Page 2 of Someday Not Soon

“It sounds too horrible to say out loud.”

“Nothing can shock me. You could tell me youbelieved the earth was flat, and I still wouldn’t blink an eye. So spit it out.”

I sigh, forcing the words out, that my brain is yelling at me to never say aloud. “I’m sad they’re gone. But I’m also really, really pissed. Like how could theybothgo on the same day? I know it wasn’t like they could have planned it, but still. Their house is a disaster. They’re in a decent amount of debt. Now everything falls on my shoulders. At this rate, I’ll be stuck here in this mess for months. And I really,reallydon’t want to deal with any of this right now.” I shrug. “We rarely spoke. I didn’t even know if they wanted to be buried or cremated.”

“Which option did you choose?”

“Cremation. It was cheaper.”

“Solid choice, there’s something creepy about bodies decomposing while in formal attire.” She grabs my hand and pulls me up straight, before adjusting my dress back into place. “This sucks, we can all agree on that. But you’ve got this. Take it one day, one decision, at a time. There’s no wrong way to feel about a situation like this—it’s all survival mode at this point. And we’re here for you. Always.”

“When did you get so wise?”

“Cole must’ve injected it into me through his magical penis.”

This time, a real laugh escapes. “Oh god. Please stop there.”

“You sure? I’ve got at least thirty more good dick jokes on file in my brain right now.”

“Positive.” Glancing at the door, the thought ofreentering the war zone of my mother’s most condemnatory friends fills me with dread.

Delaney must see the hesitation written all over me, as she grabs my shoulders and spins me in the opposite direction of the church hall. She pushes me toward the parking lot and spanks my ass. “Go. You’ve done your time. It’s all wrapping up anyways. Madi and I got this and we’ll clean up.”

“I should stay—” There’s not one ounce of me thatwantsto stay, but the people pleasing side of me knows what Ishoulddo. Everyone will talk if I’m not there until the last person leaves. They’ll believe whatever lies my mother surely told them about me being an absent daughter.

She hands me my purse that she somehow magically knew to bring out here with her. “Go have a drink. Take a bath. Masturbate. Do what you need to do to get through this. And don’t you dare set foot back in there. Let us do this, let us help you.”

I fold faster than a deck of cards. “Fine. Thank you.” Before parting ways, I embrace her, recognizing that my best friends are more like family to me than my own parents ever were. Thank goodness for that shared crush on the boy who never even knew we existed all those years ago. It gave me two friendships that have felt more like family than anything I’ve ever known.

Turning to the pink azalea-lined pathway that leads to the parking lot, I hear her voice call out from several yards away. “And hey, don’t forget Jude lives in Lawson again.Just in case you need a warm body to cuddle up with tonight.”

Walking away, I flip her off without bothering to look back. The mere mention of his name stops my heart.

Jude—the one person I’ve tried, and failed, to banish from my thoughts for the last ten years. One of the reasons why I ran away from this small town as soon as I got the opportunity.

He remains my tender spot, the one who emotionally wounded me so deeply that it has never fully healed. The one who ruined all my subsequent relationships because they felt like crumbs compared to what I had with him.

Even now, after all these years, the ache of that bruise lingers.

And in this unpredictable world, there’s only one thing I’m absolutely certain of—that I will be going nowhere near him ever again.

Chapter Two

Ella

Past (Ten Years Ago)

I’m sittingin a sticky bar, trying to decide at what point it is socially acceptable to leave a horrendous date. Not even a minute in, and I’m already second-guessing my ability to pick quality romantic partners. His dating profile was charming and his pictures were cute, but the reality of this date is far from that.

Luke arrives thirty minutes late, stumbling into the rustic Depot bar. As he sits in the swiveling barstool, I instantly smell the bourbon and marijuana permeating the air around him. I don’t have anything against alcohol or smoking marijuana. But I have never gone on a date where the guy shows up already wasted and swaying as if he’s on rough ocean waters. It instantly makes me uneasy about the situation.

He looks me up and down once he’s seated, smilinglike a high chipmunk as he nearly topples off his stool. His eyes are stuck on my breasts as he leans in, breathing his rancid bourbon-weed breath in my face. “Wow, you’re hot.”

Trying not to inhale through my nose, I reply, “Thanks. Nice to finally meet you, Luke.”

He repeatedly slaps the wooden bar top and starts laughing, tiny droplets of his spit mist the air. He draws the attention of several bar patrons who throw him hatred-filled glares for being obnoxious. I don’t blame them. If I wasn’t such a people pleaser I would already be out the door and on the way back to the peaceful solitude of my trashy reality shows.

He clears his throat, like he’s at a comedy club and about to deliver a great punchline. “My name’s not Luke. I actually had my sister make my whole profile for me to appeal to the masses. Name’s Marvin Cox, but you can call me Marv.”

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