Page 48 of Faking the Book Boyfriend

“What’s an example of something that causes a third-act breakup?”

He deadpans. “Lying. Miscommunication. Anything deceitful. Does any of this ring a bell? I’m sorry to be the one to tell you, but you’re definitely headed for a third-act breakup.”

My shoulders fall. “Shit. How do I avoid it?”

He twists his lips. “Well, the worst thing is for her to find out the truth from someone else, not you. That makes it harder. Youhaveto be the one to tell her. It’s your best shot at no third-act breakup.”

Layton walks out of the cage. “Maybe she won’t be upset. Dating a baseball player is a turn-on for a lot of women.” He smirks. “I would know.”

He and Cheetah high-five, but then I get a whiff of a nasty smell. “Lancaster, your batting glove stinks.”

Cheetah chuckles. “If his hand smells from sweating, how do you think his dick feels right about now in this hot as fuck room?”

I smile. These guys are too funny sometimes.

I don’t know what to do to avoid our third-act breakup. I’m thinking maybe I need her to fall madly in love with me so she’ll never want to break up. If she’s in love and then I gently slip in that I’m a professional baseball player worth millions of dollars, perhaps it won’t be as bad as Cheetah thinks. After all, those are romance novels. They necessitate drama. This is real life. We don’t need a dramatic event.

Incidentally, I’m also thinking that I need all the second-act sex I can get.

GEMMA

It’s late morning and I’m fruitlessly working on a contract. I can’t get my evening with Trey out of my mind. The highlights keep replaying like a movie trailer. The hottest sex of my life. Where do I go from here?

The way he touched me. The way he worshiped me. The way he made me come…over and over again.

I fan my face. Is it getting hot in here?

I slowly run my fingers over my desk. Darian and Jackson always have sex in her office. I’ve never even considered it for myself. I almost laugh at the notion of Aiden and I having sex on my desk. He’d be all uptight about the papers and files.

Two years with Aiden, and I never wanted him half as much as I wanted Trey.Stillwant Trey.

How did I let myself go twenty-nine years without the type of passion I shared with him in one single night? As a romance author, I’m disappointed in myself.

I begin imagining what a romance book scene would be like in my office with Trey. I would kill to have him take me right here. To bend me over all my files and fuck me senseless while the papers fly all over the place and neither of us gives a shit. I make a mental note to write an office sex scene tonight while the fantasy is fresh in my mind.

I’m running through all the small details of what it would look like when my cell phone buzzes. I pick it up to see that it’s ourPervertsgroup.

Libby: What’s the best lube on the market? JoJo and Ava need not answer. I know Gemma probably has them ranked somewhere.

JoJo: Not me with a bowl of popcorn waiting for the answer from Gemma.

Ava: Yep. This is going to be epic. Gemma, you were born to answer this question.

Me: Well, if you must know… I prefer überlube. It works well and is easier to wash off afterward than other, more popular lubes like Astroglide. It also doesn’t stain your sheets. Beginners often like Intimate Earth Ease because it also relaxes the anal opening, but I don’t care for it.

Libby: Because your anus is plenty relaxed.

Me: Don’t knock fifth base ’til you try it, Lubey Libby. If you don’t like actual oil, you can use SUTIL. It’s water-based, but it doesn’t work as well.

Libby: überlube for the win.

Me: And it’s on Amazon. You can have it in hours in case of emergency…so I’ve heard.

JoJo: Emergency anal. That’s a new one.

Me: When you want it, you want it.

Our silly texts are interrupted by Andrew buzzing me from the front desk. “Ms. Fairchild, there’s someone here to see you.”

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