Page 67 of An Alien for the Future

“Once you turn them away, they will no longer have the right to attempt to woo you,” Xarion says. “I have already arranged for your farm to be guarded and any Kari that breaks that covenant will be taken care of.”

I close my eyes, releasing a long breath.

Finally, I look at Xarion. “And Tovan?”

Xarion studies me and I know he’s only trying his best. “That…I cannot speak on, Donna Johnson. That is up to you…and the fates.”

Another sigh and I bite my lip. Fuck it. “Fine. Let’s do this.”

As we enter the conference center, the cacophony of voices hits me like a wall. At least fifty Kari are packed into the room, all talking at once. But as soon as I step through the door, a hush falls over the crowd.

All eyes turn to me, a sea of golden gazes filled with hope, curiosity, and something more primal that makes my skin tingle.

I scan the crowd, searching for one particular pair of eyes. My heart begins to fall, dropping to the pit of my stomach and lower, the longer it takes for me to spot him.

Tovan. Where is Tovan?

But he’s not here.

Xarion guides me to a raised platform at the front of the room. As I climb the steps, my legs feel like jelly. What am I supposed to say to them? How can I possibly navigate this impossible situation? And Tovan…

My gaze shifts to my friends, falling on Catherine and I watch her mouth the exact words she just said to me. “The heart knows.”

Only, my heart isn’t in this room anymore. He’s not here.

The ache comes sudden and fast, even as I clear my throat, the sound echoing in the sudden silence. “I, uh... I’m not really sure what to say.”

A low rumble goes through the crowd. I take a deep breath and continue.

“I know you’re all here because the test was…inconclusive. And I know something like this has never happened before. To be honest, I’m as confused as you are.”

I pause, gathering my thoughts. Hell, this isn’t what I’m supposed to be doing. This wasn’t the plan. But as I stand herelooking at all the males before me. Males who are simply hoping, hoping for a chance at love, I know I can’t do it. I can’t simply turn them away with a harsh dismissal. Not me who knows how much the heart aches for something it’s always wanted but was never destined to have.

“I came to this planet looking for a new start,” I begin. “A chance to belong somewhere. And I’ve found that here, on my farm.” My eyes search the crowd again. But he’s still not here. I guess…I guess he’s not coming. Maybe he already got the news and decided to not bother. Decided to give up.

My heart aches some more. The disappointment threatens to overwhelm me and the demon in the back of my mind whispers that this is what I deserve. That I’m used to this disappointment.

But another part of me, something new, pushes back.

Tovan wouldn’t just give up like this, would he? No. Not the Tovan that slept in my barn, pretending to have a life-threatening injury when he could simply get up and leave. Not the Tovan who camped near my property because he just couldn’t keep away. Not that Tovan. Not the Tovan who held me. Kissed me. Loved me.

I refuse to believe he’s like all the others of my past.

I refuse to believe.

“I know I’m supposed to be impartial. To give everyone a fair chance. But the truth is…my heart has already chosen.” I meet the eyes of as many Kari as I can. “My core-rhythm as you would call it.”

Murmurs of surprise and discontent rise from the crowd. I raise my voice, speaking over them.

“I’m sorry if that’s not what you want to hear. I’m sorry if it goes against your traditions or your expectations. But I can’t pretend that I don’t feel what I feel.”

And maybe I’m a fool to be declaring it so loudly for a male who isn’t even here.

My throat tightens and I’m about to bid all the males farewell when the door slides open with such force that it rebounds off the wall, the sound echoing through the suddenly silent room. Every head turns, and I feel my heart leap into my throat as I see Arnak stumble in. His chest heaves, and there’s a wild look in his eyes.

I immediately fear the worst.

“Kahlesta!” he shouts. It’s a rough, urgent sound, one that rattles something inside me. “We need to get you out of here. Now!”

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