Page 36 of Regrets

“That’s me.”

He looks down at me in his lap. “This is you. Why do you hide that from them?”

“I’m a trainwreck, Linc. And you know it. You’ve always known it.”

He looks pained. “You’re P. And so what if you’re fucked-up. We all are.”

I see a trace of him from before everything was ruined. The asshole who was sweet enough to talk me into moving into his family’s house because he wanted me to feel safe. “Your familyhas been ripped apart, Linc.” Our eyes are locked as I look up at him. “This is all our fault.”

“Stop saying that.”

“You know it’s true.”

It’s a cold, harsh whisper because he knows the truth like I do.

What we did destroyed us all.

19

PENELOPE

ONE YEAR AGO

Ican’t believe we’re here, that we made it to our senior prom. The years have flown by, and we’re no longer two nine-year-old best friends.

We’re both eighteen, graduating in a couple of weeks, and then going off to college.

We’ve both worked extremely hard in school. I was awarded a few grants for college, but because Colt’s parents are incredible, they’re picking up the rest of the cost for my education.

I’ll pay them back someday.

Prom was fun, but I’m more excited about the afterparty. The Sterlings have allowed us to go with several friends to their massive lake house in the Ozarks. We vacation here every summer with the family, so we’re familiar with it. They’ve done the same for Linc the last three summers as a reward for studying hard in college.

Although, I don’t believe Linc is studying all that hard.

He’s been home a few times but has mostly stayed at school. Part of me misses him, and the other part of me is relieved.

I can’t take his torture.

Unfortunately, I think he and his friends will be at the lake tonight too, considering he just finished his sophomore year at college, but I’m not thinking about Linc.

I smile as Colt holds my hand, and we drive down the curvy road toward the luxurious lake house. We changed out of our prom attire before we started our drive. He’s now in a polo and jeans, and I’m wearing jeans and a cute strapless, flowy, white cropped top.

My hair is still in the professional updo Nora insisted on paying for, along with a manicure and pedicure. This morning, she and I had a girl’s day that I will hold with me forever.

When our car and the five cars full of our friends arrive at the house, it’s not long before the party is in full swing. I look around the fancy lake house and really hope our asshole friends don’t totally destroy the Sterling’s second home.

The house is full of people, and I swear some of them I don’t recognize. They could be Linc’s friends or people from other houses and cabins around the lake, but all I’m thinking about is Colt, who’s tucked against me on the sofa in the living room. He has a beer in his hand, but he hasn’t had much of it, always responsible and in control.

I haven’t had much either, but I did take a fruity shot or two and feel warmness in my cheeks from the liquor.

“Colt.” I lean into his ear and feel him smile, his arm wrapped around me. “Let’s go find somewhere we can be alone.”

I feel him tense slightly as he hugs me closer. He’s been quiet the last few weeks, and I’m sure it has something to do with graduation coming up and us going to college soon. His father wants him to do well in school and eventually take over their family’s financial firm.

His lips brush over my temple as he turns his head, and his mouth dips to my ear. “Don’t you want to spend time with our friends?”

I shake my head, my eyes meeting his. “No.”

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