Page 65 of The Only Time

His hand comes in contact with the wood, creating a loud boom that echoes in the barn. “Why are you bringing this up? I never asked for your opinion,” he screams, eyes dark with anger.

My breath catches in my throat. I try to swallow back my fear. “I’m sorry. I’m just trying to help you.”

“Help me? I never asked for help. You know what I think,” he says while he leans down on the wood. “I think you’re trying to help yourself. You think if you fix me, maybe you have a shot with me. I never promised anything to you, Mia. I was honest with what this was from the beginning.”

There it is. The words I’ve been dreading since the moment I knew I was falling for him. This is all just sex to him. Tears fill my eyes making my vision blurry. It’s not worth the effort of trying to blink them away, they already start to run down my cheeks.

I try to open my mouth to respond, but nothing comes out. There’s nothing for me to say. He’s right. He was honest from the beginning, and here I am doing what every woman probablydoes to him. Trying to fix him, wanting him to change so they can be together.

I feel so stupid.

I hop off of the work area and wipe my eyes before I race for the door.

“Mia, wait,” I hear his soft voice. “I’m sorry.”

I don’t stick around to hear him out. I can’t. My heart feels like someone just sucker punched my chest. This all too familiar feeling that hits. One where I realize I’m more into the guy than he is into me. The story of my damn life.

I take off for the house into a slow jog as tears continue to spill.

“Mia,” his voice says from right behind me. Then I feel his warm hand on my elbow. I stop and turn around. He’s breathing heavily and has a pained expression on his face. “I’m sorry…I just…” He runs a hand through his hair and looks up at the sky. “Fuck.”

His eyes move back to mine. “Look, that came out wrong. I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

I wrap my arms around myself and look away. “It’s fine. You’re right. I stuck my nose in your business. You were upfront from the beginning.”

I try to step away, but he grabs my hand. “I need you to know. You’re not like any other woman I’ve been with. I have feelings for you. I care about you.”

I laugh sharply. “Yeah, I feel like I’ve heard that one before. I get lots ofI care about you’sin life. I’m easy to care about. Not easy to love apparently.”

I pull my hand out of his and run to the house with my all too familiar broken heart.

Chapter Twenty-Five

Eric

I knew this was going to blow up in my face. It was exactly why I tried to stay away from her from the beginning. Nothing about it seemed like a good idea.

But it was impossible to stay away then, and it’s impossible now.

I run through the grass with no shirt, the autumn chill reminding me of that fact. I kick off my work boots and run upstairs.

The door to her bedroom is closed. I don’t think twice as I whip the door open. She’s standing by the window as sobs wrack her body, shoulders shaking. I feel it in my own body. I move towards her until I can wrap my arms around her, pulling her body into mine.

“Mia, I’m so damn sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

She doesn’t embrace me back and the disappointment is overwhelming. I let her cry on my bare chest, feeling her tears dampen my skin.

I let her cry until I feel her body soften and the tears stop. Then I gently tug her hair, so she is looking up at me. Her face is red and puffy from her tears, but she is still more beautiful than words can express.

“Look, I don’t know what is happening between us. I won’t deny that you’ve changed me in the short time that you’ve been here. I’m sorry I snapped at you. I suck at talking feelings. I used to be good at it. But I’m a different person than I was two years ago. My ex leaving me like that changed me. I wish I was a better man. One that can live up to your expectations.”

“It’s not my expectations. I was just trying to help you.”

“I know. I just—I don’t know. I don’t have any excuse. I wish I was different for you.”

I let my forehead fall to hers and pull her closer to me. “Please, Mia. Don’t hate me. I don’t think I could handle it if you did.”

She reaches up and lightly brushes her lips on mine. I try to inhale a breath, but my chest shakes with emotion. I’m starting to fear the worst. That maybe these feelings I have for her are far beyond caring.

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