I nod in agreement.
“If those kids are in trouble, I plan to save them then and there,” Cillian says with a bit of bite in his tone.
In less than a second, the nice and friendly Evie is gone, replaced by the woman I know well. “If you can follow them, and they are safe for the time being. We might be able to findallof the kids at once and therefore save themall.”
Evie stands up, putting Cillian below her as she uses her commanding voice.
“The mission is to save themall, Cil. What happens if we get these kids and they kill the others just to prevent them from getting caught, and they go on to start this all over again somewhere else?”
Alexi stands behind her, having her back in the decisions she makes. As do I. These kinds of operations are tricky. They require finesse and timing. If we can find all of them together, it will give every kid better odds at survival.
Cillian’s jaw ticks, his breathing growing heavy. Without thinking about it, I place my hand over his in his lap.
“We need to save them all, Killer.”
His eyes move to mine and soften slightly. I know kids being trafficked is a hard subject for him, but we have to do this right.
After a minute, he nods in agreement and I remove my hand.
“What do we do about the guards?” I ask, turning my attention back to the plan.
For the next four hours we go over every detail of the plan for the day. Once the tension seems to leave the room, it’s actually very productive. Boris has some good ideas about the perimeter, and Alexi brings up some points about logistics of a three man team since Evie and her crew have to stay back.
When we finally wrap up the meeting, I think our plan is pretty solid.
“Can I talk to you for a sec?” Evie asks before leaving.
“Of course.” I lead her to the balcony on the third floor, and we sit on the chairs by the table, where I tend to enjoy having my morning coffee while Boris and I read. It’s peaceful.
“Soooo,” she drawls. I knew this was coming.
Ever since she saw the way I looked at her with Cillian’s arm around her, she knew.
“Do you know who he is?” I ask and she shakes her head. “He’s… we were supposed to get married. He was the first boy I ever…”
Memories of the two of us rush through my head. Running through tulip fields, laughing until my stomach hurt, snuggling up around a campfire on Cillian’s family’s property. The words to describe what Cillian was to me get stuck in my throat, like thefeeling of acrid smoke tainting all of our memories together and the sounds of cries I will never forget.
“Holy fuck,” Evie breathes and I nod, looking out over the fields, trying to forget that burn of ash in my nose that seemed to linger for months.
“Yeah.”
“Does Boris know?” Her tone is gentle and non-judgemental.
“He knows most of it.” I remove my tied up messy bun and run my finger through my hair, letting it fall in my face to shield me from the world for a second.
“Are you okay?”
“I thought so. Great, even. I thought my life was finally coming together, but now I don’t know what to feel. I thought he was dead.”
I take a chance and look up at Evie, but whatever she’s thinking, she’s guarding it well.
“What do I do?” I ask quietly, not sure I’m ready for the answer.
“Ness, you know my answer, but I don’t know if you’re ready for it.”
I’m not. But I need someone to say something before my heart actually rips itself in half.
“Please.”