“I get that. But what you can do right now is focus on the things you can do. Like your art. Our friendship with the guys. Being there to support Trinity in any way she’ll let you.”
Part of the reason I’d made it out of my dad’s house so easily was because he was more absent than not. Astrid’s parents had been too there, raising her under their thumb. I didn’t know that I could have accomplished what she did if I’d been raised the same way. The pressure to conform from the people you were taught to love, respect, and obey would have been overwhelming.
“Is that what you did?” I dropped my hand to her hips and inched her up my thighs. Not close enough to touch my dick, but close enough it started to harden.
She grinned. “Heck yeah. I compartmentalized. I worked hard to push everything out of my head except the things that were going to get me out of their house. And when I couldn’t do it, I forced myself to review my plan and back up plans. Anything to still keep hope alive.”
I inched her up a little more.
“You know something, Astrid Scott?” Something about using her full name sent a thrill down my spine. Like this was a defining moment for us. Maybe it was, or maybe it was going to be one of several fond memories we’d make together.
“What?” She shifted up until she was poised right over my groin. I’d be a liar if I denied that my heart started to race like a hell horse making a great escape.
“You’re very good for me.” Then I bucked my hips just a little bit, making her fall over my chest when she lost her balance. I wrapped my arms around her back, trapping her to me and kissing her so deeply, I was lost to everything but her.
No matter what fears I couldn’t dispel, or dreams I couldn’t quite believe in, in this moment with her, I never wanted to be found again.
This was what I had been missing with Thatcher.
Not the kiss, or the way his body fit mine so perfectly as he moved my hips back and forth over his erection. Or the white-hot prickles teasing my lower spine and sending delicious tendrils through the rest of my body.
No, it was the closeness from sharing some of ourselves with each other. Parts that the rest of the world didn’t have the right to see. He knew so much of my life in the last few months that I reveled in finally knowing some of his. Because what was a relationship if you couldn’t take the good with the bad and the ugly? I wanted all the parts with Thatcher. Just like I knew he wanted all these parts of me.
A soft groan from Thatcher broke my train of thought as he crushed me to his chest with one hand tangled in my hair and one arm banded around me. His tongue delved into my mouth, dancing with mine. This was different than our previous kisses. This was ownership, plain and simple.
His arm moved down to cup my ass as he rocked me back and forth over his pelvis. He thrust in opposing time, turning the need into a blazing inferno that would engulf me at any moment.
“Thatcher,” I breathed as I broke away from the kiss. This was too much sensation. Because we were fully clothed in his living room made it seem forbidden and sexy.
“Shhh.” He rained kisses on my face and neck. “I just want to make you feel good. That’s all.”
Now he had one arm pressing in the center of my back, holding me down while his other gripped my hip, moving me faster and faster over him.
Perspiration dotted my brow and the back of my neck. My entire body was one mess of heat and tension waiting to be released. He bucked his hips harder, and I lost it.
“Thatch,” I cried as I buried my face in his throat, holding my breath, then panting, then holding my breath again. My arms and legs spasmed as I clutched him as tight as I could in this position.
“That’s it. That was so beautiful, you’re so beautiful. I loved this. I love—everything about you.” His soft murmurings into my hair slowly brought me back to myself as his gentle thrusting prolonged the orgasm racking my body.
When all the tension fled and left me in a pile of gooey limbs, he stopped his movements and just held me.
I had no sense of time as we lay there. The sound of his breathing was so soothing that my lids got heavy until I was almost asleep.
“You didn’t get anything out of that.” My voice was groggy as I nuzzled tighter into the crook of his neck. He was still mostly hard underneath me, pulsing softly against my stomach.
“Oh, but I did.” The male satisfaction was so strong, I wanted to laugh but I was too spent. Instead, I closed my eyes and rested against him.
“You didn’t want to do anything else?” Because men wanted sex, right? I wasn’t stupid or naïve. Foreplay was a leadup to their happy ending. A part of me stalled at the thought. I’d lost my virginity, but that didn’t mean I wanted to sleep with all the guys at once. This had been nice though, and natural.
“No. This was all for you. I’ve wanted to do this since I started pulling you out of class for art lessons. The reality was so much better than the dream.” My hair moved as his breath whispered across the crown of my head.
Lethargically, I straightened my legs out, then slid to the side as I hugged his chest. I could have gone to sleep, but I made myself stay awake just to enjoy our time together.
A key scraped against the door seconds before it flew open and Trinity stumbled inside. Surprised, I lifted my head to stare at her. My heart sank as she slammed the door and took several unsteady steps to the kitchen table, where she dropped her tattered L.L. Bean backpack. It was a mixed abstract pattern of bright turquoise and soft lavender. Somehow, the colors didn’t suit her at all. They were too bright, too cheery. Too young.
Her steps stuttered as she noticed us on the couch.
“Isn’t this nice. Your turn tonight, Thatcher?” Her words were slurred and venom shone from her eyes.