Page 55 of Flake It Til You Make It

So hot that Taylor wouldn’t be able to resist—

No.No. Do not go there. Do not pass Go. Do not collect two hundred dollars.

“He wouldn’t like it,” Taylor agreed.

“That why we’re running so goddamn fast?” Jem wondered casually, but it was clear from both Jem’s uneven breathing and his own, that yes, they were running fast.

He slowed down and Jem followed suit.

“I . . .” Taylor made a face. “We got into a little bit of an argument the other night.”

“Ah, trying to punish yourself, huh,” Jem pointed out dryly. “I get that. Or I do theoretically. I don’t think Murph and I argued for months when we first got together. We were too busy in bed or uh . . .in the shower . . .or once . . .” He trailed off and cleared his throat. “You get the idea.”

“I do,” Taylor said wryly. Wondered what Jem would say if he admitted that all he and Rocco had done was kiss.

“So what happened?” Jem asked.

“I think we want different things out of this,” Taylor said. Even though he wasn’t sure that was really true. He knewonething they both really wanted.

Jem frowned. “I don’t know Rocco very well, he’s too new to town, but surely, it’s early to be having that argument?”

“I need to be focused on this job, and on the job I want. I can’t let . . . Rocco’s a distraction.” It wasn’t even a good lie. Taylor didn’t even believe it.

And neither did Jem.

“You’re the one who asked him out,” Jem said wryly.

Apparently theywerefriends now, because Jem felt comfortable enough to call him out. Deservedly. Taylor could have left it alone. Could have never gone to Jolly Java and taken Rocco up on his offer.

Could have told himself and Rocco the truth.

You scare the shit out of me.

“I know, I guess I thought . . .I guess I thought I could keep my head.”And my hands to myself.

“Keeping your head is overrated,” Jem said.

“Not when I have this job on the line,” Taylor objected. “I nearly fucked this all up once, and I can’t do it again.”

“How do you know having Rocco in your life is going to make that happen?” Jem’s question seemed so reasonable.

Taylor didn’t really make the decision to tell Jem. It just spilled out. “I had a boyfriend, a couple of years back, when I was still in Chicago. But I had befriended Mona, over the years, and she knew I’d always wanted a job in Christmas Falls. They were working on getting her an assistant, and when the funding came through, she offered me the job. But I . . .” Taylor let out a hard breath. “I thought I was in love. And I didn’t want to leave Michael in Chicago. We’d been together about six months, and I thought, maybe this would be better. Maybe I should just give up on the whole Christmas Falls thing. That’s the past, and maybe Michael’s the future.”

“He wasn’t, was he?” Jem patted him on the shoulder. “Shit, man, that’s rough. But you ended up here anyway?”

“A month after I turned down Mona’s job offer, Michael got an offer to transfer to Seattle. He took it and didn’t evenaskme. Just laughed when I told him I’d thought we were going the distance. I was so stupid.”

“Rocco wouldn’t ever do that. He’s in town to stay.”

“Yeah, but I took my eyes off the prize, for a second. Thought I could haveboth, a professional future and a guy who’d stick, who’dstay, and . . .” Taylor didn’t need to say it. He’d gotten screwed over when he’d imagined that might be true. Michael had fuckinglaughedat him for believing it. Called him naive.

And he’d ended up alone, again.

“He was an asshole. I don’t know Rocco well yet, but I do know he’s not an asshole.” Jem cleared his throat. “Here’s something else Idoknow, because I almost fell victim to it myself, last year. I didn’t think I could have Murph, either. But the only person standing in the way of that? It was me. I was holding myself back, for no good reason.”

“I want to believe that’s true, because it would make everything a hell of a lot easier.” He could go to Rocco right now, swing down Candy Cane Lane and walk into Jolly Java, tell the guy who’d been starring in his dreams for weeks now that he wanted him,for real. Beg, even. Would Rocco give him the cold shoulder? He’d never said it explicitly, but he’d been disappointed the other night, and speaking of the other night, there’d been the way he’d kissed Taylor back . ..

“Then make it easier. The risk is worth it, I promise,” Jem said firmly.

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