Listen to Confident
by Demi Lovato
Iwalked through the casino, past the ringing slot machines and packed roulette tables, sensing the hot gazes of various men on my body. I didn’t linger or hesitate—I’d gotten past the discomfort with my bold looks and curvy body, and rarely returned the attention unless I was interested for a specific reason. My tangerine wrap dress emphasized my boobs and ass. My red hair spilled down my back in wild curls I didn’t care to tame. My skin was a touch red from the sun, but I’d used body glitter to even out the tone and shimmer under the lights. My heels were strappy gold sandals from a new female designer making waves—and I was the one who got to showcase her brand to the world.
Tonight, the Borgata was my playground and I couldn’t wait to partake in some games.
My heels sunk into the red carpet as I headed to the bar to meet the group. After my hellish school experiences and too many years of hating myself, I’d decided to take back my power. I wasn’t someone who could hide, and trying to duck attention and make myself small had almost destroyed me. My fingers unconsciously skimmed my inner wrist, feeling the marks on my skin from my botched attempt to get the pain to stop. There were scars on other parts of my body when I’d been cutting, but now they just reminded me of a dark time that I’d transformed into something worthy of the past pain.
Now, people sought me out for my looks, my style, and my fashion advice. I knew icons in the industry and well-known brands wanted me to sell their stuff. But I’d become so much more than my social feeds. I was about to launch my own business selling fashion consulting to the masses, and all the money I’d saved from working my ass off had finally come together. I’d paid for the site to be created and linked to my social media accounts. My website was called:The Drip with Gabby, a place I could show off my talents to the max. Clients would live Zoom with me and I’d help them pick out outfits from the stores, online, or their own closets. I’d get to know their personality, style, and sizes, then guide them to create and brand themselves with current trends. I’d finished doing a dry run with a handful of customers, and was able to work out the kinks before launch.
Getting the funding for an app was my next goal.
My site was a gamechanger. If it went big like I hoped, I could quit Red and go full-time.
I’d been underestimated my whole life. First, the world saw an overweight, shy, awkward girl with nothing worthy to say. Then I was the school slut to be shamed. Then the pretty girl influencer who didn’t have a brain. I used to hate the consistent judgment from people who didn’t know or give a crap about me.
But now?
I liked it. Because no one ever saw me coming.
Adam was waiting for me. We’d arranged to meet a little early to get our buzz on and our game plan. Dinner was at Bobby Flay’s place, then we’d do the bar hopping circuit. I was always pleasantly surprised at how hard this group partied, and no matter how bad shit got, they came together the next day. There seemed to always be an argument, but it was forgotten and forgiven, especially with Daisy being the ultimate peacemaker. Even with Landon and I, and how bad we fought in the beginning, she was starting to get real with me and open up. I could tell we were starting an honest friendship. And I knew once I was accepted into the inner circle, I’d have people who had my back.
The real question?
Would those bonds survive once I revealed my bombshell?
I wasn’t sure. Maybe I needed more time to decide. Maybe I’d just ignite the flame, step back, and study the fallout.
“Hey,” I said, grabbing the seat next to Adam. “You look good.”
He wore tight black jeans shredded at the knee, and a purple t-shirt with a ragged hem and print of an elephant. His jaw held sexy scruff, and his hair was freshly washed and slicked back from his forehead. A diamond earring glittered when he leaned over to casually kiss me. “So do you. As always. Here, I ordered you a martini. Extra dirty.”
I pursed my lips in thanks, sighing at the cold sting of the liquor sliding over my tongue. “Yum. So, how was your day? Get a lot of writing done?”
He nodded, tipping back his beer. “Finished the song we were stuck on. Facetimed the band and did a rough run through. Think it’s gonna stick.”
“That’s awesome.” I studied his face, noticing the flash of satisfaction in his dark eyes. “What’s next? Cut the tracks and go on tour?”
“That’s the initial plan. Now that we finalized the songs, we’ll record. We have some big gigs lined up in New York, and then JJ said we may go to LA.”
My eyes widened. “No shit? You okay with leaving New York? Doing the rock star thing?”
He shifted in his seat, his finger tapping the edge of his beer bottle. There was an air of discomfort that leaked from his aura. I’d gotten really good at studying people; their habits, weaknesses, passions. Sometimes, knowing how to navigate the landscape in the world of school and bullies made the difference of survival. Adam was harder to read than most, but when I figured something out about him, it was like finding a gold nugget. He fascinated me from the beginning. Adam hid behind the hard shell like a turtle, but underneath? He was kind and warm.
Too bad I couldn’t fall in love with him. Then again, friendship was so much better and more powerful. Sex could either ruin a relationship completely or bond it. Realizing we both decided not to complicate our friendship had been a decision we both made for a good reason.
Because he was completely in love with Landon.
“Are you giving me shit, too?” he grumbled under his breath. “I’m not a fucking rock star. I have to sing these damn songs and show people I can write. Then I can step into the background.”
I considered his words while I sipped my cocktail. “Don’t kid yourself, Adam. If you get big, which is a possibility, they’re not going to let you fade away. Everyone wants fame and money. You may get stuck.”
His silence was pissy. I waited it out. “I won’t let them trap me,” he finally said. “I’ll get out.”
“You’re a wolf. You’re going to chew off your own paw for the price of your freedom, aren’t you?”
He blinked. “What the hell are you talking about?”