Page 58 of Fractured

No, actually, I needed to be. I wouldn’t accept it any other way.

Fourteen

When I walk on bitter pills, if I’m not careful, some will be crushed. - September 23rd

“I lovethe way your hair smells.” Kenzo made an exaggerated sniff against my neck. I giggled because my hair wasn’t even down. I was looking at myself in the bathroom mirror, getting ready for nothing at all. There was no plan or agenda for the day, I’d just had the sudden urge to at least put my hair up and get dressed. Kenzo took advantage and ambushed me.

“What time do you have to go into work today?” It was already two in the afternoon. We’d spent the morning having glorious sex all over my tiny house. And yes, Ambrose and Atticus had been involved.

The only one I hadn’t shared that kind of intimacy with was Saint. He was with us one hundred percent when it came to spending time together, exchanging playful banter, and as a participant with this overall relationship. But sexually, he still held himself back.

All I could think to myself was,Don’t be greedy.You have three other dicks to keep you occupied, and he’ll come around when he was ready.If anyone knew anything about taking their time and analyzing all of the risks, it was me.

So I could wait. I wouldn’t be bitter.

These four men had already performed miracles as far as I was concerned. I didn’t even feel the need to keep such stringent routines anymore. Which was probably a godsend, since I couldn’t bring myself to play the cello since the funeral.

All in due time, Saint had told me. Ambrose had simply brushed his fingers over the apple of my cheek and said I had probably subconsciously tied my music to my grief and I wasn’t ready to let go of Randolf yet.

Then there was Atticus, who just talked about how I was experiencing life as someone normally would. Most especially when I brought up my hallucination at the funeral. If he really thought I was slipping, he didn’t show it, and I made sure not to look too deep.

And then there was my funny, sweet Kenzo, who would rather crack jokes than give me pep talks.

“Actually, I have to leave right now. Such a shame,” he murmured as he ground his hard cock into my backside. This man, I swore, he could cure cancer with his dick. It was that good.

“I’ll be here later…” I pulled his arm away from my chest and kissed his wrists.

“I know. I just love it when we get some time to ourselves, ya know?”

“I do.” I loved spending time with them alone, together, in pairs. It didn’t matter, as long as they were with me. Or were close enough I could see them if I wanted to.

He hunched down and propped his chin on my shoulder. There was a different glint in his eyes as he looked at our reflection. Concerned it was something I wouldn’t like, I hesitated to ask about it. Kenzo didn’t make me ask at all.

“I’ve been thinking, after our texts the other night. I’d like you to come hang out at work with me. Meet some of my friends.” He looked down for a second, then brought his gaze back to the mirror. “At first, I’d just like it to be you. Once you’re settled, then we can start to include the others. Probably Saint first, since he’s the most levelheaded.”

I…didn’t know what to say. Was I ready for this kind of step? Was he?

“That’s…great.” Wincing, I dropped my head onto his shoulder so I could avoid our image in the mirror. “I don’t know if I want to do that yet. This is all still kind of surreal to me, and I have so much fuckery going on in my life right now.” I tried to explain. It was me, not him.

“Shh. I know. Just think about it, okay? We can do it on a weeknight so it isn’t that busy. There won’t be as many people there to stare at us. It would be fun.”

The hope in his voice made me think he wanted something normal, and it instantly gave me insecurities I’d thought I’d squashed. He must have noticed some minute change in my expression or my body language, because he hugged me to his chest.

“Just think about it. No pressure. We can wait as long as you want.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to go with you. Or take the next step.” Although that did scare me. “I think the biggest thing is that I haven’t talked to Harper about Brett.” I held my hand up, palm out to the mirror. “I know, I know. I’m being a bad friend, but I never thought it would last this long and…” That sounded weak, even to me.

“You don’t want her to hate you. Or think you’re trying to sabotage her relationship. Do you really think Harper would think that?”

“I don’t know. Maybe?” Honestly, she probably wouldn’t and this was just my own hang-up. “I just need to talk to her. But all I have—no offense—is your word. She’s not going to think there’s anything to it.”

He squeezed my hips reassuringly. “If that’s the case, then you’d have done all you can. I don’t even have all the details. He never explicitly comes out to say that he’s cheating. I just know the women he brings by my bar are not his sisters.” Then he grinned mischievously. “You know, if you start hanging out with me while I work, she’ll come more often by default and see for herself.”

“That’s been your plan the whole time, hasn’t it?” I smirked.

“Yup. You figured me out. I have an agenda for world domination, and you just cracked the first step. Bwahahaha!” He threw my laughing ass over his shoulder and carted me off to the bedroom for one more round of lovemaking before he left.

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