Page 65 of Delay of Game

He swallowed hard and said,i’m fine. i just went to mike’s house after the game.

The typing periods at the bottom showed up almost immediately, and Zach sighed. He didn’t leave the phone open to see what Nate was typing back, because he didn’t have the heart to answer it.

He found Mike downstairs in the kitchen, still working at the table, just accompanied by breakfast this time. It was weird seeing his teammate in this context, comfortable in his home, intently typing away at some kind of schoolwork.

When he’d first met Mike, his first impression had been that the guy was a shy but intimidating asshole, which wasn’tuntrue. What he’d come to realize later was that Mike had a big fucking heart to go along with the dry sense of humor and devastating fists but made himself incredibly hard to get to know.

In retrospect, most of that made sense. But it was still a big change from the overaged rookie who’d been playing third pairing/7D and keeping secrets from the rest of the team to this guy, a pillar of the blue line and absolutely one of the guys, absentmindedly scratching a cat behind its ears in the kitchen he shared with his boyfriend.

“Uh... I want to apologize again...” Zach said, awkwardly, from the door.

“Reed, seriously, don’t worry about it.” Mike looked up at him, that half smile appearing briefly before it vanished again. “Been there.”

Zach couldn’t really picture Mike, who was probably the toughest person he knew, being anywhere near what Zach was doing last night.

His face must have reflected it, because Mike said, “If it makes you feel any better, one time a bartender cut me off. InBoston.”

“What...the fuck?”

“Last year was a weird fucking year, dude.”

Zach looked around at the kitchen again, at the pictures of Mike and Garcia on the fridge. In one of them, they were in a pool, playing with a little girl that Zach assumed was a relative of Garcia’s. She rode on Mike’s shoulders, hitting Garcia with a pool noodle like a jousting spear. “It seems like it worked out for you.”

“Yeah, well... I dunno, man. Things change when you don’t expect them to. If you know how to ask for what you want.”

He felt vaguely ill in the lowest part of his stomach, again, because there was really no way for things to change for the better for him. And there was especially no way that he could ask for what he wanted, not now. It might have been a joke, but it was close to the truth, and Nate had... Well, Zach had some small shreds of his pride left.

Mike cleared his throat. “There’s coffee, and leftover eggs, if you don’t mind ’em cold.”

“Thanks,” Zach said, and was momentarily overwhelmed with gratitude and sorrow, but after he saw Mike’s face he said, “Don’t worry, you’re not gonna get a repeat of yesterday. I’m, uh... I’m good.”

Mike’s eyebrows were, at best, skeptical. “Okay.”

“I am, I fucking promise. But this is... You’re like, it’s just blowing my mind, kind of? I had no idea, man. Your house is really nice, and you’re in school, and you just seem...different.”

Mike shut the laptop and shrugged. “Of course you had no idea. I mean, I got used to not sharing a lot. Because, you know.”

Zach did know. There was a reason he didn’t go around telling people every aspect of his business, even though he wasn’t anywhere near as careful about it as he probably should have been. Mike had been even more careful, or afraid, because up until he’d sat everyone down in the locker room to tell them, Zach had had no fucking clue he was gay. “But you told everyone...?”

“Shit, I dunno. It’s not like I was going to hide Danny from the fucking team. And it was kind of a relief, honestly. Like a weight off. Didn’t have to hide, didn’t have to lie. To them, at least, and then the rest of it, it’s all on my terms if I want to do more. It was easier than I thought. No one was too shitty about it.”

“I mean. Nate wouldn’t have let them. Oh,fuck.”

“Have some fucking breakfast and let’s not talk about the Cap, eh?”

“Good luck,” Zach muttered darkly. “I mean,youfigured it out.”

“Buddy, I hate to tell you, but if the rest of the team wasn’t so fucking straight,everyonewould’ve figured it out. It’s not like you were really subtle.”

“I was subtle!”

Mike was laughing, which was a sound Zach had only heard on a few occasions last season. More often this year. He had a really nice laugh, surprisingly warm. It made Zach want to smile too, even though he didn’t really feel like smiling. “Bro. Come on. You couldn’t be subtle if your life fuckingdependedon it.”

“No, you’re probably right. But come on, it’s part of my charm.”

Mike poured him a cup of coffee from the pot instead of answering. They drank the coffee in silence before Mike said, “So...what’s the plan?”

“I dunno,” Zach said, looking down into his cup. “I mean. I can’t really stay here. The dogs would miss me. And it’s not like I can avoid it forever. I gotta go home.”

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