Page 19 of Faking the Book Boyfriend

He contemplates for a moment before answering, “One who doesn’t judge me for my job.”

“Your job?” That’s interesting. “Being a plumber is a noble profession. But I’ve never had a plumber who looks like you.”

He looks like a porn plumber where the dirty housewife has her wicked way with him while he’s on his back, working under her kitchen sink.

Damn it. I need to stop watching so much porn.

He briefly looks away. I know that means he’s not being truthful. He’s searching for a lie right now.

Leaning back, I say, “This doesn’t work if you’re not honest with me. In the words of Thomas Jefferson,honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom. It’s a trait I value above all others.”

“I’ve never had a date quote Thomas Jefferson before.”

“This isn’t a date. It’s a business meeting.”

He holds his hands up. “You’re right. I’m sorry. This is as new to me as it is to you. It’s hard for me to articulate the right woman. I’m still figuring it out myself.”

“Fair enough, but this isn’t a matchmaking service. I want to make sure you realize that. I need you to be here for the right reasons, Trey.”

“My intentions are noble, I assure you. I’m just looking to understand you better.”

“Understand who better?”

He quickly corrects himself. “Women. I’m looking to understand women better. I saw your video, and everything about it was appealing to me. I’m here to learn from the expert.”

I hold up my left hand and wiggle my ringless ring finger. “I’m hardly an expert. I barely even date. My doctor asked me last week if there’s any chance that I’m pregnant. I responded that if I am, I’d be giving birth to batteries.”

He lets out a loud laugh. “Right, you’re a rom-com author. You’re funny.”

I smile. “I try. But in all seriousness, all I’m offering is to show you what women find so appealing about book boyfriends. There’s no magic formula. It’s up to you to decide which of those attributes makes sense for you. I’m not encouragingyou to act in a way inconsistent with your own personality. We want an enhanced and enlightened Trey, not a deceitful Trey. Does that make sense?”

He nods. “I understand. How do we get started?”

“Tell me a little about yourself.”

He blows out a breath. “Well, I’m twenty-nine. I enjoy sports, especially football, and my job. I have an older sister who I’m close to, a niece who’s my favorite person in the world, and a baby nephew who’s just finding his voice. My parents divorced when we were teens. My sister and I relied on each other a lot.”

I nod in understanding. “Mine divorced when I was a teen too. It’s no walk in the park. You’re lucky you had a sister to rely on. It can be very lonely.”

“No siblings?”

I shake my head. “No, but I’m close with my grandmother. I spent a lot of time with her when I needed a break from the madness. Where do you live, Trey?”

“Umm, in the city.”

“Do you have many friends?”

He smiles. It’s the most genuine one he’s given me yet, and it’s adorable. “I do. I have a great group of friends. Most of them are still single too. We have fun together.”

“What’s your definition of fun?”

“Like I said, sports. Mostly hanging out with my crew. Going to clubs and bars. Nothing extraordinary. I travel a little when I can, but I’m just a normal twenty-nine-year-old guy.”

“I understand.”

I’m still unclear why a man like him needs help, but I decide to stay the course and see how this plays out. “Let’s talk book boyfriends. We’re cracking the code on what fictitious men have that real men don’t. For today, I just planned to get to know you a little bit and then educate you on some romance novel terminology. Are you familiar with the wordtrope?”

“No. Should I be?”

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