Page 96 of The Fake Play

“There are things about me you should know.”

“Whatever it is, it’s okay.”

“After Michael’s accident, I sort of lost myself. He went into rehab, and I could have used it, too. But not for drugs. Well, okay there were some drugs, but more for guys.”

“What do you mean?”

I take a deep breath, and this time, he’s the one who braces.

“I dated every good-looking boy I could find. Dad had left us a few years before, and with Michael in rehab, and Mom being a total bitch about everything, I needed attention, so I found it. A lot. I partied all through high school, and when I got to college, I partied some more. I was a waste of space, as Mom put it. I didn’t get serious about life until sophomore year.”

“I’m sorry you felt like you needed to do that, but all of that brought you here to this moment.”

“You’re not disappointed in me?”

He smiles and shakes his head. “No.” Luke kisses my forehead before continuing. “I stand by what I said, baby. I’m not disappointed in you. All of that just means we have more in common than I thought. We were both wild in our youth and that means we know what to watch out for when our child comes. I’ve got you. You’ve got me. And we’ve got them. You hear me?”

And just like that, all the shame I’ve been carrying about those years evaporates. As it turns out, all I needed was a little perspective. I was an expert in being a troubled teen. He’s right—I do know the signs to watch out for because I’d been there already. He had, too. The lies, the partying, the drugs, every bad choice had prepared me for what was to come.

I gulp and nod. “We’ve got this.”

“That’s right. We do.”

I’m shouting at the top of my lungs an hour after my confessional crisis.

“You’re almost there, Keke, just one more push.”

I nod, feeling his strength bolster mine. I need that more than I can tell him in the moment, vowing to tell him later how much he helped me.

In a final burst of pain, I feel a rush and a release, followed by intense relaxation, almost like a drug taking hold.

Then, suddenly, a sound fills the room—a small, ragged, piercing cry that echoes through my soul.

I blink, my breath catching in my throat as the doctor holds up a small, wriggling, red-faced baby. Luke cuts the cord, and they take the baby away for a moment to do initial vital checks.

“It’s a boy!”

A son. I have a son.

Luke’s hand tightens around mine as the nurse brings our son over to me, placing his tiny, warm body against my chest. His skin is soft, his face scrunched as he lets out another small wail, his little fists clenched and waving. My mind goes quiet as I gaze down at him. A primal protective love swells inside me, so powerful it takes up every corner of my heart and soul. It’s in that moment that I know I will do anything for this child. Anything.

For a few perfect moments, I let myself simply be there, listening to his breaths, feeling his skin, his nearly bald head. This is my son, and everything about him is perfect.

I look at Luke, trying to keep the fear from showing, but he knows it’s there.

“Keke, you’re going to be an amazing mom. You’re not your mother. You’re not going to walk away, and you’re not going to hurt him the way she hurt you. I know that because I know you.”

A tear slips down my cheek, though it might have been sweat. “But what if… what if I don’t know what to do at times?”

“Then we’ll figure it out together. You’re not alone, Keke. You’ll never be alone. You have me, you have your brother, youhave Whitney, and everyone else in our lives who loves you. And even if we make mistakes—and we will—we’ll fix them together. Every time.”

I look back down at our son, his peaceful face nestled against me. Luke is right—I wasn’t alone. I have him, and we are in this together, a family bound by love and loyalty. Nothing will tear us apart.

I rested my hand on our son’s back, his heartbeat a steady rhythm that echoes the one in my own chest. “Always and forever, little one.”

A gentle knock sounds at the door, a nurse peeking in with a bright smile. “You’ve got quite the crowd out here,” she says with a laugh, nodding toward the hallway. “Looks like everyone’s eager to meet your new addition.”

Luke grins, holding up his phone to reveal a series of messages and FaceTime calls from the team, his family, Michael, and Whitney. I laugh, imagining the scene outside the room—Whitney standing guard, the team crowded around, eager to welcome the newest member of our family.

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