Page 41 of Home Ice Advantage

And then Aronson began moving, really moving, in earnest, and Ryan wasn’t thinking about much at all anymore.

Ryan was finding that regularly getting the conscious thought railed out of his head had an effect on his day-to-day. It was a lot easier to ignore texts from his father and brothers when he wasn’t just sitting around doing nothing after work. It was a lot easier to remain calm in practice when Aronson was being a dick when Ryan knew that afterward, he could just push Aronson’s head down and make him suck Ryan’s dick.

“What are you smiling about?” Aronson grumbled, back in Boston again, while they were waiting for the guys to finish one of the skating drills.

“Just thinking,” Ryan said cheerfully.

“Aboutwhat.”

“Something to be said for the killing-them-with-kindness approach.”

Aronson shot him a suspicious look, and Ryan did his best to remain blank-faced.

Even with the distraction Aronson provided, the final divorce hearing still snuck up on him before he was ready. The whole process had been relatively painless, considering. His agent had found him a well-respected divorce lawyer; they’d had the conferences where they discussed what Ryan wanted out of the whole process—which was a fair division of assets and nothing more than that. He didn’t want to spend any time fighting with Shannon about it. And now he was driving back to New Hampshire so that the judge could finalize everything.

It would probably be the last time he’d see Shannon for quite a while after, and he wasn’t sure how he felt about the whole thing. She had seemed relieved to close the chapter of their lives together, and he had to admit he was also somewhat relieved to be done. But it still felt strange, to be heading in there in one of his game-day suits, his hair carefully combed, and his collar and tie arranged so that the hickey Aronson had left behind wouldn’t be visible in the courtroom.

The actual divorce hearing went by in a blur; if you had asked him to tell you any details, he would not have been able to recall a single one except for the way Shannon looked, sitting at the opposite table with her lawyer, elegant and composed. Her shoulders relaxed when the judge told them that he had reviewed their paperwork, the submissions of the attorneys, and would be issuing an order in accordance with the recommendations. Ryan’s ears rang, a little, an echo.

Afterward, Shannon crossed the aisle. Behind them, their lawyers had their heads together, talking over some point about the split of assets. Shannon ignored them, came up to hug him. It wasn’t as hard or bone-crushing a hug as the one she’d given him in Newfields, but when she pulled away, she still looked a bit sad. “This is it, huh?”

“This is it,” Ryan said. “You’re officially a free woman.”

“About that...” Shannon looked down at her shoes, twisting one of the many rings she always wore. “I just wanted to be honest with you. Since we’ve been handling all of this so—well. I’m seeing someone. I have been for a few months now.”

“What?” Ryan said, surprised. He’d half considered the possibility before, but never seriously. He wondered if the news would have come as a blow, if life hadn’t fallen into place the way it had.

“I didn’t want to hurt your feelings, it truly wasn’t personal, it just sort of happened. He’s an artist and a sculptor, and we met at a pottery class he was running, and he’s very kind and—”

“Shannon, you don’t have to feel bad about that. It’s fine. I’m just really happy you’re happy, you know? You deserve that.”

She stopped short, surprised. “Well, that’s—that’s very mature, Ryan.”

“I, uh, met someone, too.”

Shannon’s mouth dropped open.“What?”

“It’s pretty new, so.”

“Well, that’s great,” Shannon said, slowly, like she was still trying to process it. She didn’t sound upset, at least. “What’s she like?”

Ryan took a deep breath. The judge had gone back into the robing room behind the bench; the attorneys were still talking about whatever it was attorneys talked about when they didn’t want to gut opposing counsel with a fountain pen, when they weren’t exactly friends but knew each other well anyway.

It was probably a stupid idea to say anything, but he’d never liked hiding things from Shannon, and she had been up-front with him. He didn’t want to think about how it would feel if she reacted badly, so instead he said, all in a rush, “He’s kind of an asshole, sometimes, but it works for me. I guess.”

Shannon stared at him again. “That’s—that’s great, Ryan. Is this—is he someone I’ll be able to meet at some point?”

Ryan shifted, a little uncomfortable. “I don’t know if it’s really like that, right now. I don’t know if you and I are really like that right now. Or ever. But if we’re being honest, I wanted to be honest.” He didn’t know if it would ever really be like that. If he wanted it to be like that. He also didn’t know how to explain it to her. Whether there was even a label he could use. He said in a rush, realizing how it must have sounded, “I’m not—it’s not like I never loved you, like I was never attracted to you. This thing with him—it sort of just happened. I’m learning a lot of things about myself, you know? It’s been pretty weird.”

“I—I can imagine,” Shannon said. She was still looking at him like she’d never seen him before. “You know. This explains a lot of shit about Murph.”

“Murph?” Ryan said, blinking. “This has nothing to do with Murph. What are you talking about? Murph and Tara have been married for years, the same way we were.”

“Oh,Ryan... I think, maybe, you still have a little learning to do.” Ryan stared at her, but she didn’t explain any further. “Okay, well, I’m meeting Jackson for lunch, so I should probably start packing things up here.”

“All right, Shannon.”

Shannon reached out and touched his cheek. “Ryan, I’m just sorry this all didn’t work out. You’re a good man. I hope this—whatever you’re figuring out is making you happy, too.”

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