Page 60 of Fractured

“Keep doing that, and I’ll tell you anything you want,” he said happily as he closed his eyes. “My biggest flaw is my addiction to my work. Which most people find random and useless. But I love it, and with most of my relationships in the past, I let it carry me away, forgetting dates, dinners, everything except my current project.”

Like how he almost missed our first lunch date…

“I can hear your mind turning. And no, that’s not going to happen with us.” When he opened his eyes, the bright blue pierced me with their intensity. “Even before you, I pledged to myself that I’d live my life and set boundaries on my work. And I have. I’m not saying I don’t still get carried away, because I do.” He squeezed my ankle, and I knew he was thinking about that day in the park. “But I am living. And I want you to live too. No more hiding in the house, no more avoiding what you love. No more being afraid.”

My laugh was suspiciously wet, and my heart beat a little faster than I liked. “And who is going to help me do that?”

“I will. Atticus will. I believe Kenzo will too. The jury is still out on Saint, but I think he’s coming around.”

That erased some of the hurt in my chest. “I think he’s coming around too. And I’ll try. I want to be the person you want me to be, but don’t get too upset if I fuck it all up, okay?” My voice broke, and I wanted to cover my face to protect myself. Not physically, but emotionally.

“Wait. Just fucking wait.” He scrambled to his feet so fast, I couldn’t even track the movement. Then he was crouching in front of me, bracing my shoulders with such strength, I almost believed he could hold me together the way he wanted to.

“Lilith. This isn’t about who Iwantyou to be. I want you to be you. This is more about being who you are. Not hiding because you’re afraid. I know you’re strong. How can you not be after everything you went through? I know you’re talented. Smart. With a lovely dry sense of humor. I know you’re sexy. You just need to see yourself the way that I do.”

“We do.” Atticus opened the screen door and leaned against the doorjamb.

I struggled for breath as I stared both of them. Their absolute conviction about how this should go was probably the single most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. How did they have so much faith? So much hope?

All my life, I’d lost the ability to feel either.

What I did know was that I was spiraling, even if this was only the very beginning. The more I thought back to the funeral, the more fear I felt, because I couldn’t so easily explain that away as they could.

No, I take that back. All my life until them, I’d never felt hope or faith.

But what they were doing, how they believed. I clung with everything in me, that they would be enough to pull me out of the black hole that was trying to swallow me whole.

I didn’t have hope or faith in myself. But I had it in them.

“I—” Before I could finish that thought, my phone was ringing.

Glancing down, I couldn’t put a name on the emotion that ran through me. It was Autumn, and there couldn’t be a good reason she would reach out. Not after the last time.

Right?

“If you don’t want to talk to whoever that is, it’s okay. You can call them back later,” Atticus said carefully as he studied my face.

“No, that’s okay. It’s…an old friend of sorts.” I hit the green button to pick up the call. “Hi, Autumn.”

“Hi, Lilith. I hope you’re well?” There was something off in the tone of her voice today. She was still polite, friendly, but there was an undercurrent that sent a shiver down my spine.

“I’m doing surprisingly well actually,” I said with a sighed. And I was. No matter what other noise was happening around me, I had a little bit of peace here at my place and with the four men who’d swept me off my feet.

Her sigh was loud, as if her mouth nearly covered the phone. It was not a happy sound and had my spine straightening into a rigid rod.

“I debated on whether to call you or not. Most of the day, I leaned on no, but every so often, I’d think that I should, and I eventually settled on giving you a ring. What you do with the information is up to you. Did you ever get in contact with Drake?”

I jerked the phone away from my ear to stare at it. Atticus crouched down beside me and touched my shoulder, silently providing comfort. Ambrose was still kneeling in front of me, and with both of them here, I forced some of the uncertainty out of my mind. Just because she asked about Drake and he’d asked something of me I wasn’t sure I could give him, didn’t mean she was going to tell me anything that would hurt me.

Pulling the phone back up to my ear, I told her the truth. “I did actually meet him. Twice. Once by accident when I went to my father’s grave, and another when he showed up at my place. It was a little unnerving, but he said he wanted to make his case on why I should speak with him.”

The silence on the other end of the line was so loud, I swore it was ringing in my ears. I could feel my panic starting to increase, but Atticus cupped my cheek and mouthed, ‘Breathe.’

And I did. I inhaled, waited a beat, then released it slowly.

“That’s surprising. I didn’t realize that he would do that. I’m sorry, Lilith. I would have told you if I thought he’d approach you without your consent.”

There were no clues as to where she was going with this, I just wished she’d get to the point a bit faster for my own peace of mind. “He wasn’t violent. He didn’t hurt me. But I’m more interested in why you’re calling me.”

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