Page 71 of The Only Time

He looks up at me and sits up straight. “Hi.”

Too afraid to come all the way into the room, I opt to lean against the doorframe. I wring my fingers together as my brain spins to come up with what to say.

“So, umm, I talked to my brother the other day,” I tell him as butterflies continue to dance in my stomach. “He told me that Don has been home for a couple of weeks now. The guy he hired to follow him has confirmed that he’s been going to work, and it should be safe enough for me to come home.”

His jaw tenses at my words but he doesn’t look at me. “I see.”

“Well, I was considering staying another couple of weeks just to give it some more time to see if he makes a move, but I am clear to go home any time now.”

“I’m sure you’re relieved,” he says as he clutches his glass, his eyes dark as they hold mine.

“I guess I was just wondering, since this is your house and all, what you thought about me staying a bit longer or,” I trail off, not sure how to finish my sentence.

A bitter laugh escapes him. “You can stay or go. This is your decision.”

It’s like a knife directly through my heart. I know he’s angry, but I didn’t think he would be so cruel. “After all we’ve been through, you don’t care whether I stay or go?”

He stands up and walks towards me, each step heavy and deliberate. “I told you from the beginning, I don’t do relationships. This was always temporary, so don’t talk to me like I’m the bad guy here.”

With that, he walks away leaving me stunned and broken in his office.

I pack my bags through the blur of my tears. There’s no point in me staying here another minute if that is how he is going to treat our time together. I thought there was something more. Did I make all of that up in my head?

First, I date a guy who turns into a stalker that I have to hide from. Then I move on to someone who is emotionally unavailable, who even warned me that he was, and I still thought there was a chance for us.

I can no longer trust my instincts with men ever again.

Once my suitcases are stuffed to the brim, I close them up and start to take them downstairs one by one to my car.

I don’t even care if I’m overreacting. I’m leaving now. An ultimate low point would be to cry myself to sleep in his home like some poor pathetic woman.

As I carry down my last suitcase, he’s standing by the front door with his arms crossed. His eyes hold the same distance andanger that I saw the first time we met like nothing has changed. Maybe I did imagine all of those moments where I thought we were connecting on a level that I’ve never experienced before.

I stop at the door and look up at him knowing my face must look horrific.

“You’re going,” his deep voice states coldly.

“Like you said, this was always temporary.” I throw his words back in his face. “Thank you for keeping me safe these last two months. I appreciate all of the effort you put into that and will always be grateful. Goodbye, Eric.”

His hands, which are not at his sides, are balled into fists. The skin is turning red from how hard he seems to be squeezing, but he makes no move towards me. No hug goodbye. He just stays frozen.

A harsh laugh escapes me as I grab my suitcase and walk out the door. Of course, he can’t even muster up a simple you’re welcome. I throw my suitcases into my trunk and hop in my car without looking back, tears now streaming down my cheeks.

As I drive away, a sudden feeling of emptiness takes up my insides. I’ve never felt this before. It’s like he ripped out my heart as a souvenir, leaving it back at his house while I drive away with nothing but hollowness and regret.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Eric

I stare down at the numbers on the page but for the life of me I can’t focus on them. They might as well be in Japanese. I didn’t sleep a minute last night. How can I when I will never know the warmth of her body in my bed again?

I’ll never come home from work and see her dancing in my kitchen while cooking dinner. I’ll never feel the softness of her lips against mine. I’ll never get to watch my favorite shade of red spread from her cheeks down to her chest when she’s embarrassed.

But fuck, why was she trying to force me to leave my job? It just hit too close to home. Kim left me because I didn’t advance fast enough in my career, and Mia was already trying to get me to switch careers.

It’s exactly why I wanted to avoid falling in love ever again. It comes with the other person’s expectations and eventually their disappointment in you. I don’t need that shit in my life.

I was doing fine before I met Mia. Now look at me. I can’t even get a simple task completed at work because she’s all I can think about.

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