Page 39 of Curveball

For a few long awkward moments, there are no sounds but our heavy breathing.

Her face is still buried in my neck, our sweaty chests stuck together. I start to pull away, but she tightens her hold on me and whispers, “I know what this means. Let me have one more minute.”

I keep my arms wrapped around her and pretend for the entire sixty seconds that I’m a normal man and am capable of giving her normal things. That a woman like Ripley St. James telling me she loves me is the best day of my life, not the beginning of the end.

I take deep breaths to inhale her scent, knowing I likely won’t get to do it again.

When we eventually pull away, I see that her face is covered in tears. “I didn’t mean to say it, but I can’t lie and tell you that I don’t mean it.” She nervously licks her lips. “I’m in love with you, Quincy. I won’t pretend otherwise anymore.”

I pull away from her. I can’t say this while her body is touching mine. While I’m still inside her.

I place her on the bed, stand, and run my fingers through my hair. “Why couldn’t you leave it be? We had a good thing going.”

She pulls her knees to her chest and looks up at me with sad eyes. “Because I want more. I love you. I can’t bewith anyone else because of my feelings for you. I don’t want to. Why can’t we just be together? For real.”

“Because we don’t want the same things in life. I was never unclear on this arrangement, Ripley.”

She slowly nods. “I know, but I suppose I was hoping you loved me too, and that it would change things for you.” She swallows. “I see that it hasn’t.”

“If we can just go back—”

She shakes her head and takes a deep breath. “No, we can’t. I’m happy this happened. Maybe it will help me finally break free. I can’t keep doing this to myself. I’ve spent more than three years being your dial-a-fuck and nothing more. You go out and do god knows what with all these women, while I can’t bring myself to go near another man. It makes me sick to my stomach to have to pretend like I don’t love you. It makes me sick to my stomach to lie to my best friend. I need to love you in the open or not at all. I need you to love me back or let me go.”

Opening and closing my mouth a few times, I start to feel tears well in my eyes as I whisper, “I’m so sorry.”

Her chin sinks to her chest. “Are you embarrassed to be seen with me? Is that what this is? Handsome, perfect, superstar Quincy Abbott, who can have any woman he wants, saddled with an overweight, mediocre woman.”

My heart sinks. “Is that really what you think?”

She stands and wraps herself in a robe before gathering my clothes from the floor. Handing them to me, she croaks out, “It’s what I know. I need you to leave. I need you to stop calling me every few weeks when you need someone to fall into bed with her legs wide open for you. Obviously you’ll always be in my life to some extent. I love Arizona too much to walk away from youcompletely, but we’ll be cordial when we need to be, nothing more.” She steels her shoulders, being the strong woman I know her to be. “Let me go. It’s time.”

“Short—”

“Don’t call me that. It’s special to me. It’s our secret name, but now it’s tainted, and I can’t hear it again. You only call me that in private because you won’t love me in public.” She begins to walk into her bathroom. “Goodbye, Quincy. Don’t be here when I come back out. Lose my number.”

She closes the bathroom door behind her. My heart fucking hurts, which is exactly how I know she’s right. It’s time to end this.

I hear her sobbing behind the door. Desperate to go to her, but knowing it’s a mistake, I get dressed and walk out of her life.

PENNSYLVANIA

THE PHILADELPHIA YEARS

CHAPTER EIGHT

QUINCY – AGE 32 {RIPLEY – AGE 27}

Iwas traded to the Philadelphia Cougars a few days ago. Frankly, it’s a welcome change. My team in Houston was young and in a rebuilding phase. The Cougars are a little older and contenders for the World Series this season. There’s a lot of talent on the team.

Harold Greene, the longtime owner, said I’ll slot right into their starting rotation. The season doesn’t start for a few months. I moved early so that I have time to acclimate to my new team and my new city. Arizona plays professional softball for a team out of Southern California. I certainly have no need to go to my parents’ house, so I find myself in Philly well ahead of our start date.

I grew to love the city of Houston, but it was time to leave. Running into Ripley became harder and harder. She’s barely spoken to me since that day well over a yearago in her bedroom. The pain in her face when she sees me is unbearable.

Even while we both were there for Arizona when Marc left her at the altar, she maintained a cold distance from me. Now I don’t have any reason to see her at all. She’s in Houston, I’m in Philadelphia, and Arizona is single, in Southern California. I think it’s all for the best.

Philly is now my home, and I’m excited about this fresh start.

I’m in athletic shorts and no top as I begin the daunting task of unpacking and getting settled into my new apartment when there’s a knock at the door. I open it to see an adorable elderly lady holding a huge golden-colored Great Dane. He reminds me of Diamond.