Page 36 of Yearn

We finished prep and headed to our table.

Later that night, feeling buoyed from a good session with my friends, I walked into Back Door with a goal. It was time to face Adam and reset. Keeping my distance wasn’t possible in our group. Better to face the situation and him head on. No more angry banter or charged insults. I was done with thinking about him in a sexual way. I’d support his new route with music, and try to be a neutral, distant friend. It was the only way to move forward.

We claimed a section at the bar and ordered drinks. Elle and Daisy were thrilled I was giving Gabriella a chance, and by the time we joined the guys, there was an easy energy with the group that hadn’t been there before. Max scooped me up and went in hard with the PDA stuff, kissing my neck and running his hands all over my body. Normally, I loved the attention and thrived, but tonight I edged away, needing a bit of space to breathe.

Adam nodded in greeting, then ignored me. It wasn’t the hurt, angry kind, but the I-don’t-give-a-fuck kind that made things so much worse. I tried not to think about the last time we were together, entangled against the wall, his body imprinted onmine, his lips inches away as he whispered dirty, filthy things in my ear and made me wet.

The chatter was all about his new direction with fronting a band. Noah was out of his mind with excitement. “Are you holding tryouts or is JJ hand picking? Did you sign a contract? Are you cutting an album with your songs or a mix of co-writers?”

I watched Adam grin and felt a surge of longing to share in his success. Gabriella had her arm slung casually around him as he spoke. My gaze flicked to the embrace and back to his face, noting his usual laid-back vibe held a nervous type energy. “Nah, I’m not big enough for tryouts, man. I met with a band today—small local crew who were pretty cool. Tomorrow I’m meeting Unison—they play at a lot of the local clubs.”

Cooper snapped his fingers. “We saw them before at that bar in Soho. They know how to hold a crowd.”

“That’s what JJ’s looking for. I’ll be working in the studio to go over all the songs, and see what needs to be changed or tossed. These bands want new material.”

I cut in. “But your main job will be singing, right? You’ll be the face for the band?”

Adam swiveled his head and finally looked at me. For a moment, his dark eyes seared into mine, holding; burning; assessing. For one perfect moment, it was like that night and we were totally connected; physically, mentally, and emotionally. I caught my breath as adrenalin rolled through my body, but then he turned impassive again, growing cold. “That’s right. JJ explained getting someone to look at my songs is almost impossible unless someone’s performing it. After Gabriella’s video went viral, he said I have all the factors to get my work attention, but I have to be the one to do it. Hooking up with a band who needs that role filled is the fastest way.”

“But that’s not what you wanted. You said you’d never be a lead singer.”

Max groaned. “Here we go. Babe, just let Adam have his moment.”

Usually, Max’s sharp defense of Adam would piss me off, but I knew he thought I was trying to be bitchy. Only Adam knew it was bigger, and that my question meant to challenge what he’d told me about refusing to settle or compromise on what he wanted.

Adam flicked his gaze over my face, his voice hard with dismissal. “We want a lot of things, princess. But sometimes we have to settle when there’s no other choice, don’t we?”

My cheeks burned as the words pierced through me like a bullet.

Max interrupted before I could come up with an answer. “Adam, I think it’s cool as fuck. Congrats, man, we’re going to have a rock star in the group.” His grin was wide and easy, and he hooked his hand through mine. “Now, let’s get trashed and dance. We may not have as many of these nights together if you go get all big and famous on us. Time to turn things up.”

Max pulled me to the dance floor, wrapping his arms around me and swaying to the music. Usually, I loved when I was his only focus; loved to be stroked and pet in front of the jealous crowds who wanted Max for themselves. I could feel the envy of women around us, judging and assessing. I tried to get into the moment, locking my hands around his neck and kissing him as our hips swayed to the music. Cooper quickly grabbed Elle, and Elle took Daisy’s hand to join them. Soon, we were all back together, grinding and drinking and shouting, leaving Adam and Noah behind.

Even in my tipsy fog, I couldn’t stop thinking of how Max dismissed Adam, as if his success was a minor victory in his eyes. With a flick of his fingers, he’d stripped Adam ofeveryone’s attention and taken back control of the evening. Had I ever noticed it before? The entitlement of Max’s actions. How he always needed attention or to be the leader. No one ever questioned the hierarchy of the group, including me. I’d always believed I was equal to Max, but I was starting to realize he didn’t feel the same. I may be his girlfriend, but he still made the rules.

Adam’s moment, the one he’d worked for years to achieve, had been passed over.

Because of Max.

I didn’t like it, but I wasn’t sure what to do. Things had always been good with all of us. Why was I suddenly questioning everything?

Max spun me around. “God, I can’t wait until you’re finally all mine,” he groaned in my ear. “We’re gonna be so good together, baby. You’re the one.”

The words thrilled me at the same time a deep yearning for more shuddered, demanding to be slaked.

I ignored it, kissing Max, thinking about Adam, and cursing all of us.

Chapter Sixteen

Adam

Listen to It’s Time

by Imagine Dragons

Within a week, everything changed.

I’d made fun of Landon and her addiction to social media, but that same thing I sneered at had been a game changer. Suddenly, my inbox was flooded with messages after Gabby posted my live performance and something had hit right. I wasn’t naïve enough to believe I was the best musician out there—it had been a perfect storm. And I needed to take advantage, even if I wasn’t happy with the terms.

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