Page 48 of Set Me On Fire

I didn’t dare look up, unable to face them down, because Brock was bringing up something I never wanted to revisit.

“You played that bloody song by Gotye over and over.”

“Dun dun dun dun, dundundundundun…” someone started to hum.

“You didn’t come out of your room.”

“You wrote all that poetry.”

I did all the embarrassing things teenage girls do when they feel like their world is collapsing. It didn’t, I didn’t, but that’s not how it felt. I had all this emotion tied up in the idea of Noah, and when it became clear it had nowhere legitimate to go, I had to sit on it, like an emotional bomb my body had to smother.

He broke my heart, I liked to forget that, because it was stupid and cringey and shameful, and I didn’t like myself during that time.

Apparently, neither did my brothers.

I’m not sure if anyone else ever got to me as deep after that. Noah created scar tissue in me that prevented real intimacy. I looked down at my stomach. Now he or one of his friends had put a baby in me, finishing the job. I saw all the dating app profiles where dudes were all like ‘no single mums’ or ‘if he left you and your kid, why should I stay?’ or some crap. If my dating options sucked now, they were going to become non-existent.

But I had a choice.

I didn’t have to do it this way. Mum would help me very quietly, very discreetly make this whole situation go away, and I could go back to trying to find a guy who actually was down to commit to a woman and have kids. Maybe one with a safe government job like Mum always wanted.

I sighed.

That wasn’t going to work, because I didn’t want it. My brothers’ suddenly smothering attention made clear why I was never all that good in relationships. I became so independent because I was always pushing back against them, trying to create a space for myself to experience things. One that wasn’t safe and secure, but was mine.

And I needed to do the same now.

I sucked in a breath and then stared at the table.

“I’m pregnant.” The initial announcement got lost in the conversations happening frantically around the table, so I picked up my knife and tapped the side of my glass, getting all of their attention. “I’m pregnant.”

“You’re…”

You couldn’t take my dad by surprise often, but when his paper napkin fell from limp fingers, I knew I had now.

“You’re what?” Brock’s snarl was so serious that Jamie was up and out of her seat, putting a warning hand on his shoulder. “When?—?”

“Who?” Hayden cut him off, going straight for the important bit according to him. “Who? We haven’t seen you with anyone. No guy has come around here.”

For them to approve of, that went unspoken, which had anger flaring to life. All us McDonalds were slow to anger, but once we did, things went south fast.

“No, I don’t suppose they would’ve.”

“Now everyone needs to calm down,” Mum said, and Dad shot her a dark look. Her composure made clear that she was already in on the situation.

“They?”

Hunter’s head tilted to one side as he regarded me steadily.

“Do not, I repeat, do not say anything stupid.” Jamie tended to be a quiet presence in all this crazy, but she could stand up for herself when she needed to. “Or you’ll be sleeping at your parents’ place tonight, not with me.”

That got their attention, my brothers taking a breath to look at the women they loved for a second.

But not for long.

“Yeah, they.” I sat back in my chair, arms folded, because suddenly I was so damn tired. Too tired to pretend. “I might not have had three guys who’d spent their lives pining after me, but I went to party with Noah Taylor.” The hiss around the table was so damn loud. “He’s a fireman now, one of the ones who put out the fire at The Stafford. I got drunk with him and a few of his mates.”

“No.” Brock shook his head, the look of distress real funny for a bloke who shared my best friend with our other brothers. “No, you didn’t.”