Page 35 of The Damaged Hearts Bargain

Cal had never come out. She’d never had to. She’d never been in anything to come out of. The way she was was just… the way she was. And her mother had never asked for anything different, never commented on her dating choices or her crushes, had obediently purchased Disney princess sticker books because of Cal’s latest crush on whichever princess it was.

Cal snorted. Her mother had been a wing-man, even when she was little. There were worse ways of growing up. Infinitely worse ways.

She blew out a breath, fully aware of the fact that she was trying very hard to forget about what had just happened. Which was hard because the kiss had been… lovely. All sparkly and bright, all breathy and brushing, the right pressure, the right movements, just a beautiful diamond of a kiss.

Of course, the fact that it was with Lucy was sort of a problem. The fact that Lucy had now fled was more of a problem. Cal didn’t hurt people, that wasn’t her way. And Lucy was hurting now because Cal had reacted badly.

She sighed, got up and closed the wardrobe. “Bye,” she said, then she snorted a laugh. “Talking to you like you’re inside a damn wardrobe, what am I like?”

She picked up the two abandoned cups of tea and took them back downstairs, taking the time to rinse them out and leave them on the draining board before locking the house up and setting off down the pavement.

If she walked long enough she’d find Lucy, she was sure of it. In fact, she was already pretty certain of where she’d find her. The same place she’d go in Lucy’s situation. What she wasn’t sure of was what exactly she was going to say when she found her.

She strolled down the street and then turned onto the promenade, the wind stirring her hair as the sun beat down on her skin. It was another hot day and the sea was calm, blue and white, licking at the shore.

Sure enough, she soon spotted a figure on the sand, dark hair blowing in the breeze, shoes dangling from one hand.

The beach called to people. Or maybe the sea did, Cal wasn’t sure. But there was something about it that lured you in when you were feeling sad or confused. She’d spent many an evening sitting in the sand.

She leaned on the balustrade and took a deep breath of salty air.

Why couldn’t she kiss sweet Lucy?

Lucy was a part of town, that much was obvious. She had been rescued here, loved it here, had friends here. She was also very much looking for something serious and Cal very much was not. There was something else though, some niggling feeling that left Cal guilty and sweaty at the thought.

The thought that at some point, someone would tell Lucy what had happened. And then Lucy would feel betrayed and used and Cal just couldn’t have that.

So there really was only one solution, wasn’t there?

If Lucy was going to find out the truth at some point, it might as well be now. And it might as well come from Cal herself.

Cal straightened up, kicked off her sneakers and tied the laces together, draping them around her neck as she rolled up the cuffs of her jeans and then walked down the stairs to the sand.

“Funny, isn’t it?” she said, when she reached Lucy.

“What?”

“The way the sea always looks different and yet the same. It always worried me as a kid. We’d go somewhere and see the sea there and I was always worried that when I came back home there wouldn’t be any sea here, that it had all somehow gone away to a new place.”

Lucy smiled a little. “That’s sweet.”

“But it’s always right here where it’s always been. Right here where I know every rock, every grain of sand. Or I did.” Cal breathed. “Not sure I do anymore. It’s been a long time.” She looked over at Lucy. “Sit with me?”

Lucy hesitated for a second then nodded and they both sat on the sand.

“I didn’t react well,” Cal said immediately. “And I’m sorry for that. I could have… been clearer maybe.”

“I don’t really understand,” Lucy said. “It was just a kiss and we’re obviously attracted to each other. Or I think we are. I mean, I am.”

“I’m attracted,” Cal said carefully. Christ, it was now or never. “Listen, I need to tell you something.”

“Anything you like.”

The sea beat on against the sand, rushing and hissing in and out and Cal collected her thoughts before she began.

“I don’t know if it’s still a thing,” she said finally. “But when I was a kid, Tetherington had a women’s club. Mostly it was an excuse to go down the pub and gossip, I think. But they did good things too, volunteered, helped out around town, that sort of thing.”

“It still exists,” said Lucy. “But it’s not a women’s club anymore, more of an anyone club. George is in it, he always dresses up as Santa for Christmas. Even though Billy, his husband, tells him he looks more like an elf.”

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