Page 85 of The Only Time

“Yes,” I answer.

“And told you he loved you?” he continues.

“Mmm hmm,” I reply reluctantly.

“Then you told him to leave?” he questions.

“Yes,” I cry.

“Good,” he says as he sits up straight.

My head jerks up at him. Did I hear him correctly? “Why is that good?”

“Because he fucked up. It’s going to take a hell of a lot more for him to win you back after how he made you feel. He can’tjust fly here when he thought the worst had happened to you and declare his love. That’s not fair for him to put you in that position when you were trying to recover.”

“You think so?” I ask, wondering if maybe I’m not crazy after all.

“Of course,” he replies quickly.

“But he’s not that type,” I tell him. “If I ask him to leave, he’s not going to come back and try harder. I don’t think he loves me that hard. I don’t think I’m worthy of that kind of love.”

Everyone’s face seems to fall.

“Are you serious?” Marcus answers loudly. “Mia, you are worthy of that kind of love and more. No one is more kind and giving than you. How could you think that?”

I shrug my shoulders. “No man has ever treated me like that. Like I was worth the world, and they would do anything to have me. Minus Don, but he doesn’t count. He wasn’t all there in the head, and he doesn’t really love me. He just thinks he does. But growing up, it was you guys who had girls fawning over you. I was just the invisible sister that never grabbed anyone’s attention.”

“That means men are fucking idiots, not that you’re not worth it,” Lucas replies. “And our idiot friends all wanted a chance with you, but we threatened their lives if they ever thought about touching you.”

You would think that would make me feel better, but I don’t care anymore. I only want Eric, and I’m afraid that I’ve lost him.

“I just wonder if maybe I should’ve listened more when he was making that effort. I’m sure it took a lot for him to come say all that to me,” I admit as I pick a piece of lint off of my yoga pants.

“Why did you ask him to leave?” Lucas asks.

Savannah smacks him behind the head for his question which makes me laugh.

“It’s ok,” I say with a smile. “I guess I was scared to believe it. It seemed too good to be true. The thought still scares me. What if he’s confusing caring for me with being in love with me? I get that he cares about me, and it was scary to hear something had happened to me. But that’s not the same as love.”

“So, you need more proof before you put yourself out there again?” Marcus reiterates for me.

I nod my head. “Does that sound stupid? Like I’m the reason for my own misery right now?”

“Not at all,” he replies. “I get it. From everything he told you from the beginning, how much he hates relationships, to letting you go the way he did. You’re right to be cautious with your heart.”

I don’t know what to think or feel anymore. I think what I need right now is a nap. Everything that has happened since I’ve been home is catching up with me, and all I want to do is pretend my reality doesn’t exist.

“Hey, thank you guys so much for stopping over, but I think I need to get some rest. I just took that pain medication not too long ago, so I should rest while I'm most comfortable.”

“Are you sure?” Lexi asks gently. “I can hang out for a bit while you sleep just so there’s someone here when you wake up.”

I smile at her sweet offer, but I know her and Marcus need to get back to Chicago. Her mom must miss her.

“You don’t have to do that. You guys really should get back to Chicago. I promise I’ll be okay. It’ll take time, but I’ll move on from all of this.”

I let them all look at each other around the room to see if someone is going to object or honor my request. Gabe, being the oldest, nods his head and makes the final decision.

“If you want to be alone, we can go. But we are stopping over tomorrow, no questions asked,” he says.

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