Page 24 of Faking the Book Boyfriend

The two of them laugh, thinking that I’m joking, but I’m not. Gemma Fairchild is the perfect woman, and I want her as mine. I’m willing to do whatever it takes.

I take a deep breath and nod my head toward his bar area. “I need whiskey before we go. There’s no way I can do this sober.”

After downing about half a bottle of whiskey and feeling very numb, we make our way to the dick-piercing store down on South Street. Layton and Cheetah downed the other half of the bottle, claiming that they couldn’t watch this sober.

We sit in the lobby area while browsing the piercing store’s brochure. I had no clue that there were so many options when it comes to getting your dick pierced.

We’re waiting there for at least twenty minutes. My nerves are starting to get the best of me, but I’m determined to see this through.

Cheetah remarks, “I read one of her books. The guy talks dirty. Like,reallydirty. Maybe she’s into that.”

“She said she writes about the kind of men she likes. I ordered all her books. I think it will be a good way to get to know what she’s into.”

Cheetah scoffs. “I’ve been telling you guys for years that romance novels are like instruction manuals for women. You never listen.”

“I never needed to…until now.”

We’re interrupted by a woman with a nasally voice shouting from one of the piercing rooms, “Next.”

I wipe my sweaty palms on my jeans as the three of us walk back into the room. It looks like a makeshift doctor’s office with an examination table. My knees are literally shaking. The woman has pink hair, black lipstick, and a thousand piercings all over her body. I can’t believe I’m about to let this woman poke a hole in my dick.

I close my eyes and think about what Gemma looked like walking to the table. Her sexy body. The way she smelled. The way she made me laugh. And I love how smart she is. Perfection.

I open my eyes feeling resolute. This is for Gemma.

The piercing woman chews her gum loudly as her eyes move up and down my body. She gives me an unimpressed look. In a Philly accent, she asks, “First time?”

I nod.

“Prince Albert, I assume?”

I nod again. “It seems like it’s the best one to get.”

She nonchalantly shrugs. “I suppose it’s a good gateway drug. It will wet yas appetite.” She winks. “Pun intended.”

“And it’s pleasurable for the woman, right?”

She pops her gum and smiles. “Ya bet, stud.”

Cheetah asks, “What about the man? Is it pleasurable or painful for him?”

One corner of her mouth raises. “After it heals, yas will have the best orgasms of yas life. Money-back guarantee. And once it’s healed, yas can take it in and out freely. It’s easy.”

That makes sense to me. Playing baseball with jewelry in my dick could be problematic. It’s good that I can take it out for games. I cringe at the notion of sliding headfirst and anything…catching. Pulling. Tearing. I get the shivers thinking about it.

I take a few deep breaths, feeling like I might pass out.

This is for Gemma. This is for Gemma.

I keep repeating it in my head. I think of her gorgeous face. How much I want to please her. Fuck, how am I already so far gone for this woman? I just met her.

And then I think of her big lips wrapped around the piercing. Oh shit, that would be hot.

Stop. I don’t need a chub in here.

Layton slaps my back, bringing me back to reality. “It’s not too late. You can back out.”

“No. I’m doing this.” I look back at her. “What’s the recovery time?”

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