Page 28 of Yearn

I used to think so. Now, I had serious doubts. Which led me down a path of sheer terror.

What the hell did I really want to do?

The judgy gaze of my father kept jarring my brain on repeat. Knowing my stepsister was going to be someone under his guidance. The broken dreams of my mom, who’d once been known for her television role in a famous sitcom, then gave it all up for a man who left her. Now, she drank and spent his money with no claim to anything.

What was I truly meant for? Would I ever find it?

“Drowning your sorrows, princess?”

My head shot up. Adam grinned, sitting next to me on the barstool. “You gotta be kidding. Are you following me?”

He ordered an IPA and turned a mocking glance toward me. “No. Why would I?”

My cheeks flushed. “Because I left you cozying up to Gabriella. Unless you had a quick bang in the bathroom and have the rest of the night free?”

His lower lip quirked. “I don’t like bathroom bangs—not my thing. Why do you have such a hard on for Gabby?”

I grit my teeth at him using a nickname for her. It stunk of intimacy. “Because she’s a wanna be. She’s after my boyfriend, my friends, and my followers.”

He threw back his head and laughed. I fisted my hands and glared. “Are you really that full of yourself? She’s got her own stuff going on. I doubt she needs you.”

His comment stung so I stung back. “Yeah? Then why is she practically throwing herself first at Max, then you? Why is she pushing so hard to work with me in my section at Red? Why does she keep stalking my friend group if she has her own life?”

He shrugged and sipped his beer. “I don’t know.”

I shook my head. “Exactly. You know nothing about how women work.”

The smirk was back. “I know how you work.”

I quirked my brow. “Are you really that full of yourself?”

He laughed again, but this time there was a strange prick of pride from getting a reaction. Our banter was legendary and Adam kept me sharp. When one of us struck, there was a genuine respect. The whole dynamic between us was fucked up.

“Figured you’d be home waiting for Max.”

“Nah, he said not to wait up. Figured you’d be celebrating with Gabriella.”

“Nah, she had to head out. Guess it’s you and me.”

I wrinkled my nose and took a sip of my wine. “It was supposed to be just me until you crashed my party.”

“Pity party?”

I refused to let him see my weakness. Admitting I was lost to this man would kill me. He’d already stolen my vulnerability that one night to use in his song. “Just some soul searching. You wouldn’t get it.”

“Bet I would.”

I didn’t intend on answering. It was too dangerous to be with him like this, alone in the shadows, sharing secrets. But I also knew Adam was the only one in the group who had a fucked up family like mine. “I saw my dad. He came into Red with my stepsister.”

He remained silent, letting me gather my thoughts. I continued. “I haven’t seen him in years. He pretty much left me and my mom and started a new family. It was like he got a do-over because his first attempt failed.”

“What did he say to you?”

My laugh held no humor. “He was polite but wanted to know why I was waitressing when I had a degree. Then he compared me to my mother, which wasn’t a compliment. Guess his daughter is heading to Princeton. He bought her a Ferrari for her high school graduation present.” The bitterness seeped in and tried to take root. “Even worse? She was nice.”

“Fucking prick.”

“Yeah. That’s about describes him. Wished me luck and walked out without a glance back. I’m such an idiot to think it’d be any different.”