Page 107 of Bound to the Orc Warrior

He grunts. “You speak ogrish. Good.”

Another echo:“I like it when I can understand their screams.”

“What the actual fuck, dude? What’s up with the creeper-talk? Do you get off on scaring women?”

Instead of answering, he starts to climb again.

I leap to my feet, whirling to see if there’s anything that can help. Sunlight drenches the forest all around. If the stone stood at the edge of the clearing, I could jump into one of the pine trees, but it’s right in the center.

Fuck me sideways with a rusty spoon.

“You! You call yourself a goddess?” I scream up at the sky. That goddess / woman / glowing entity who pretended to be my mom for a hot minute dropped me into this mess—she can damn well get me out of it “Come and fix this!”

No ball of light appears. No woman’s voice sings out.

“Typical,” I mutter. Why should I be surprised? Both European and Chinese mythology are jam-packed with gods and goddesses screwing over humans.

A meaty gray hand slaps onto the top of the rock.

I stomp on it, bearing down with the low heel of my cute ankle boot. Why did I have to be so practical? A stiletto heel sure would be awesome about now.

Instead of letting go, or better yet falling off the side of the pillar, the asshole laughs.

Ihatebeing laughed at.

When I stomp again, he only laughs harder, small black eyes staring up at me with an unholy glee. His hand lashes out, grabbing my ankle.

“Shit!”

A man—agreenman—rides out of the trees on a white unicorn. He’s tall, with the kind of chest and shoulders you only get if you live at the gym or do heavy construction ten hours a day. Brown leather pants and a purple tunic shirt hug his muscles. He’s handsome, with a strong jaw and a gorgeous mouth framed by tusks. Long black hair flows behind him, kept from his eyes by a…

“Holy shit,” I whisper. “Is that a crown?”

“Get away from my bride!” he roars.

Bride? Do what now?

The hand gripping my ankle releases to grip the stone once again.

The green man stands in the stirrups and jumps up, balancing on the saddle like a trick rider at a rodeo. When the unicorn runs past the pillar, the man leaps, sailing farther than any human could manage. He latches onto the gray dude’s shoulders and heaves.

They go flying backward.

The green man does a complex twist in the air, one boot lashing out to hit the rock and send him shooting in a new trajectory away from the other guy. He rolls across the moss, popping back up to his feet.

The gray dude lands flat on his back with a loud whomp, all the air expelled from his lungs. But the asshole doesn’t stay down for long. He jumps up, pulling the axe from his back and spinning to face the newcomer. A long dark bruise already shows on his back where his full weight landed on the weapon’s handle.

“Orc scum!” he yells. “This sky gift is mine.”

Okay, green guy is an orc. Check.

“You lie, ogre. The Moon Goddess summoned me.” The orc unsheathes his sword. “The human is my bride.”

We’re seriously going to have to have a talk about this bride shit, but for now, he can think anything he wants as long as he gets gray dude away from me.

The unicorn thunders back into the clearing, chasing a scaled yellow-green horse. “Face me, kelpie!” a female voice cries out. “Feel the might of my horn!”

I gasp. Holy shit. Even the animals talk!

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