Page 87 of Regrets

“You mean prom night?”

Well, fuck. “How do you know about that?”

“I was there. I caught a ride with Johnny.” That fucker was in Colt’s class but hung out more often with Ash.

“What did you see?”

“Why, Linc? You want to try to lie about it?”

I shake my head and stand on the opposite side of the island, looking him in the eye. “No. I just want it all out there.”

“I saw you follow her down the hallway and then pull her into Mom and Dad’s bedroom. And you guys didn’t come out for a long time.” He’s angry, and I don’t blame him. I’d be pissed if the situation were reversed for many reasons. “He was there. In the same house. You fucked her under the same roof.”

“I know. Maybe it wasn’t right, but I’m not sorry.”

“Of course, you’re not. You’re never fucking sorry for anything.”

“I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m fucking sorry that Colt would be crushed. But no, I’m not sorry. Please understand, I don’t want to lose another brother. But for P, I will. I love her. I’ve always loved her.”

“He was still alive.” I recognize the pain in my little brother’s eyes, and it guts me.

“I know. And I wish he still was.”

He scoffs, gesturing toward the front of the house. “Why? Now you get his girl.”

“She was never his.”

He looks pained by my statement, but I need him to hear it. And I hear Penelope and my mom enter the kitchen, but I don’t look behind me.

“Linc . . .”

I hear Penelope’s warning and turn to her, knowing they all need to hear it, including her. “You were never his. You loved him. I know that, but you were always trying to be his Sweet Pea.” My eyes lock on hers. “But you never were.”

I see my mom starting to look uneasy, but she doesn’t interrupt me.

I walk across the kitchen to P when her eyes drop to the floor. I use my hand to lift her chin. “You always had an edge like me. You’ve always been strong.” As far as I’m concerned, Penelope and I are the only two in the room as I look into her beautiful blue eyes. “And you’ve always been mine. You just didn’t know it.”

Her smile is sad as I lay a kiss on her lips and turn to my mother.

“But we did love Colt.”

She nods. “I know you did. We all did.” She moves to my side, placing a hand on my shoulder. “And I always worried about this. Seeing you two and the looks, seeing the love. And loving both of my sons,” she turns to P, “and Penelope.”

Penelope tears up. “I didn’t want to cause any of you pain.”

My mom smiles and stands in front of P, brushing her cheek with her hand. “Oh Penelope, you didn’t. You loved both of my boys with everything you had. You showed them both who they were, and I know Colt struggled deeply with demons I should have helped him with before it was too late. But sweet girl, he didn’t give you the love you deserved. He wasn’t able to.”

“How can you say that? He was going to marry her?”

My mom turns to Ash. “You’re young. Very young. And stubborn, but believe me, marriage does not always equal love. Colt did love her, and he was an incredible man, but he wasn’t ready for her.”

“So, Colt’s dead, and Linc gets the girl. And we’re all supposed to be happy with this?”

My mom smiles sadly. “Colt would want us to be. He was one of the kindest people I ever knew. Sadly, he was too much like me, always wanting to make everything perfect. But life is messy, Asher. You’ll see.”

Asher shakes his head, turning angrily and going into the backyard.

My mom’s eyes close briefly, and then she takes a deep breath, looking at P and me. “I love your love. I hate that Colt is gone, and as a mother, I can’t believe that was fate because he should be here.” My mother and P are softly crying, but my mom remains strong. “Still, I do believe with all of my heart that it’s you two that should be together. I saw it from the beginning. You have a love that will last.”

---