sighed. "I didn't think that would hurt you."

"You didn't think I would find out, you mean." I nodded succinctly. "Because I. Don't. Fucking. Matter."

"Rita!" he snapped.

Matías picked me up and set me down on the counter. Bottles went flying as if he'd cleared them with his arm. Maybe he had.

I couldn't look away from his eyes. He was livid and his left eye twitched. I'd never seen him like this.

I'd never seen him anything close to angry with me. I wanted more.

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