Page 40 of sWitch

Dying my hair every color imaginable, coming up with vibrant makeup styles, and dressing myself like my own personal avatar from some far off, more interesting world was how I coped with the monotony of life. Everything was shades of boring…until I met Remy.

Remy was like opening blackout curtains to find morning light pouring into your bedroom. Her reckless abandon for whatever she wanted, whatever seemed right at the time was intoxicating. Licking slushie off my thighs, sneaking through a closed shopping mall, or stealing my kittens back—Remy didn’t care what anyone thought of her. Yet, in the grand conundrum that was all her, she cared a whole heck of a lot about me.

I didn’t deserve that kind of love, not after what I’d put her through: lying, hiding parts of myself, forcing her to go behind her brother’s back to get close to me. I thought I could diffuse the attraction and slip away back into my obscure beige life—but shewouldn’t let me, always pulling me in, pulling me out of myself, showing me color again. Despite her affinity for black, Remy was color personified. Remy was sunshine poured into the dark room that was me, and it would take me a while to comprehend what exactly I’d stepped into when I got to the Monroe twins’ apartment that night.

The whole band, plus Trevor, were huddled in various positions, clutching game devices. They cheered and welcomed me when I arrived, piecing together what was going on. V for Valin blinked across several monitors as the team finished off a herd of cyborg hyenas.

“Princess Peach!” Rollo called. “We’ve got a spare pink controller with your name on it. Bowser’s Castle awaits!”

“Hey, Faun,” Trevor said after taking a sip from a beer bottle. “Ready to kick some Valin ass?”

I looked to Remy. “What’s going on? Game night?”

Joss waved hello and tossed a pizza box into a pile with several others. “Oh, this isn’t game night. This is a slaughter, a reckoning. We crave vengeance!”

The band cheered and Trevor laughed.

Remy rubbed her forehead. “They’re all so clearly drunk.” A pillow flew across the room, and Remy caught it before it hit her face. Chuckling, she tossed it back at her assailant. “Except for you, Lennon. Always the responsible, sober one.”

Len nodded their approval, gave me a salute, and went back to fighting cyborgs.

“Wait.” I walked closer to the screens. “Cyborg hyenas are like…right before the end trails. How far into this are you guys?” Something pawed at my ankles, and I squealed in delight as I scooped up Turnip. He purred immediately as I cradled him.

Remy scratched my long-lost kitten’s ear. “This is all for you, princess. We’re beating the game. We need your help to push us over the edge, though.”

So casually, without even looking up from petting under the cat’s chin, Remy had changed my entire life.

“You—you have to be joking. How— Why would you do this?” Tears filled my eyes.

Remy cupped my jaw. “Haven’t you figured it out by now? I’d do anything for you.”

The band groaned dramatically in the background, and I couldn’t help my laugh as I wiped the tears from my eyes. Remy reached around my neck and carefully pulled my kitty cat headphones over my ears. “What do you say? Want to foil Prue’s devious schemes?”

I nodded. “Let’s do it. Put me in, coach.”

With my headphones on, I settled into a bean bag chair next to Trevor. Remy took a seat between my knees and leaned back onto my middle. The position threatened to both distract and calm me at the same time. I battled my desire along with the overwhelming sense of calm she brought. What a strange combination I’d never experienced before.

Trevor raised a playful eyebrow in my direction, and I flushed. He knew the whole time fake dating that I was into Remy. Though I’d never have admitted it, I thought I could brush the attraction away, but clearly, it was written all over my face the entire time. Still, I never saw him and Mary Jane coming. I wonder if Remy even cared? I mean…we basically justswitchedpartners, didn’t we?

Those thoughts mixed with the gravity of all Remy meant to me as I rested my wrists on her shoulder, my thumbs clicking against the controls as we took down a party of skeleton overlords. The band had taken me in, no question, gaming for days on end, and no one made me feel like a loser. This was so bizarre… It was so nice. It was all because of Remy.

With a deep breath, I drew on the support of the people around me. I trusted in this little team of avatars on the screen and people under the neon lights of the twins’ gaming room as they joked and laughed—and I dove into my last battle with V for Valin, my fight against my shame, my urge to hide instead of stand up for myself. I fought against skeleton overlords on screen with magic from my broomstick—but internally, I warred against the part of me that always took the hits but never hit back. Had I made mistakes and trusted the wrong people? Yes. Did I deserve to live a life being small and hiding because of it? No. No, not anymore.

“We’ve almost beat moon core,” Joss proclaimed, her green buzz cut and muscular avatar tossing a skull into a pile of bones. “It’s end game.”

I responded, “We have to step through the moon exit portal together, holding hands, if our party is to stay intact.”

“For real?” Trevor asked, his mercenary avatar taking my pink witch’s hand. “Glad you’re with us, Faun.”

Remy’s avatar took my witch’s other hand. “We got this, princess.”

Joss, Rollo, and Lennon joined us, and we collectively stepped through the glowing purple archway to the final level of V for Valin, a trail only a handful of players had reached, much less completed.

Twinkling stars enveloped each of our characters, and the room fell silent, apart from the buzz of the monitors and the dramatic cut scene of our party being transported through pixels and stars. “Oh, by the way,” I broke the quiet tension of the room. Remy leaned back and looked up at me through thoseimpossibly thick, dark lashes, making me swoon. “I know you cyber-fucked me with your brother’s avatar.”

The room lost their minds laughing—and I couldn’t contain my own smile as Remy put a hand to their chest like a mock shot had been fired. “You knew the whole time?”

Trevor groaned. “That’s so fucked up—you’re such a fucking punk.” He hit Remy’s shoulder.

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