Page 47 of (Not So) Mad About You

“Big feelings,” Liz said. “About someone with anger problems? About someone who is supposed to be in therapy?”

Bea swallowed. Okay, that was a fair point. “We all have our weaknesses though, don’t we?” she said. “And opposites attract, right?”

“Attraction and relationships are two different things,” Liz warned her. “Just try not to confuse the two.”

“I’m not a child.”

Liz laughed. “I know, I know. And I’m sounding like an interfering aunt. I’m sorry. I want you to be okay, Bea. I worry about you.”

“I don’t need looking after all the time.”

There was another minute pause. “Don’t you?” Liz said finally.

And Bea knew she meant it in a caring way, knew that she wasn’t being patronized too, but at the same time she didn’t want to be the kind of person that needed looking after. She wanted to be independent and strong. Like… like Alli.

“I’ve got this,” she said to Liz quite calmly. “I know what I’m doing.”

“Okay,” Liz said. “But I’m here if you need me. Always.”

Bea hung up the phone and wondered if she should have told Liz all that. But then, she hadn’t been able to help it, she’d been bursting with the news. She still was. She could still feel Alli on her lips.

Alli.

She hadn’t exactly sounded thrilled about what had happened. That long, drawn-out ‘fuck’ hadn’t sounded like someone who wanted more.

Well too bad. For once, Bea was determined to get what she wanted out of life. If Alli needed a little persuasion to see what this thing was, then Bea was going to persuade her.

She went off to shower and to think of a plan for what she was going to say to Alli the next time she found her.

THE TINY STAFFROOM was full by the time Bea pushed her way in to make some coffee. And the air was abuzz with chatter.

“Luke’s mad as a snake,” Josh was saying.

“Well, he would be, wouldn’t he?” Celine said. “The two of them were doing whatever it was they were doing.”

Which made Bea think about sex and then about Alli and then… her mouth got weirdly dry.

“You don’t know where she might have gone, do you?” Celine asked, turning to Bea. “Daria, we’re talking about.” Like there was someone else who’d disappeared in the night.

“Not a clue,” Bea said cheerfully.

“Well, I heard that she’d come into some money,” sniffed Celine.

Bea blushed, thinking of Alli’s money, thinking that Alli had been desperate enough to pay the woman to try and get out of here. Which was stupid. Stupid because Alli so clearly needed to be here. Stupid because Bea wanted her to stay.

“Glad that someone’s got some money,” Josh grumbled.

Bea suddenly thought about the figures she’d seen on Luke’s desk.

How much money was this place making, she wondered.

It couldn’t be that much. No, it shouldn’t be that much. And yet… She paused, coffeepot in hand. And yet something just wasn’t right. Something about the numbers she’d seen on Luke’s desk. Something about the way the programmers talked in group therapy. Something just didn’t add up.

It was like a mosaic with one tile just a little out of kilter.

“You alright over there, Bea?” Josh called.

“Yes,” she said quickly. “Fine. Anyone want coffee?”

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