Page 35 of Falling for Grace

“Gracie, I have some bad news,” she says, her voice cracking.

“What is it?” I ask, dread already taking residence in my stomach.

Oh God… I don’t know why, but I know what she’s about to say.

She hasn’t said the words, but I know, I know that something’s happened to Danny.

“What’s happened to him?” I ask, my voice sounding thick as I try to talk past the lump in my throat.

“Danny took his life yesterday.” The words come through in slow motion. My world tilts on its axis and there is now ringing in my ears.

I need to say something, I need to acknowledge what she has just told me, but I can’t speak, I can’t think. I can’t see my bedroom through the tears.

“Gracie, did you hear me?”

Theresa comes through the door at that very moment, her eyes hitting mine, widening. Sue is still talking to me down the phone, but I’m in this weird trance, unable to function apart from the tears building behind my eyes and falling down my cheeks.

“Grace?” Theresa asks as she approaches carefully.

Sue is asking me things, Theresa is asking me things, but I’m just staring and listening to the blood rush through my ears along with this weird ringing sound.

At least I think it’s blood. I’m not sure what else it could be.

Tears stream down my face and I try to swallow down this huge lump, its massive and as soon as I try to swallow again it moves and I know that I’m about to throw up. I lunge off the bed, throwing the phone to the duvet as I bolt out the room to the bathroom.

With shaking hands, I flush the toilet and close the lid and I just sit there.

I feel suddenly exhausted. My poor tired brain tries to take in the news that Danny, my Danny, the Danny I grew up with and knew for fifteen years, is dead.

But not just dead, no—he has killed himself.

Just after I finally called him. Three years too late.

And I can’t help but wonder, did my call cause it?

Chapter 13

“Gracie?” Theresa’s head pops around the toilet door, and she heads over to the sink, grabbing my toothbrush off the side and covering it with toothpaste. I take it willingly and let the mint take over the horrible taste.

“I’ve told Sue you’ll call her back.”

I rinse my mouth and sit on the toilet. Theresa sits on the side of the bath.

“Thank you.”

“It’s on the news, just so you know,” she says, her eyes full of sympathy. “I mean, not the BBC or anything, but you know the Gossip Headlines and E!, that sort of stuff.”

I nod. Of course it is.

“That’s why I was coming to see you, I didn’t know whether you knew.”

I shake my head and fresh tears start to fill my eyes. She throws her arms around me.

“I had no idea you were so close.”

“Why would you,” I say through broken sobs. “It’s part of the past I’ve been so desperately trying to hide.”

“We all have a past, Grace. You can talk to me, you know that.”

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