Page 32 of The First Love Myth

“We’re heading out in a minute.” I step back even though I want to hold on forever.

“She’ll be okay.” Jane’s expression softens. “We all survived our first loves.”

“I know, but it shouldn’t bethishard.”

She meets my gaze. A whole lifetime of unspoken words passes between us because it’s always this hard. We just don’t remember it that way.

“Maybe for Zoey, it has to be. Maybe this is the only way she’ll ever be able to move on.” She smiles lightly, her eyes glossed over in a memory of her own. I can guess at it. I was there for the end of Jane’s first love, for the tears and the cocktails and the rebounds. How can these moments feel equally close and like they were lived in another life by another person? A Julian-less life.

“I’m going to have to call in reinforcements,” I say, letting out a sigh, “and change her number.”

“It’s that bad?”

I nod, hating that this is my sister’s truth. “If he texts her again, she won’t be able to resist. Because—”

“That can’t be their ending.” Jane shakes her head, her lips pressed into a thin line. “We let her spend too much time in the editing room with Julian.”

“Yes, we did,” I say with a laugh.

Outside, I can hear Zoey and Cecilia’s low tones. I’m not sure where Julian went, but I haven’t seen him since I arrived, and his shoes aren’t by the door. Maybe this is his way of giving me the space I asked for. He helped, but he doesn’t need to be herewhen I am. A part of me wants to wait it out, to hug him and thank him. But if he wanted that, he would be here.

Instead, I give Jane another hug and then turn to go. She stops me with a hand on my shoulder. I can’t read her expression, which is a first.

“When you leave him,” she says, a shadow passing over her face, “be kind about it, okay?”

“I haven’t decided anything.” I twirl my wedding ring, which I remembered to slip back on before leaving.

Jane gives me a sad smile. “Yes, you have.”

Chapter 28

Liz

Iflop back onto my couch, kick off my shoes, and toe at my socks. After four hours in the car tonight, it feels good to be free. I flex my feet and wiggle my toes. Some of my stress falls away as the tension in my feet releases. Zoey’s tucked into the guest room. Cecilia’s rifling through the fridge, although she’s not likely to find much. All I want is to sleep until Zoey wakes up, begging for nourishment and her phone back. She is not getting the latter. Tomorrow will be a long day—the day after is always worse. Sleep offers peace, peace that crashes into reality seven seconds after you open your eyes.

“Here.” Cecilia waves a plate over me. “You need to eat something.”

“It’s not healthy to eat after midnight,” I say around my small bite of sandwich—peanut butter and jelly, my favorite. “Especially something with this much sugar.”

“Would you eat the sandwich?”

I take an extra big bite. The sugar is a jolt to my system. When I finally swallow, Cecilia hands me a glass of milk. Big sisters can be a splendid thing.

“Thank you for coming with me tonight.”

She waves this away. “You’re going to call Dad in the morning?”

“Yes, I’ll need him to change her number.”

She sits down across from me, leaning forward, elbows on knees. “That’s not what I mean.”

“I’m going to let her stay, Cee, if that’s what she wants.” And a part of me selfishly hopes she’ll stay. The nights are long when you live alone. “I’m not going to hand her off to Dad and throw her right back to Ardena. She needs time away from all of it.”

“I believe she has a job.”

“Cee.”

“I think you’re overreacting a bit.” She bites into her bottom lip. “Projecting your frustrations with Julian onto her.”