Page 9 of The First Time

I close my eyes and try to think of something else, anything else, but the placement of her hand. All that does is heighten my sense of smell, and I recognize her fruity, floral scent. It only makes my situation worse.

I need her to move.

“Umm,” I cough as I squirm in my seat. “Yeah, it’s beautiful.”

She looks over at me with a smile on her face. I can see the moment she recognizes how uncomfortable I am, and her smile instantly fades. She moves back to her side of the seat. Guilt begins to gnaw at me. I hate that I’m the reason she lost thatbeautiful smile on her face. If only she knew why I had to put an end to the moment.

The cab driver stops in front of our hotel.

“Here we are,” he says in his thick Italian accent.

We get our bags out of the trunk, and I look up at our hotel. It looks like a large palace on the side of a mountain. It’s made out of some kind of white limestone with large Roman columns in the front.

Rolling into the front lobby is much of the same. I follow the red carpet up to the front desk.

“Hi, we’re here to check in,” I tell the woman standing behind the counter.

She looks young, maybe in her early twenties. Her name tag says Milana.

“Ciao. Benvenuti. Welcome,” she smiles brightly. “Are you checking in?”

I turn to Layla. “Is it under your name?”

“Layla Williams,” she ignores me, speaking directly to Milana.

“Ah, I see. Right here. A suite with a terrace and hot tub. King bed. A lovely view for your two,” Milana says.

I look over at Layla, her eyes are wide. “Um, there was a last-minute change of plans. I was supposed to be here with my best friend. Is there any chance we could change to a new room that has two beds? Or maybe even two separate rooms?”

“Yes,” I interject emphatically. “Two rooms would be best.”

Milana looks between the two of us with concern. “I’m sorry, I’m not sure we have an extra room available for the length of your stay. Let me check.”

The silence is deafening as she types away on her computer. I don’t even risk another glance at Layla. I’m still trying to come down from the incident in the cab. If that’s all it takes to get me going, there’s no way I could survive sleeping in the same bed with her for an entire week.

I wonder if she sleeps naked or maybe she just wears a tank top and her underwear. Fuck, I love it when girls do that.

Please, tell me there’s two rooms. I don’t know if I could even survive two beds, knowing she’s in the bed next to me.

“We do have an extra room,” she says.

Thank God! I take the much-needed breath that I was holding.

“The cost is one thousand nine hundred euros a night for six nights. Would you like me to book it?”

What the hell? What kind of hotel are we staying at? That number is outrageous. There’s no way I can afford it. That’s like sixteen thousand dollars. The all too familiar shameful feeling washes over me as I realize I could never give this woman next to me the life she deserves.

I’m sure her douchebag ex-boyfriend William would be able to spend that kind of money in a heartbeat. Her mom would probably love it if Layla were here with William. Just goes to show he was right all those years ago.

I have to speak up and admit the sad fact that I just can’t swing that kind of money on a room.

“Are you kidding me?” Layla gasps before I can admit defeat. “That is outrageous. I knew I shouldn’t have trusted Charlotte with the rooms. I know Asher told me he would handle it, but I just didn’t think they would spend so much.”

“Does that mean…” I start to speak but have trouble saying the words out loud.

“That we’re shacking up together in one bed?” she finishes for me. “Are you willing to pay that kind of money just to avoid being in the same room as me?”

I feel like that’s a trick question. If I had the money to spend carelessly, fuck yes. But I can’t tell her that I don’t trust myself around her. She still thinks I can’t stand her, that I feel nothing towards her, and that is how it needs to stay.

---