Page 104 of The Shadow Wand

“Well, he’s rather incapacitated at the moment.”

The side of Lukas’s mouth curls up, a hard glint forming in his eyes.

Oh, he likes this idea—sticking it to Damion while he’s laid up.

“Is that a yes?” I press.

“It will lure him to me.” His smile widens, and it raises the hairs on the back of my neck. His chilling look is the face of a predator in the brush just before an attack. “He and I seem to have left mattersunfinishedbetween us. Yes, Elloren. We can bring Aislinn Greer.”

For a moment, I sense the full extent of the vast power that thrums beneath his skin—the full, unbridled danger of him. Yes, my power dwarfs his, but his is still staggering in its potency. And firmly under his control. Unlike mine.

Intimidation rises over the thought of being intimate with him. It’s bad enough to be jumping into bed with someone mainly to escape from the Western Realm, but this...this will be like bedding a tiger. A tiger with overwhelming fire power.

“Lukas... I...” For a moment, I can’t collect myself, the memory of how overwhelmingly explosive it feels just to kiss him only heightening my apprehension. “I’ve never been with anyone before.” I gesture vaguely from him to me. “Not in the way we’re planning.” I search for some glimmer in his eyes that he grasps what I’m alluding to.

He cocks an eyebrow.

“It’s just...” I try again, to no avail. It’s difficult and embarrassing to try to share such private thoughts with him, as Gardnerians just don’t speak of such things. And if I can’t eventalkabout this, how in the world am I going to jump clear into bed with him?

I straighten and unsuccessfully try to equal his penetrating gaze. “I want to beclear. You need to take things at my pace with this.”

Lukas looks surprised, but his voice, when it comes, is low and reassuring. “Of course.”

“You can be unpredictable and aggressive,” I counter.

His expression has turned serious, his deep-green eyes gilded by the firelight. “Elloren, I won’t be. Not with this.”

His unexpectedly caring tone dredges up something raw and vulnerable inside me. I bite my lip as tears sting my eyes once more.

Lukas pushes a loose strand of my hair behind my shoulder and moves closer, his gaze searching, his words low and firm. “We won’t fully seal our fasting until I’ve set you at ease.”

“Bring spirits,” I say, remembering the soothing effect of Valasca’s tirag.

“I’ll bring some wine,” Lukas offers.

“Strongwine,” I press.

“Elloren,” Lukas says as he caresses the side of my neck, his touch featherlight, his expression kind, “you won’t need it.”

My whole body is tense, but I manage a tight nod.

Lukas looks at me quizzically, his brow furrowed. The side of his lip pulls up a fraction as his silken voice lowers to a more intimate register and he leans in close. “You don’t need to worry, Elloren. I’m skilled at this.”

His attempt at reassurance has exactly the opposite effect. Mortification spikes and I take a step back from him. “I don’t want to know that about you. I don’t want to be one more...conquestof yours.” Images of Lukas with other women flit through my mind. I swallow, wildly uncomfortable as I look toward the curtained window, at the firelit floor, anywhere but at him as I’m faced with the uneasy realization that Lukas has never once told me that he loves me. And I’ve never once said it to him. “I wanted to share this with someone who itmattersto,” I say, my voice catching.

Lukas caresses my arm. “Itwill.” His voice is strong and sure, a tendril of his fire reaching out for me.

I shake my head, not able to meet his eyes. “You don’t understand. You can’tpossibly.I wanted this...to besignificant.”

With someone I love and who loves me.

With Yvan.

When I finally look back up at Lukas, there’s a storm of emotion in his eyes that’s so intense a flush spreads down my neck. There’s strong hurt there. And I’m surprised and chastened by the realization that I’ve inadvertently landed such a stinging blow.

“Lukas, I’m sorry...”

His hand falls away and he straightens, as if collecting himself. But I can feel the turbulent emotions that are now coming off of him in waves. His struggle for control is visible in the rigid way he’s holding himself, in his palpable attempt to bring his suddenly unbridled fire under rein.

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