Page 90 of The Good Girl

“Um…I’ve already given them Capone’s number. They’ve been having trouble with fights and need security. I hope that was okay.”

“Yeah, that’s more than okay. Hannibal said you thought you’d been followed. Anything more come of that?”

She shakes her head. “Kruger and Circus have been taking turns picking me up. They said they haven’t seen anything unusual.”

“Good. The shelter––is it for everyone, or just for women?”

“It’s for anyone who needs a place to stay, but mostly takes in people with mental health issues that need a little extra help.”

I stare at her as she fidgets and bites her lip. “Tell Capone I’m good with him taking the job if he thinks he can make it work and the club will fund it. I don’t want people getting hurt if we can help.”

She lets out a relieved breath and fights back tears.

“This place means a lot to you?” G asks her softly.

She looks between me and him, looking unsure.

“You won’t get any judgment from us,” I tell her, holding my hands up.

“After what happened with Bear. I wasn’t in a good place,” she says gently.

G sucks in a sharp breath but doesn’t say anything.

“I couldn’t stay here—to sleep, I mean. I kept busy during the day or I was with the guys, but when it was time to sleep, my dreams kept replaying everything that happened like some fucked-up movie stuck on repeat.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” G asks, but I can hear the strain in his voice.

“You guys were dealing with enough, and I didn’t want to look weak,” she says with a shrug. “I’m not stupid. I know I’mreplaceable. And what good is a broken whore? If I couldn’t do my job, you’d kick me out and?—”

“Jesus fuck, Lil. That was never going to happen. I know what you did to protect the others,” he tells her, tears and shame appearing in her eyes. “You kept their focus on you and away from everyone else. You sacrificed yourself for them. How could you ever think we’d give up on you when you never gave up on us?”

Watching them, I’ve realized there’s a lot of unresolved tension in this club from what happened. The betrayal, the violence––it’s left scars that everyone is dealing with and healing from. I might have my own shit to work through, but I’m not the only one. Everyone here is carrying something. We’re just so caught up in our own shit that we don’t notice.

“I couldn’t take that chance,” she whispers as a tear falls down her cheek. G opens his mouth, but Lil continues. “Anyway…” she takes a shaky breath, wiping the tears from her face. “I couldn’t afford to stay anywhere other than the clubhouse, so there were days I just slept outside. As strange as it sounds, I actually felt safer doing that than sleeping here. Eventually, I saved enough to buy my car and slept in it for a while.

“A nurse at the hospital told me about her friend. She was a therapist, which I couldn’t afford, but she was willing to see me if I worked at the shelter she ran a couple of towns over. So that’s what I did. And I think helping out there has helped as much, if not more, than just talking about everything.”

Her eyes widen, and I frown.

“Of course, I didn’t mention the club or what happened here. I told her something happened when I was in college at a frat party…” Her voice trails off as I reach over the bar and grab the back of her wrist.

“You didn’t do anything wrong. I appreciate you keeping our secrets, but if you would’ve asked, Blade would’ve found someone for you to talk to and paid them to keep their quiet so you could be honest and get it all off your chest.”

“But if Blade wanted to know, they would’ve told him, and what happened is mine to share. Nobody else’s.” She tugs her arm free.

“You’re right,” I say eventually, and by the look on her face, she wasn’t expecting that.

“Is the new shelter here run by the same person who helped you?” G asks, snapping Lil out of her shock.

She nods. “Yeah. The one she ran before, the building it was in, was torn down for some revitalization project. And there was no other place big enough for her to use, so I suggested she come here, forgetting that I hadn’t been completely honest with her.”

“I doubt she’ll hold it against you. I’m sure plenty of people hold back or tweak shit in therapy.”

Her shoulders relax, and she lets out a breath as some of the tension leaves her body. “Thanks. It’s been really bothering me,” she admits.

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Lil,” G repeats.

“I’m just a regular whore using her pussy powers for the greater good,” she snarks, and I can see a spark of the girl she must have been before everything changed for her.

---