Page 46 of The First Love Myth

Max rolls his eyes. “You two are weird.”

“We know,” Haley says at the same time that I say, “It’s part of our charm.”

This only makes Max’s grin wider. We have this effect on people a lot. It’s why we bonded quickly as roommates and why when I pledged in the spring, there wasn’t even another consideration for my Big. It’s also why there’s no way in hell I’m transferring out of Bellewood. If I have to see Andrew every day for the next three years, watch him date and fall in love and grow and change, I’m going to do it with grace. Bellewood is home. And hopefully, I’ll date and fall in love and grow and change too.

I sneak a look at Max. He’s leaning back against the bleachers, relaxed and happy. When he laughs, I feel it on the riser below. He glances down at me, his eyes meeting mine. It’s a quick look, but it’s like he’s seeing me for the first time all week. He’s all dimples and laugh lines, and I feel that look down to my toes.

“All right, Little.” Next to me Haley stands and stretches before reaching for her bag. The week’s gone too fast, and it feels like today didn’t even happen. “Time for me to hit the road.”

I’m not ready for her to leave. For the silence that will descend as soon as she walks off these bleachers. I’m not ready to be alone again.

“Max,” Haley says turning to him, “it’s been a pleasure.”

He holds out his arms, and without hesitation, she steps into his hug. “Pleasure was all mine.”

I stand then and pull her into a hug of my own. In a few weeks, we’ll be back together. I can do this. “Thank you, Hales. Seriously, this was above and beyond.”

“Nonsense.” She squeezes me tighter. “This is what you do for family.”

“Love you, Big.”

Haley steps away and clasps my hand. “Love you back.”

When the final minivan pulls away from the pickup line at the end of the day, I literally run to my car. The rest of the day lingered, and whatever passed between Max and me in those moments before Haley left dissipated into awkward silence. But my speedy exit doesn’t matter. Before I can even find my keys, Max is at my side.

“Zee, wait.”

My body jerks to life, and oh my god, I hate what that nickname does to me and the way his voice softens and wraps itself around the single syllable. I will my heart to beat normally before facing him. He’s a few paces behind, his expression open but stressed.

“I know we need to talk,” he says, closing the space between us. He doesn’t touch me, but his hands clench and unclench at his sides. “But Haley was always here, and I didn’t know what to say. That night... I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry.”

Sorry?Of all the things I wanted him to say. Sorry?

“I don’t want you to be sorry,” I practically yell.

“Then what do you want?”

That’s the question. What do I want? To go back in time and erase that stupid moment so we can go back to our friendship?To have him lock the door to keep Joe from interrupting? To have him stop calling me Zee and making my insides melt?

What do I want? My stomach flips, and my heart pounds. I want to know. Unequivocally.

“I want you to kiss me.” My feet stay rooted to the ground. It’s my request, but it has to be his choice.

His expression changes from uncertainty to surprise to joy and, finally, determination. How can one person feel so much between one moment and the next? And about me? He cups my face, his fingers soft against my skin. Butterflies sweep across my stomach, and my mind goes blank as he closes the space between us. The world narrows. His lips meet mine, part mine, devour mine. And my world explodes.

This summer, Andrew, Claire, the tears, and the mistakes—they all fade away. Max’s hand is still gentle on my cheek, but his other grasps at my waist and pulls me in close. He smiles against my lips as my arms wrap around his neck and my fingers tug at his hair. I deepen the kiss. Every part of me is on fire. I’m lost in the scent and taste of him, sweaty and salty and purely Max. I didn’t believe, not really, that someone would ever want me again and that I could want them back. But I was wrong. So very wrong. My love life didn’t end when I walked into that dorm room all those months ago. It was set free.

Chapter 38

Liz

God, I need to clean the bathroom. I haven’t seen this many dust bunnies—or is that hair?—in my life. My stomach roils again, and I turn my head from the sight, but it’s too late. I retch into the toilet for the third time. How is there even anything left in my stomach? All I ate today is that wrap from the cafeteria, the same one I’ve been getting every day since I started back at the office. And this isn’t the first time I’ve been sick this week. It can’t be the cafeteria, but then what?

“Again?”

I glance up at Zoey standing in the doorway. Her face is pinched in concern, but her cheeks are flushed, and there’s an almost fevered glint in her eyes.Please don’t be sick. We can’t both be sick.When I look back at her, the frenzy is gone, and only her usual calm expression remains.

“Hi, sister.” I wave because I’m not sure I can lift my head. This is bad.

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